Free shipping on all orders over $75🎄

My husband and I moved to a new town for his job a few years ago. I had many fears about moving; packing, building a house, finding a church, and leaving my family and friends behind. But my biggest apprehension in coming to an unknown place was making new girl friends.

Finding my tribe.

Discovering my people.

Taking my place in a new circle.

And if I was really lucky, finding my person.

You know who I’m talking about. That unicorn friend that you’ve always dreamed of. The girl who just gets you. You know… the unicorn friend. Your best friend. The one.

Now unicorn friends are something that I had only heard of before moving to our little town. From what I had been told, she shares all of your interests, parents the same as you do, has your same style and you can share clothes with her, and you like the same type of pop (so for me, someone who loves Coke, but definitely not Pepsi. So gross). So when we moved to our little town of 2,000 people and no stop light, I didn’t have high expectations in finding my unicorn friend. I was really just hoping to find a group that resembled a circle and that I could somehow fit in.

And then I met her. My unicorn. But I didn’t know it at the time.

It was about 6 months after we had moved to our little town and we were both sitting around a mutual friend’s kitchen table at a Bible study. As I looked around the table, I started evaluating the level of potential friendship with each woman (don’t judge, you know you’ve done it, too). And guys, she was the last person I thought could be a close friend, let alone my unicorn.

She loved to style hair and do make up and I wore a pony tail and no make up every day.

She was a laid back parent and I was a helicopter mom.

She was modern and trendy I was old fashioned and vintage.

She was short and I was tall.

And you guys….. She. Loved. Pepsi.

It was over for me, she could not be the one.

But one day about 6 months later there was a knock at my door. My second child was about 4 months old, colicky as crap, and I hadn’t slept in weeks. I opened the door, wearing nothing more than yoga pants and a nursing bra and there she was with a cup of hot coffee, a card, and a hug. Like a real hug. And I needed it so badly.

“I just want you to know that I love you and you’re a great mom. I’m here if you need me,” and then she left. And from that moment on everything changed because she has been there for me every moment after that, and I’ve been there for her.

You see friends, it isn’t about your common interests, the way you parent, or how you dress. It isn’t even in the way you order your pop.

It’s about the way you love one another. It’s about intentionality. It’s about honesty. It’s about cheering one another on when you’re doing great and calling each other a butt head when you’re being one. It’s about finding someone who values friendship the same way you do, holding onto one another’s hands and hanging on for dear life; Coke in one hand and Pepsi in another, and fighting for one another’s hearts. And it’s showing up to someone’s house who’s completely opposite of you with coffee, a card, and a hug and loving them well.

So the next time you find yourself sitting with a group of women around a kitchen table, don’t look for the girl who looks just like you. Wait for the moment when she shows up. Or be the one to show up.

Just make sure you know whether she likes Coke or Pepsi.

Yes it can be hard to find your best mom friend. But we promise - it's possible! Here's how to find her/him. www.herviewfromhome.com

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Lauren Eberspacher

I'm Lauren and I'm a work-in-progress farmer's wife, coffee addict, follower of Jesus and a recovering perfectionist. When I don't have my three kids attached at my hip, you can find me bringing meals into the fields, dancing in my kitchen, making our house a home, and chatting over a piece of pie with my girl friends. I'm doing my best to live my life intentionally seeking all that God has for me and my family. Follow me at: www.fromblacktoptodirtroad.com From Blacktop to Dirt Road on Facebook laurenspach on Instagram

When Your Kids Ask, “Where Is God?”

In: Faith, Kids
Child looking at sunset

How do I know if the voice I’m hearing is God’s voice? When I was in high school, I found myself asking this question. My dad was a pastor, and I was feeling called to ministry. I didn’t know if I was just hearing my dad’s wish or the call of God. I was worried I was confusing the two. It turns out, I did know. I knew because I was raised to recognize the presence of God all around me. Once I knew what God’s presence felt like, I also knew what God’s voice sounded like. There is a...

Keep Reading

Go Easy On the Parents Who Refuse to Skip Naps

In: Kids, Motherhood
Two little boys and their sister walking down a gravel road, color photo

Greetings from a mom who is done with napping children. It’s great to have the flexibility during the day for longer activities, meeting friends for playdates, or day trips to faraway places. It’s a new life . . . the life without naps. The freedom to make plans and keep them. But not that long ago, I was something very different than the flexible, plan-keeping, up-for-it woman I am today. I used to be the mom who refused to skip my child’s nap. Yep, that one. Here’s the thing, for a lot of parents, It’s so much more than just a...

Keep Reading

My Heart Isn’t Ready for You to Stop Believing in Santa

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little boy standing in front of lit christmas tree

“My friend doesn’t believe in Santa anymore, Mom,” my son said out of the blue the other day. We were driving in the car, and when I met his gaze in the rear-view mirror his eyes searched mine. Immediately, my heart sank.  This sweet boy, he’s our first. Thoughtful and smart and eight years old. A quick Google search tells me that’s the average age kids stop believing in Santa, but as his mom, I’m not ready for that—not even a little bit.  I can still hear his barely 2-year-old voice going on about reindeer as we lay together on...

Keep Reading

Motherhood is a Million Little Letting Gos and Fresh Hellos

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother sitting with child on her lap by the setting sun and water

I missed my grocery-shopping buddy the other day. Mondays are usually the days my littlest and I knock out our grocery list. In the past, we’ve dropped the kids at school and then headed to the store. I grab a latte, and she chooses a hot chocolate. But that day, they were all in school. That day, she sat in her kindergarten class, and I went to the grocery store. Alone. A new rhythm. A changed routine. A different season. I listened to a podcast on the drive. My podcast. Then I grabbed a drink. Just one. I got the...

Keep Reading

Dear Kids, This Is My Wish for You

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother hugs three kids

To my kids, The world you’re stepping into is unlike anything I experienced at your age. It’s fast-paced, interconnected, and sometimes overwhelming. But within this chaos lie countless opportunities for growth and joy. My wish for you is that you find the perfect balance between embracing the modern world and staying true to yourselves. Change is one thing you can always count on. Embrace it because it’s often the motivation for growth. Embracing change doesn’t mean letting go of who you are; rather, it’s about evolving into the best version of yourself. Remember, you don’t need to have all the...

Keep Reading

Dear Daughter, Stay Wild

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother and daughter on beach, color photo

I can’t really put my finger on it. Or manage to find all the words. But there’s just something about that girl. Maybe it’s the way her hair sits tangled. Curled up at the end. The way she moves. Dances. As if everyone was watching. Or no one at all. RELATED: There is Wild Beauty in This Spirited Child of Mine It could be the way she smiles. With her heart. The way only she can. The way she cares, loves. For everyone. For herself. You see, she is beautiful in the way only wild things are. The way they...

Keep Reading

You’re Becoming a Big Sister, But You’ll Always Be My Baby

In: Baby, Kids, Motherhood
Pregnant woman with young daughter, color photo

The anticipation of welcoming a new baby into the world is an exciting and joyous time for our family. From the moment we found out we were expecting to just about every day since, the love and excitement only continue to grow. However, amidst all the preparations for the new addition, I cannot help but have mixed emotions as I look back at old videos and pictures of my firstborn, my first princess, my Phoebe—for she will always hold a special place in my heart. As the anticipation grows, my heart swells with a mix of emotions knowing we are...

Keep Reading

Cowgirls Don’t Cry Unless the Horse They Loved Is Gone

In: Grief, Kids, Loss
Little girls Toy Story Jessie costume, color photo

The knee of my pants is wet and dirty. My yellow ring lays by the sink—it’s been my favorite ring for months. I bought it to match Bigfoot’s halter and the sunflowers by his pasture. Bigfoot is my daughter’s pony, and I loved him the most. The afternoon is so sunny. His hooves make the same calming rhythm I’ve come to love as I walk him out back. A strong wind blows through the barn. A stall labeled “Bigfoot,” adorned with a sunflower, hangs open and I feel sick. I kneel down by his side as he munches the grass....

Keep Reading

Let Them Wear the Costumes Whenever They Want

In: Kids
Kids in costumes walking around living room

I have five children. My oldest is 18, and my youngest is 8. Over the years, I have bought quite a few Halloween costumes. It always starts in late summer—the kids start getting excited about dressing up and want to start looking online for costumes because they want to make sure they’re delivered on time. As the kids have gotten older, a couple of them have even planned out costumes a few years in advance. It’s always fun watching their excitement, and it’s always fun “sharing” the candy with them. One of the things I’ve always done is allow them...

Keep Reading

Boys Are Feral and Raising Them Is Worth Every Single Wild Moment

In: Kids, Motherhood
Muddy boy plays by water

Coming from a home with three sisters and practically swimming in an ocean of estrogen my whole life, I had no idea what to do with a boy. When I had my firstborn, boyhood was a complete mystery to me. Having boys and a girl, I can tell you that they require you to tap into two completely different sides of parenting. Both are hard in their own ways. But raising boys is just constant noises, weird smells, and bizarreness. If you’re a boy mom, you know exactly what I mean. My sister, mom of two girls, is always a...

Keep Reading