So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

I cringed reading my friend’s Facebook post the other day. Her day had gone about as bad as possible. Complete with public toddler meltdowns and one kid making a run for it through a parking lot.

Gah. I’ve been there. And there was nothing I wanted more after reading that post than to offer my friend some comfort. Some empathy.

Just as I scrolled down the comments to post something to cheer her up, I paused at the comments already posted. The four comments before me all made reference to her needing wine. And while one or two of them joked about a glass of wine, one suggested significant wine. Like “let’s get you drunk” amounts.

I’m no saint, you guys. I used to do this, too. And for a long time, wine WAS my solution to stress. Wine after a hard day was my go-to for self-medicating. And maybe if it stopped at one glass, it wouldn’t have mattered much. But for me? It never stopped at one.

I’ve been sober for a little over a year. I think the biggest change in me is my reduced anxiety overall. I’m sure you’ve probably heard that alcohol is a depressant. So then why, after an especially tough day, are we encouraging our friends and ourselves to consume a depressant on top of how they already feel?

It’s become a cultural norm to suggest alcohol for just about anything—bad days, good days, boredom, celebration, even made up holidays like “National Wine Day”? And all of these suggestions? They’re not harmless.

For me, someone who could not stop at just one drink, they were triggers. They were justification to pop the cork. They were excuses to temporarily numb the strain in a way that would cause more harm when the buzz waned and I felt the pangs of withdrawal through headaches, shakes and a foggy brain.

But what if we changed the narrative? What if, instead of encouraging moms after a rough day with the kids to drink, we suggest something uplifting? Sunshine is a well-known natural lift. Exercise? Hello! And hiking or a nice walk is a beautiful combo of the two. I know it’s not as sexy as the hot chicks in the alcohol commercials. I know rappers never talk about getting lit from a great hike. But it’s a healthy, positive way to self-medicate when times are hard.

I know it seems inconsequential, and for many of you, I’m a total buzzkill because for you it seems like a harmless little joke. But for people like me, it’s a trigger. And it can be dangerous.

When I have a rough day with the kids, I don’t need wine. It’s probably the worst, most self-sabotaging thing I could do for myself, in fact. Please consider this the next time you encourage your friends to drink a “glass or three” when they cry out for help or sympathy.

Let’s change the narrative together.

You may also like:

Do I Really Need That Glass of Wine Just Because I’m a Tired Mom?

Because Kids? You Bet. But Let’s Leave It Off The Wine Glass

Celeste

About Celeste Yvonne: Celeste is a popular blogger and personality who writes about all things parenting. Celeste openly speaks about her struggles with alcohol, and two years ago she announced her commitment to becoming a sober mom for the sake of her health and her family. Her piece about a playdate that went sideways when another mom started serving mimosas has reached over 14 million people. Celeste lives in Reno, Nevada with her husband and two boys ages 3 and 5. Follow Celeste at http://www.facebook.com/theultimatemomchallengehttp://www.instagram.com/andwhatamom or http://www.andwhatamom.com

The Rollercoaster of Foster Care and Adoption

In: Living, Motherhood
Mother daughter photo on beach

After spending most of their childhoods in foster care, Addy and her brother Dominick had never been to a birthday party or down a water slide. They missed out on many childhood staples, but it was the least of their concerns. Addy was riddled with anxiety and panic attacks—crippled with fear that she would age out of the system before getting adopted. She carried a backpack full of anxiety fidgets to cope with her uncertain years in foster care. She had such a bad case of TMJ that the kids at school mocked her for adjusting her jaw every ten...

Keep Reading

While I Wait for Another Door to Open, I’ll Hold One For Someone Else

In: Faith, Living
Woman teaching another woman by computer

I’m waiting for another door. All my life, I’ve been told that when God closes one door, He opens another. And here I am, staring at the imminent end of the business I’ve built from nothing. Closing down what I started up from sheer willpower, too much caffeine, and the bold determination to work for myself. Scratching out what I made from scratch . . . and it feels horrible. God didn’t just close this door. He slammed it shut, boarded the whole thing up, and hammered the nails in where I cannot pry them open. Believe me. I’ve tried....

Keep Reading

The Pain of Loving an Addict and the Power of Love

In: Living
Couple embracing in hallway

Mental health is no joke. Addiction is no joke. In my experience, these things go hand in hand. People often turn to things like alcohol and drugs when they are looking for an escape from reality. And people with certain mental health struggles are more prone to addictions than people without. These behaviors are a cry for help. They are not attention seeking. They are not purposely trying to hurt the people in their life. They are saying in the only way they can they are drowning and they need a lifeboat. And it is hard on everyone involved. Having...

Keep Reading

Chrissy Teigen Announces She’s Pregnant With Rainbow Baby

In: Living, News
Chrissy Teigen pregnant

Hip, hip, hooray! “1 billion shots later . . . we have another on the way.” In a surprising, but much anticipated Instagram post, Chrissy Teigen delivered the exciting news: she and celebrity musician husband John Legend are officially expecting their third baby! Endeared to millions through her genuine and unfiltered approach to sharing her life on social media, Chrissy’s announcement was quickly met with an outpouring of love and support from fans, many of whom had been following since the model shared the absolutely devastating loss of her third pregnancy back in 2020. RELATED: Chrissy Teigen Opens Up About Her...

Keep Reading

Meeting the One Who Says “I Believe in You” Changes Everything

In: Living
Man and woman hold hands

“I want to major in journalism. I love writing. I want to be an author,” I said. “You can’t do that,” you said. “You’ll never make any money writing. You have to change your major,” you said. I heard the sad, sorrowful flutter of wings of a caged bird. And then silence.  Year after year, I allowed you to belittle me, to make me feel ashamed, and to see myself as unintelligent and worthless. When I was small, you felt big. I didn’t know any better because you were supposed to be a safe person. Unconditional love and support? Only...

Keep Reading

It’s Lonely Feeling Invisible

In: Friendship, Living
Woman standing in kitchen

I’ve never known what’s wrong with me. From such a young age, I’ve never had friends. I was never the girl who was invited to the birthday parties let alone the sleepover after the birthday party.  Now as an adult, I’m not the girl invited for drinks, moms’ nights out, play dates, or even to listen to a pyramid scheme.  RELATED: It’s Lonely Being the B-List Friend I’m not the coworker everyone loves. Or the classmate everyone envies because of her skill. I’m not making waves anywhere I go.  Not even with my own family. No aunt, uncle, cousin, or...

Keep Reading

I Left a Piece of My Heart in Room 208

In: Living, Motherhood
Classroom of empty desks, color photo

I walked down the hall, past the rows of bright orange lockers. Past the U.S. history classroom and the eighth-grade science room.  The next door was mine. Room 208. As I slipped the key into the lock, I noted the “Bring it on” poster my students fist bump on the way into the room (a fun class routine we started a few years ago). Without thinking, I softly kicked the door open as I turned the knob, knowing the door sticks when it’s hot. I walked inside, scanning the room, taking in objects that have been a part of my...

Keep Reading

They Just Played Dolls: Making Foster Children Feel Welcome

In: Living, Motherhood
Man and girl play dolls on the floor

“Mom,” my daughter whined, “I give up. I can’t do this anymore. She is driving me crazy.” I knew the feeling. It was a familiar one. We were doing a few days of respite care for a girl half our daughter’s age—seven years old—the same age my daughter was when she came to us as a foster child herself. My daughter, now 13, has grown so much in the past six years. When I asked for her help with this foster child, she was eager to take on the responsibility, but it quickly proved a trying task. “Mom, she’s just...

Keep Reading

But God is Still Good

In: Faith, Living
Woman looking out window

“I can’t afford a new one,” I thought to myself as I shampooed another stain. This can’t keep happening. Maybe I made a mistake. I have to make this last. And the couch. And the clothes. And all the things. We are done having babies. The price of food has doubled. It’s astronomical to fill the cars with gas. Things are closing in on me. How can I best serve my family? Survival mode engaged. When I read the news, when I follow the headlines, when I listen to the conversations around me . . .  I hear fear. Loss....

Keep Reading

I’m the New Mom at the Park

In: Friendship, Living, Motherhood
Mother and baby on blanket at park, color photo

I’m the new mom at the park. I woke up this morning with a goal in mind: to visit the park with my daughter. I looked in the mirror and whispered, “I’ve got this” as my 3-month-old slept peacefully. This little house has been a great shelter for this new mom and her baby, but it’s time to venture out.  I’m the new mom at the park. With the stroller filled with way too many things for a 30-minute trip. With the perfectly picked out outfit, hoping to fit in. With the tired eyes and dark circles from waking up...

Keep Reading

Get our FREE phone wallpaper to encourage you as the new school year begins

It's bittersweet for a mother to watch her child grow—but you both are ready to soar.