Gifts for Mom, Grandparents, Besties and YOU🎄 ➔

In our church, October is Respect Life month. This week, the focus was about respecting life. All life. That every life is worth living. Before mass began, the children were invited to be a part of the procession. My 3 kids joined in with many of their friends. I was so full of pride when I watched my older kids help their youngest sister walk down the aisle. At that moment, I was so incredibly thankful that I’ve been blessed with these kids. Three lives that are very much worth living. Three lives that make my life richer. Three lives that could have went in a very different direction.

My kids were all adopted at birth. The fact that they were placed for adoption tells us that their parents were facing a crisis pregnancy. For whatever reason, they felt they could not handle a baby at that time. Or they simply weren’t ready to be mom. To be dad. We all know what their options were.

I don’t know if any of my kids’ birth parents ever considered abortion or not. That’s a personal and extremely emotional question that I will not ask. It’s an option that many choose but it’s definitely not something that everyone considers. I’m going to assume it really wasn’t an option that my kids’ parents seriously considered. If they had, my kids might not be here. Not with their first parents. Not with me. Just not here. My world would have been a whole lot darker.

When you’re facing a crisis, you do things you might not normally do. You’re scared. You panic. You’re desperate. You look for something to make it better. Whatever it is. It’s a hard place to be in.

When you’re facing a crisis pregnancy all of the options seems scary. Parenting is hard (but especially when you don’t feel ready to take on that role). Adoption is also so incredibly hard. It’s full of unknowns and saying good-bye. None of it is easy.

I am so proud and thankful that my kids’ birth parents respect life. They could have made a different choice. Ended the pregnancy. Make those little lives simply disappear. Pretend it never happened. Instead they gave our kids life. It wasn’t an easy process for any of them. They had to face questions and judgement from others. They had to make the gut-wrenching choice to place those lives in someone else’s care. They had to say good-bye to the life they had a hand in creating. They sacrificed so much for those kids. They get glimpses of the children and the lives they are living. While those visits and pictures aren’t ever really enough, hopefully it’s enough to help ease the pain of all they went through, if even just for a moment. It wasn’t necessarily the easy choice (none of them are) but because they respect life and love our kids, our kids are living and enjoying life.

And my life is certainly a whole lot brighter with all of them in it too.

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available for pre-order now!

Pre-Order Now

Alissa Kay

Alissa was born and raised in the Midwest and currently calls Wisconsin home. She's happily married to her college sweetheart and she's living out her dreams of being a stay-at-home mom. Although, let's be real, she's hardly ever home. She's the mom to 3 kids who all came to her via adoption. A boy (8) and 2 girls (6 and almost 4!). The kids keep her plenty busy, but when she has free time she enjoys a night out with friends or curling up with a good book.

I Almost Aborted My Miracle Baby

In: Abortion, Kids, Motherhood
I Almost Aborted My Miracle Baby www.herviewfromhome.com

This is it. The very moment we’ve been waiting on for three years is finally here! After all the tears, after the fear and after so many prayers, my husband and I had made it to the pinnacle of our pregnancy! The journey to get to this very point, although emotionally and physically taxing, was definitely worth it. Only by faith were we able to make it to the finish line because we almost aborted this baby. I’ve always wanted to be a mom, so one would think excitement would be my first reaction to the news of being pregnant....

Keep Reading

Stop Calling My Loss An Abortion

In: Abortion, Child Loss, Grief
Stop Calling My Loss An Abortion www.herviewfromhome.com

I had an abortion. Actually 1 in 4 women have one. You might have had one, too. It’s a hurtful word, isn’t it? Especially when no “choice” was made. You see, by the terms of my insurance papers and by medical standards I had an abortion. Did you know that a natural miscarriage is actually called a spontaneous abortion? Jarring isn’t it? It’s especially jarring when your pharmacist scolds you for taking “abortion” medicine, your physician demands to know why you had a “prior abortion,” your insurance won’t pay for a procedure because it’s an “abortion,” and your Sunday School...

Keep Reading

The Truth About Late Term Abortion

In: Abortion, Grief
The Truth About Late Term Abortion www.herviewfromhome.com

  I had a late-term abortion procedure.   Although I’m a very private person, I can’t keep silent any more.   I’m mad that there are women who are not told the truth about abortion. I’m furious, actually. I saw firsthand the destruction caused by the lies about abortion.   After my baby’s heart stopped beating late in my pregnancy, I was sent by my doctor to an abortion clinic in Los Angeles to have the procedure known as a Dilation and Extraction. I had no idea beforehand that my doctor had sent me to an abortion clinic. There were...

Keep Reading

Why Is My Son’s Life Worth More Than His?

In: Abortion, Faith, Inspiration, Motherhood
How Many 'Likes' For My Convenient Pregnancy? www.herviewfromhome.com

Earlier this week we shared our exciting news with the wide world of Facebook; after two precious little girls, we will be having a baby boy in February! I think most of our friends knew that we were praying for a son, so their excitement for our family meant a great deal to both my husband and I. As we shared a picture of a little flannel onsie along with a sweet tiny profile of our boy from the ultrasound, the likes and comments came flooding in and our friends were clearly overjoyed for our news. The next morning, when...

Keep Reading

Crib Notes

In: Abortion, Grief, Kids, Motherhood
Crib Notes www.herviewfromhome.com

How often does one really have the opportunity to truly savor a multi-sensory time-travel? At my small Pittsburgh apartment, I find myself staring at the dollhouse I’ve recently re-inherited just after Mom passed away. Becoming a mom all over again, this time to a daughter just a few months after mom’s passing may be just what re-fuels the maternal. Once again, I’m that girl again who creates objects made from simple materials: a postage stamp picture frame tacked to the living room wall made from cardboard, a postage stamp and some glue. As I pull out the grimy looking dollhouse...

Keep Reading

If I only had a voice

In: Abortion, Grief

It’s very dark in here mom But He said I’ll be okay That there’s no place safer for me mom That you were made a special way   I told Him that I’m scared mom He said you might be too But I promise that you’ll love me mom If only half as much as I love you   He said I’d have to be a strong man mom When we heard daddy say goodbye I wish I could see you mom I hate to hear you cry   He said I might not meet daddy mom But I think...

Keep Reading

Abortion: The Child I Never Had

In: Abortion, Child Loss, Featured, Grief, Journal

This person wishes to remain anonymous, due to personal and professional persecution and prejudice. Abortion is a very controversial subject. I am pro-choice, but I respect the opinions of those women who are pro-rights. I had a rough childhood, which consisted of sexual abuse at a young age. The sexual abuse caused me to act out during my teen years before I understood why I exhibited self-destructive behavior. I experimented with drugs and alcohol, and I was a promiscuous girl. I thought sex was the equivalent of love and I had no respect for my body or my soul, for...

Keep Reading