You’re six months old today.
Everything about you is so much bigger now—including the personality that’s showing through. But today? I want to soak in the littleness.
It’s a weekend, so I get to put you down for your naps. Your daddy took your brother to the store, so it’s just you and me.
It’s quiet. You have my full attention with no distractions.
As we rock, your eyes start to roll back in your head. You sigh and put your hand on my chest—as if to make sure I’m still here.
Sweet little one, this is the only place I want to be right now.
You let out a little giggle in your sleep—you haven’t done that in a long time. I can’t help but let out a little one of my own.
I know I should put you down and let you sleep.
I know I should help you learn to self-soothe. I should put you down and rub your back . . . watch your eyes close and walk away.
I just . . . I can’t. Not just yet.
You see, I’ve done this before. I know how fast time goes. And I’m pretty sure you’re my last baby.
Every time I put you down and close the door, I can see one snuggle session I’ll never get again.
Every time I put you down on the ground to play, I can see you get a little closer to crawling.
Every time I put you down after you’ve been fed, I can see you get a little closer to not needing to be held while you eat.
Every time I put you down, I can see you experiencing more of the world around you—one that encompasses more than just me.
Don’t get me wrong, sweet little one.
It’s not that I want you to stay this little forever.
Watching you grow and learn is one of the greatest joys of my life. I am so proud of who you’re already becoming, and I am so excited for every moment that’s ahead of us.
I know that one day, you’ll go from needing me to snuggle with you, to rock you to sleep to wanting me to. I’ve been there with your brother, so I know what a great feeling that will be.
I’m just not in a hurry to get there.
So right now? When it’s just you and me, and you still fit perfectly in my arms?
I’m going to hold onto this little moment—with this little you—for just a little bit longer.