Becoming a mother has brought me back to you in a way I didn’t know was possible.
After years of doing everything on my own, without your counsel, here I am, calling you every single day to share everything that is happening.
Sometimes I call in the morning, or during nap time, or right after I put my son to bed, and you always answer when I call. No matter the time of day or my fifth time calling you in an hour because we keep getting interrupted.
You are patient with this season of my life.
You always let the conversation be all about me. Even when I talk about the minor details of our day, you never seem bored. I am sure you don’t care when I tell you everything I cleaned up in the house or how many loads of laundry I did, but you listen.
Now, I live eight hours away from you, and it’s so hard on me. All I want is to sleep at your house and have breakfast with you. All I want is to put my son to bed and stay up talking with you. All I want is a hug from you on the bad days.
You love me and my son better than anyone.
I tell you all the time I don’t know how I would get through motherhood without you, and this is an understatement. You have been the only person who has been there for me without expecting anything in return.
When I am tired, you understand. When I am angry, you understand. When I am emotional because I love my child so much, you understand. When I am sick of cooking dinner, you understand. When I want to go away for a week alone, you understand.
How do you understand it all, Mom?
And then you share your stories of motherhood, and they make me feel less alone. You have normalized everything I’ve felt.
The first year of motherhood, you reminded me how hard it is when I am tired. This reminder gave me hope that one day I would sleep again and it would get easier. And it did. And when I am having a hard day, you always ask if I slept well last night.
When I have challenges in my marriage, you always encourage us. You are always rooting for us to make it through every single hardship.
You always tell me I am a good mom, and these words from you fill my heart with everything I need.
I trust you with anything.
I never have to hide or sugar-coat what is happening, I can tell you the unedited version, no matter how gross or awful or embarrassing it is. And mom, sometimes it is so gross I can barely tell you, but I do and we end up laughing.
You help me not take myself so seriously.
Your love never goes anywhere—it is always there and I can feel it.
The last time I visited you, I cried when I walked through your door. Seeing you feels like home. In a phase of my life where everything is constantly changing, having you provides me the strength I need each day.
Mom, I thank God every day for you.