Dear Second Child: My Love For You is Second to None

My second child, you may have come in that order, but you aren’t second rate.

The only second you are to me is my second language—the one I had to learn because you were so different from my first.

My second wind—when things get too much, and some days they do, you look at me with a patience that gives me the grace to be patient with myself.

My second nature—yes, you’re your own little person, but things were a little easier this time around. I rested into it without the resistance of a first-time mum.

My second skin—I treasure our cuddles under a blanket where I can breathe you in like an old book.

I’ll admit I wasn’t up every second checking if you were breathing in your crib; I could feel it in my heart’s rhythm while I slept.

I didn’t check my app quite as often as to whether you were an avocado or the size of a pomegranate, and your scrapbook hasn’t come together yet . . . in fact, it’s still a thought in my mind.

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Yes, your clothes might be secondhand, and the milestone photos aren’t as planned out, sometimes they’re a few days late.

You hear me yell more than I’d like to admit. You didn’t arrive into peace and quiet. My soft sing-song voice is usually interrupted by a crash somewhere and then more yelling.

I hear myself often saying, “Hold on a second,” or, “Wait a second.” But this doesn’t mean you come second. I envision a time-lapse of you playing by yourself and me rushing around you like a tornado. I promise I am trying to slow down, and I love just us time, please don’t give that a second thought.

I’m still learning the math of dividing my attention and subtracting more of me so I can give my all to you.

I may not be able to give you everything you want, but I will always try to give you everything you need, please don’t second guess that.

Know in your little core how special you are to me.

Yes, you are my second child, not the second half of my heart but the other half.

You didn’t make me a mama, but you’ve made me the mama I am proud to be.

I’d move mountains for you in light-seconds.

And my second child, my love for you is second to none.

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

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Articles by Jessica Urlichs

Jessica Urlichs

Stay at home mother to my two children Holly & Harry born a year apart. Lives in New Zealand with her husband and of course Bentleigh & Winson, my two adorable fur babies. Writing has always been my passion since a young girl, I love to connect with others on this challenging yet incredible journey of motherhood. Follow along on Facebook and Instagram.

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