My two boys are full-on toddler. I have a three year old and a two year old and they love to play and run and jump (well, try to jump) and eat cookies and doughnuts and drink their juice. They love trains and basketballs. Mickey and Pooh are their close friends. They each can be found always having a ball or a car in their hands. I wouldn’t trade them for the world and I love being a boy mom. 

Most nights, I have the privilege of putting them to bed. When they start rubbing their eyes or asking for their lovey (the one little blanket the younger sleeps with) I know the still of bed time is drawing close. We typically read Goodnight, Moon and 5 Minute Bible Stories and then pile all the stuffed animals on the bed and say a prayer. As I hold hands with my older son and say a prayer with him, I’m often reminded of the simplicity that our heavenly Father wants to hear from us. God is super gracious to hear our weak and humble prayers, prayers that are filled with joy and prayers that are also filled with fear and uncertainty. 

Tonight was one of those reminders. 

There are times in life when my faith is super strong and could definitely move the tallest mountains in the world. And there are other times when it is struggling and fragile with life’s circumstances battering the coast of my faith. My son and I had just read the story of Abraham and Sarah when they received the news that Sarah was going to be be pregnant in all of her aged glory and deliver a boy who would be the heir and the father of many nations. 

She laughed. My son and I laughed. 

And then I read the question at the bottom of the page. It had something to do with the truth that God keeps his promises. As I prayed, I voiced aloud the reality that God is faithful and keeps his promises. He kept his promise to Abraham and he will keep his promises to me and my family. 

I was so convicted as I prayed that prayer. My sons can hear me all day every day talking about the goodness of God and how faithful he is and how he is awesome and mighty. However, if at the end of the day, I don’t match my actions to my words, my words are dust and they will not affect my sons and their young faith at all. My sons need to see me abide by my words and put feet to my theology.

One of the verses I’ve been meditating on for the past week is a familiar one to most Christians: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Trusting is doing. Acknowledging is doing. Doing – living every day, walking by the truth of God’s Word even when I can’t see how our future is going to turn out, trusting in Him to be the keeper of His Word and how every promise is yes in Christ – that is believing. I want my sons to have a believing Mom.

Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.