When I think of these past months the word that comes to mind is heavy. Each day there is more news that weighs on my heart.

I’m an empath, so the hurts of others become mine to some degree. The suffering and struggle of so many and the endless conflict some days makes me feel buried in darkness.

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As I watched church last week, I learned a term I’d never heard before “benevolent detachment” and it was just what I needed. I want to share it in hopes it helps someone else.

If it all feels like too much, that’s because it is.

We receive as much information in one day as our ancestors did in a lifetime just a couple of generations ago. Let that sink in for a minute.

Our souls weren’t meant to carry around all of the hurts and hardships we hear of. For myself, that was a relief to hear, because I have been carrying around so much that I didn’t know what to do with.

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Benevolent detachment is the practice of saying, “Jesus, I can’t carry this, but you can.” So, this week, I’ve been trying to release the burdens to the One who is strong enough to carry them. It is a freeing practice, friends, and I hope you’ll give it a try.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t empathize with others or have a responsibility to do our part in bettering this world we share. What I’m saying is if you’re feeling like these days are overwhelming and your spirit is being crushed, it’s time to reevaluate.

We aren’t meant to carry all of the information we’re presented with; we just aren’t capable of it.

If you’re an empath or a helper, you can’t help but feel all the feels and want to spring into action, but that isn’t sustainable. It is going to leave you exhausted and unable to love those around you well.

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I know when I take in all of the news and feel overwhelmed, I feel powerless. I lose sight of the ability I have to make an impact because I feel some pressure to do something big. What that is, I have no idea, then I feel like a failure, and that’s a frustrating cycle.

If I hand over the heavy things I can’t carry on my own it frees me to focus on what I’m capable of. And those small things I can do make ripples that perhaps extend further than I realize.

I encourage you to hand it over.

Originally published on One Grateful Girl


Michelle Koch

Michelle truly believes that our lives are meant to be amazing adventures and that those adventures can keep us close to home or take us around the world. She dreams of living in the country, but within close proximity to a Target. She is married to a guy she has loved for more than 25 years and doesn’t feel old enough for that to be possible. Her son has her wrapped around his dirty little fingers. Michelle writes about seeking grace, celebrating beauty, and living with gratitude at One Grateful Girl. You can connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.