Kids Motherhood

Instagram Said I’m a Bad Mother

Instagram Said I'm a Bad Mother www.herviewfromhome.com
Written by Charlie Gray

I have an incessant need to be the best, it’s been that way for as long as I can remember. Oscar’s baby book’s have been re-started about 3 times now as they just aren’t good enough. His nursery is regularly re-decorated. I constantly feel like he might be behind in his development. I always feel like I’m not weaning him properly, like there’s some big secret that everyone else knows about feeding that I don’t. Then one day I realized why this was- Social Media. 

Social Media grew and grew and latched onto my life, little did I know when I made my Instagram account that I would soon be measuring how good I am as a mother by comparing me on the sofa in my PJ’s with Oscar watching Disney – with a woman who has a 6 pack 8 days post-partum in her fresh white house with her beautifully decorated nursery. I can’t be the only one who does this? I have come to realize that is a snapshot of her day, simply a 1 second out of 86,400. 

Just because I’m eating Nutella on toast for breakfast instead of an Avocado bagel does that mean I’m not a good person? Just because I haven’t put make-up on today and the baby is in his nappy instead of clothes – does that mean I’m not a good mother? NO! 

But how do we move away from this black cloud of expectation that looms over us? Not just as parents but as children, teenagers, women, men and couples. I know my younger siblings friends post on social media how much their parents got them for Christmas and how they got the newest pair of trainers. Women post pictures of their beautifully manicured hands and huge engagement rings, their toned bodies and freshly dyed hair. Men post muscle gym pics and meal prep and couples.. 

Well it’s just been Valentines Day, need I say more?

All these photos added using a perfect filter. I will admit I’m definitely guilty of doing it.  I don’t post pictures when Oscar the baby has had an explosive nappy.  I don’t post a selfie when I haven’t showered and my hair is scraped back into a messy bun.  I don’t post pictures of my washing pile (that I really MUST see to). I post pictures of the highlight reel. Because who wants to see the lower points of my life? Maybe you. Maybe we need to balance it out a bit, show those other areas of our life. I know I need to see that sometimes, something a bit more realistic. I follow Mummy’s who have ‘Instagram themes’ you know the ones where all the photos look the same? Using the same filter etc. We’re over editing our life and it’s sad. 

IT’S TIME PEOPLE- It’s time to post pictures from the cutting room floor. Share this post on your social media with your version of your un-edited day.

I need it, and I expect you do too. 

About the author

Charlie Gray

Charlie is a blogger, owner of a publishing company and most importantly a mother to a very handsome little boy.

She grew up and lives in The New Forest with her partner.

Charlie enjoys all things Beauty, Baby and Beyond. Her little boy gives her plenty to write about but so little time to do it in, so any moment spared is spent letting the world know about their crazy adventures.