A lot can change in a year. As a mom of two young athletes, I read about the beauty and absurdity of youth sports. My social media feeds are filled with satirical posts from fellow sports moms. As a mom raising the next generation, I read about the importance of developing their healthy habits, teaching my kids to do their best, and demonstrating grit. Of all the roles I assume, being their mom is the role I spend the most time trying to improve.
At this time last year, our then 8-year-old daughter was training year-round as part of the compulsory gymnastics team at her gym. She was competing at USAG-sanctioned meets and in her first few seasons, we’d been all over the southeast to cheer her on as she competed. Competitive gymnastics is a thing of beauty. It’s also intense.
Last spring, as she was about to level up and train new skills, our daughter quietly approached us and said she wanted to try something new. It was a mature conversation. We asked if she was sure. Competitive gymnastics wouldn’t be easy to walk away from. She’d spent her time focused in the gym since she was four years old. She’d made sacrifices. She’d invested a lot of herself in training. She bravely and confidently assured us she wanted to learn new things. A lot can change in a year.
Teaching kids grit, honoring commitments . . . surely, I had read something that would help navigate this with our daughter. This was one of those times when I questioned if I was doing the right thing. Should we let her quit? Should we convince her to keep training? How do you know when it’s right to walk away from something you’ve devoted a lot to? How do you teach your kids to know when the timing is right? As her mom, I worried for her. She had been a successful gymnast, would she suffer a crisis of confidence if she wasn’t good at her next interest? Would she regret her decision?
But she was not worried. In the same conversation when she shared her decision to quit gymnastics, she eagerly told us she wanted to play softball and take tennis lessons. She’d never done either of those sports, and she wanted to give them a try. And so we did. We registered her for softball and found tennis lessons. This winter, when one of her softball teammates invited her to play basketball, she gave it a shot.
She learned new skills. She met teammates and made new friends. She experienced new success. She even transferred some of her strength and conditioning from the gym to her new sports. And she didn’t regret her decision. A lot can change in a year.
There are so many decisions we encounter as parents. I find myself constantly questioning: Am I doing this right? Is this a good choice for now and their future? And so often, we don’t know until we try. But that’s hard when you’re raising little people. I want to position them to be their best selves. I want to make the right decision and see the benefit. Walking away isn’t necessarily giving up, it can be opening up to new opportunities. Sometimes making the right choice is supporting them as they make their own decision. That’s a lesson I can’t say I’ve fully learned. But I’m still a work in progress. A lot can change in a year, and I’ve learned that sometimes change can be good.
by Connie Cumming 
