If you’re a momma then you’re in the trenches everyday.

It’s called Stuck in the Muck.

It’s not a life-threatening condition nor a horrible to be place.

It’s more of a “I knew this wouldn’t be easy but sometimes it’s so overwhelming that I feel like I am going to lose it and almost did” place.

Stuck in the Muck.


Are there any reliable solutions for getting unstuck?

Bad News: None of any permanent measure.

Good News: There are a few methods that can temporarily make you feel unstuck, although you’re really not, but it works anyway techniques.


Of course we are doing this on auto pilot, yet somehow if we consciously focus on our breathing it can calm us and center us. There are scientific explanations but who has time for them?

Focus on hearing yourself breathe in and out and if you can stand in front of a mirror for a second or two watch your chest expand and deflate. Inhale, exhale. CAUTION: Do not fall asleep standing up. Of course that’s a silly thought. There’s a screaming baby and a toddler tugging your kneecap. No worries there!


The immediate change in temperature causes minor physiological changes (again, a great scientific explanation awaits you, just not here) that are at once pleasant and distracting.

Any newborn would tell you that sucking anything is soothing. No different for the mommas.

If one cube is not sufficient, suck again.

We need hydration to keep us afloat which we generally overlook so it helps with that, too!

If you would like to add some snazz and pizazz you can make the cubes with a variety of flavors like cranberry juice cubes (bladder benefits), or orange juice cubes (potassium or sugar boost), or perhaps lemon-lime cubes which make you pucker and then it makes your kids laugh because they think you’re making a funny face!

Keep re-stocking the ice trays if your refrigerator does not come equipped with an ice-maker.


Not because nature calls, which we all know we never heed THAT call at the time it calls.

Most of us are “hold it in until we are ready to burst” mommas by necessity.

Go there to run cold water on your face and your hands.

If you have the bambinos with you, sit them safely on the floor with some plastic toys and juice boxes.

And ready?

Get in the bathtub.

That’s right, the bathtub with your clothes on (no slippers or socks or shoes).

Pretend you have been granted time to luxuriate in a bubble bath (I know this is the stuff dreams are made of).

Lay your head back which hopefully will stretch your sore aching neck muscles which hopefully will feel good.

Put your legs out in front of you and wiggle your toes. Watching your toes wiggle seems silly and is kind of fun.

Try sticking one of your toes in the faucet like Julia Roberts did in “Pretty Woman.” It will make you think of the movie which will take your focus off your trench and make you think of hers.

Plus she was singing at the time which leads us to our next technique.


Any song as loud as you can so that your kids look at you like you’ve lost your mind which you’re close to doing anyway so might as well make it worthwhile.

Singing is self-entertainment. Barbra Streisand you don’t have to be.

If you can do a little toe tapping accompaniment or a little soft shoe or some finger snapping go and jazz it up a bit! Think American Idol in your living room.

Got a hairbrush handy? Then you’ve got your childhood microphone to capture the glorious melodies!


Humming is cursing without being caught.

I actually hum the bad words in lieu of spewing and everyone around me thinks I am feeling joyful and then they act joyful and that makes me actually feel joyful and I’m not stuck in the muck.


Breathe, Momma. Breathe.

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Lisa Leshaw

Lisa Leshaw has worked as a mental health professional for the past 31 years. She currently conducts Parenting Skills Workshops, Group Counseling for Blended Families and Empowerment Circles for Women. As a consultant, Lisa travels throughout teaching Communication and Listening Skills, Behavioral Management Techniques and Motivational Strategies. To de-stress she performs in children's theatre and plays piano whenever requested. She is hoping to either write the next memorable musical composition or Great American Novel!

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