Dear Kids, Thank You For Being My Light in the Darkness This Year

To my children, 

This year has been hard.

It has felt impossible.

It’s been heavy and unimaginable.

It has felt lonely.

And while 2020 has been one thing after the other (whether it was disaster, devastation, heartbreak, or death), there is one thing that has gotten me through.

Well, technically it’s two things that have gotten me through.

You, my precious children. 

You have been the light in the darkness this year. 

I started out in postpartum depression after the birth of Sister. I had to force myself to leave the house and do things. Little did I know I would soon not be able to leave the house. Had I known, I would’ve spent more time taking you places before we experienced life under lockdown.

Whenever I asked God for help because I just didn’t know how I was going to make it through this season, I looked up and there you two were, playing and laughing together.

When it felt like everything was breaking outside these four walls, there you were to remind how good God is and blessed I truly am.

When the heaviness of isolation set in and I wondered how I could possibly do all of this loneliness, your snuggles and comfort reminded me how loved I am by you and your father.  

When it felt like I had lost my identity after quitting my job to become a stay-at-home mom, there you were to remind me of my purpose. 

You were there for it all this year. It was just you and me living the quarantine life.

And I wouldn’t have been able to do it all without you. 

Thank you for reminding me of my purpose and giving me comfort just when I always needed it during this difficult year. 

Thank you for reminding me that this world is not so broken because angels like you exist in it. You are my reminder from God that there is hope in this world. 

Thank you for being the light in the darkness. 

Love, Mommy 

To my 2020 baby who came into a world turned upside-down, thank you for the joy you bring.