I am so busy. Aren’t you? How busy are you?
I don’t know about you, but I am so busy, I can’t even see the end of my busy-ness.
At the start of this school year, I announced to my family that we will have less busy-ness. Less commitments, more home time, more family time and more time together. And we do.
I just didn’t know it would be in the car.
Let me start off by saying: yeah, I know, we are all busy. Families are busy. We have stuff to do. Sports. Music. Dance. Work!
I even have my own home-work that gets done in the wee hours of zero dark thirty am! I often have my daytime work that I bring home to work on.
I work full time (you all know that because you’ve read my previous posts), my husband works full-time and must travel for his job, and I’m left to handle the life with kids, dogs, and all the stuff that goes with them!
And I know I don’t have it half as hard as some other families. We are not facing a terminal or chronic illness. We are not dealing with a divorce (although….well, that’s a different blog post about home renovations).
Yet, somehow, this fall, is the busiest we’ve ever been. Why? What’s different?
I now have a mid-schooler, so the home work load is different, not more. Just different. The Mid-Schooler gets his home-work done, for the most part, in school. He’s in school sports, so, that’s coordinating pick up and drop off with other parents (thank GOD for the other parents!). The little one, my 4th grader, has about the same amount of home-work as in 3rd grade: math, handwriting, spelling, social studies and science. But, the teacher is so amazing that she planned out all the due dates for most of it that I just have to follow her direction!
So what is it?
My job requires more of me. I took a promotion in the spring, but, wow! I was not expecting to have such a work load after my 8 hour day. And with my husband traveling each week, home on weekends, I’m burned out.
That’s it.
I’m burned out. I took on too much AT WORK! That’s insane, right?
My hours are a straight Monday thru Friday 8: 00 am to 5:00 pm. So , why do I have more work after work?
My kids ask me that same question.
Why can’t I just leave the work at work? I have deadlines, and due dates and contract obligations and deliverables for the contract and the crazy reports that go along with that. Plus, I have a crew working on my team, and when they need help, I drop what I’m doing to make sure they have what they need to get their job done.
I’m accessible.
A dear friend said to me, “You need to put your needs first, then you focus on the ones around you.”
I’ve never put myself first. My kids and husband come first. They just do.
And I’ve put my needs off so much that I’ve become worn down, emotionally drained, and sick. Literally.
And now, I will put myself first. I will go soak in a hot bubble bath, hop into snuggly pj’s, and shut out the world.