Journal Relationships

Where the Alt-Right Gets It Wrong

Written by Carolyn Moore

A couple of years ago, a well-known white supremacist moved to North Dakota. He bought an abandoned, run down house a few miles from the Canadian border, and much to the dismay of the town’s small population, moved in.

I happened to visit that town a few weeks ago, and of course, drove past his house.

It was disgusting.

In addition to being in obvious disrepair, the house now has offensive anti-Semitic phrases painted in black, bold lettering on the siding, a white nationalist flag waving in the wind. My husband and I shook our heads and drove a little faster, not wanting the four kids in our backseat to start asking questions that have ugly answers.


Another white supremacist has been in the headlines lately—but this one doesn’t fit the typical profile of what you probably imagine when you conjure up a white supremacist. She’s a mother of six, a self-described follower of Christ and the Mormon Church, and an extremely active member of the alt-right, white nationalist movement operating under the guise of standing for traditional values.

Stop right there.

Think back, for a minute, to that man I mentioned at the beginning. That town he’s living in? It’s FULL of people who support traditional values. You’re either Catholic or Lutheran (with a few Methodists sprinkled in for variety). Hard-working, decent people live there working the land, raising their families, improving their community. They show kindness to perfect strangers, and they’re the sort of folks who are quick to invite you to the church basement for ham sandwiches and cold salads if you happen to be in town.

But these people who generally describe themselves as being conservative? They’re horrified to be lumped in with the likes of white nationalists who pervert a perfectly valid and widely held worldview.

I know, because I’m one of them.

It’s almost scary to say aloud these days: “I’m a conservative.” But I, like millions of others, am. I believe marriage should be between a man and a woman. I’m pro-life. I’d like to see the federal government be less involved in our lives.

In no way, shape, or form, do I support racism or white supremacy. I don’t hate immigrants. I’m not interested in running lesbians out of town on rails. I know what I believe, and I’m respectful of those who disagree with me. Full stop.

That mom blogger and her nearly 30,000 Twitter followers turns my stomach. That spray painted hate speech makes my heart hurt. They don’t represent me, and they don’t represent the millions of other conservatives who are becoming increasingly afraid to talk about their beliefs—for fear of being equated to people like them.

It’s possible to hold traditional values without being a bigoted, homophobic monster. It’s possible to have beliefs without persecuting others. It’s possible to love someone who holds a different view than mine, or lives his life differently than I do.

It’s called being a decent human being.

One night, when my oldest daughter was a kindergartener, she was in the bathtub happily splashing away. Then, completely out of nowhere, she chirped, “There’s a boy in my class who has two moms, did you know that? Wouldn’t it be fun to have two moms?”

My heart stopped. I wasn’t prepared for this conversation yet. I wasn’t sure how to approach something so delicate, how to explain to her that we believe God intended marriage to be between a mommy and a daddy. But we don’t get advance warnings for these teachable moments.

I remember taking a deep breath, looking into her big, expectant eyes, and telling her that you know, some people live differently than we do, and they might not believe the things we do about what the Bible teaches. It’s like how we don’t say “Oh my God,” in our house, but some other people do. 

Her brow furrowed, and I could see her mind working, teetering on the edge of a judgment that could define this issue, or at the very least lay the groundwork for her beliefs.

I told her then what I’ll tell all of my children whenever this kind of conversation comes: “Just because we see things differently, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be friends. We can love everyone—we should love everyone—and we can be different from each other.”

She brightened. Yes. This was a thing her five-year-old mind understood. I think it’s a lesson the world needs to be reminded of.

We can hold different views from one another. We do hold different views from one another. And guess what? WHO CARES.

Radicals like that alt-right blogger or the white supremacist don’t believe that—and that’s what makes them monsters.

About the author

Carolyn Moore

Carolyn traded a career in local TV news for a gig as a stay-at-home mom, where the days are just as busy and the pay is only slightly worse. She lives in flyover country with her husband and four young kids, and occasionally writes about raising them at Assignment Mom


  • Yes! I love this. I don’t know what mom-blogger you are referring to, but I certainly feel the same way as a fellow conservative.

  • I completely agree! And the way you presented the topic to your daughter, simply and about the big picture, was perfect!!! I hate feeling like I need to keep my beliefs to myself because of the judgement from others & the generalization that I share any beliefs with some white supremacist or that mom-blogger. It’s shameful, but it shouldn’t stop one from being comfortable speaking their mind about their beliefs. I love this post so much!!!

  • “I believe marriage should be between a man and a woman. I’m pro-life. I’d like to see the federal government be less involved in our lives.”

    While I respect the sentiment of this article and definitely believe in the healthy debate between political parties, I cannot wrap my head around why “conservatives” believe in less government, yet yearn for regulation of such personal decisions such as marriage and reproductive rights. The statement above, an excerpt from this post, is a contradiction. “Less government” should not include restrictive and expensive regulations that align with particular religious beliefs. Religion and government should be autonomous from one another.

    This seems like a nit-picky comment, but I think it represents the fundamental reason that liberals and conservatives cannot seem to reconcile their political beliefs – because they are no longer just political beliefs, but rather beliefs about how life should be lived, usually involving religion or a lack of religion. This is a country of great diversity, and a wonderful experiment, and it is a shame to see a political party lose so much respect and voter support simply because it began to champion religious beliefs over political ones.

    I appreciate you writing this article, I would love to see more conservatives join you in denouncing the horrifying views of the alt-right, and appreciate your awareness and effort of separating conservatism from it. Yet, if conservatives wanted to be conservative, they would denounce regulation of families, the bedroom, and the body. I wish that we could get to a point in this country that people could separate their religious beliefs from their political ones.

  • “We can hold different views from one another. We do hold different views from one another. And guess what? WHO CARES.

    Radicals like that alt-right blogger or the white supremacist don’t believe that—and that’s what makes them monsters.”

    You couldn’t be more mistaken about that. It’s not anybody’s views we have a problem with. It’s our views they have a problem with. Actually, it’s our existence they have a problem with. And you’re piling on here with your virtue signaling.

    The whole “I’m a conservative but I’m not a big meany like those other horrible white people. See how horrible they are? I’m not horrible like them!! Horrible!!!”