To my children,

I don’t know why God chose to put us together. Of all the moms and all the babies, He knew in His infinite wisdom that the four of us would be the perfect fit. He saw the billions of babes He would place inside wombs, and He always knew you would be the ones in mine. “Those three, they go to her.”

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He knew our edges and curves would perfectly mold into one another’s so that a beautiful landscape of family could be made in the end.  The final creationa seamless picture of color and life and joy.  

He knew the pieces of me that needed strengthening would be made stronger by raising you. 

He knew the struggles you’d face wouldn’t break me or make me run from you but to you. Always. He knew your cry would reach my ear, and that my heart would beat with yours. He knew that of all the people, in all the places, we would become a beautiful match.  

He knew the pitch of your voice would be the song of my spirit, and my hand holding yours would be the courage you would need to walk through doors that seem so big and scary.

He knew that of all the arms in the world, mine would be the ones you would need to fall into. 

He knew that in your fears, I would find courage and that you would raise the parts of me to life I never before knew existed. And these resurrected pieces? He knew they needed breath so I could help you find Him.

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He knew I would not, could not, ever give up on you. He knew we would just be.  Mother and child.  The complex, beautiful picture of sacrifice and love and joy. He created us to be us, and for that, I will praise Him for all of my days.

“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him” (Psalms 127:3).

Previously published on the author’s blog

Kalan Krueger

I am a momma to three minions and a very patient dog. A perpetual over-cooker of every single piece of chicken but can bake a mean banana pumpkin chocolate chip bread. I have lived some of life's darkest moments but choose to write about the light that God always provides. You can find me over at tattooedheart.org.