A Gift for Mom! 🤍

Today I Packed Up My Classroom, and the Emptiness Broke My Heart All Over Again

2 Minute Read

By Julie Everett

Empty classroom — Image via Julie Everett

Today was hard.

I didn’t sleep last night, in anticipation of getting to be in this space today. I thought I had prepared myself mentally and emotionally for what today would bring. But the truth is, I wasn’t prepared.

I arrived to this space at 8 a.m., finding it filled with silence.

No giggles. No smiles. No hugs. No familiar faces, or bright eyes. Silence.

RELATED: The Sadness is Real: An Open Letter To Teachers

I looked around the space, feeling overwhelmed about the day I had ahead of me. My eyes leaked. My heart raced. I felt anxious about the allotted time I had been given to clean and pack and put away all the things that were a part of the lives of seventeen children and my own, just two months ago.

I went about the day, picking things up as I organized and packed, fondly remembering the moments of learning, laughter, silliness, excitement, dreaming, sharing, and loving that transpired within this space. My eyes did more than leak. I had not prepared myself for this day.

RELATED: Dear Students, We Didn’t Even Get To Say Goodbye

I didn’t get to whisper the last goodbye into the ears of those familiar faces with the bright eyes. I didn’t get that last bear hug. I didn’t get the last eight weeks in this space. And the truth is, I’m struggling tonight, leaving this space.

So I’m sitting here praying that my 17 littles and their families are finding their own space in this time of uncertainty and upheaval.

I wish I could say a proper goodbye and hug each of my littles just one more time . . . in this space . . . where things felt safe. And happy. And peaceful. And joy-filled. And perfect.

RELATED: This is the Sweet Spot of the School Year, and Missing it Hurts

I wasn’t prepared for this day. Just as I’m not prepared to leave this space right now.

This article originally appeared on Facebook

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Julie Everett

Along with cooking, I have a profound love of teaching--children and adults alike. I am an Instructional Learning Coach for Kearney Public Schools. I live on a lake along the Platte River with my husband, Jason. We have three children: Brittany, Gordon, and Colvin. I enjoy running, biking, long walks, painting, decorating, hanging on the beach, reading, and of course, cooking and eating! If you would like to contact me, you may do so by emailing me at: [email protected]

May is Maternal Mental Health Month, and So Many Moms Are Quietly Drowning

In: Living

I’ve given birth to four beautiful boys and lived through four postpartum experiences. Each one has been different, yet there are familiar threads that run through them all. In the first couple of weeks after my first baby was born, I felt carefree…until that bubble was popped. My newborn got sick and was admitted to the PICU at a children’s hospital 30 minutes from our home. At one point, doctors mentioned the possibility of meningitis, but after many tests and a several-day admission, we were sent home. When we were discharged, a doctor left me with these words, “It’s your...

Keep Reading

The Hard Truth about Friendship in Your 40s

In: Friendship

No one can really prepare you for how much friendships change in your 40s. We expect life shifts—kids grow, schedules fill, jobs demand more, and aging parents need us in new ways. Time becomes tighter, priorities change, and naturally, friendships have to adjust. That part makes sense, right? But what doesn’t get talked about enough is the quiet, hard shift, the one where it’s not just time or distance creating friendship gaps, but something deeper. What happens when you look around your “table” and realize it no longer feels like a safe place to land? What happens when you start...

Keep Reading

Sisterhood is So Special

In: Living

There’s something about sisterhood that’s so special. It’s having someone who’s seen every version of you—every awkward, messy, beautiful version—and loves you through it. Someone who holds a piece of your heart in a way nobody else can. Someone who remembers the little things that made you…you. And my sister? She’s that person for me. We couldn’t be more different. She’s extroverted, the life of the party, spontaneous, the more the merrier, always seeing the good in everything. I’m the cautious one, the loner, the guarded one, more comfortable sitting on the sidelines. I’ve always admired her and secretly wished...

Keep Reading

No One Plans to Wear the “Scarlet Letter” of Divorce

In: Living, Marriage

Divorce often feels like the scarlet letter no one talks about. Some in our generation may call it “trendy”—particularly as women have become more independent and empowered—but whether it’s socially acceptable or not, it is still a label no woman enters marriage expecting to wear. Women are often self-sacrificing—sometimes to a fault. We give and give until our souls feel nearly drained. And in marriages marked by abuse, substance abuse, infidelity, inconsistency, or dishonesty, we still convince ourselves that if we just give a little more, love a little harder, try a little longer, something will change. Divorce is not...

Keep Reading

Hannah Harper Is Every Mom with Babies in Her Arms and a Dream In Her Heart

In: Living, Motherhood

Hannah Harper American Idol winner sings with her young son on her lap

By now, you’ve probably seen the posts flooding your feed: A young mom. Three little boys. A guitar strap embroidered with her children’s drawings. And a crown. When Hannah Harper won American Idol this week, moms everywhere erupted. And honestly? Same. There is something collective about watching a stay-at-home mom win on such a large stage. The celebrations have been pouring in. Moms, we can do it. She didn’t abandon her dreams. She went for it. And all of that is true, and all of that is worth celebrating. But I want to add something to the celebration. Not to...

Keep Reading

To Those Who Dreamed of Something Different on Mother’s Day

In: Living

Mother’s Day is one of the hardest days of the year for me. The truth is, I always wanted to be a mom. I’m not a mother. Not in the traditional sense. And while I usually stay quiet on days like this, today I want to speak for the ones who carry this ache quietly…without cards, without flowers, without answers. In college, I was the girl with pillows under her shirt, daydreaming about baby names and planning a future I never got to hold. I once bought a house and made a nursery for children who never came. I remember...

Keep Reading

In Your 30s the Stakes Feel Higher

In: Living

I’m in the years where I’m not old, but I’m no longer young. Some women my age are just announcing their first pregnancies, while others like me are navigating pre-teen and teenage years. The 30s hold a different kind of tension. The days move faster now. Not because little feet are toddling through the house, but because the calendar is always full. Afternoons are spent running kids to practices, sitting in parking lots, and juggling dinner between drop-offs and pick-ups. The conversations are deeper. The questions are bigger. The stakes feel higher. This season isn’t about sticky fingers and sleepless...

Keep Reading

Sometimes You Just Need a Day Off—Give Yourself Permission To Take One

In: Living

I didn’t need a sick day. I needed a well day—and I didn’t realize how much until I finally took one. We’ve labeled our time off into neat, acceptable categories. Sick days are for fevers and doctor appointments. Personal days are reserved for emergencies and obligations. But what about the in-between days? When there’s no real diagnosable health issue and no major event or appointment that needs attendance. The days when there’s nothing technically wrong, but everything feels off. A day when you’re barely hanging on, but still showing up. That’s where the well day comes in. On behalf of...

Keep Reading

I’m Learning To Feel Like I Belong In a Room Because I Want Her To Know She Always Does

In: Living, Motherhood

It took me 39 years to like myself. I mean really, honestly look in the mirror and say, “You go, girl.” I understand the concept of progress, not perfection, but the idea of always working on myself became a tiring and unrelenting objective. Here I was shrinking that waist, smoothing my skin, studying hard, working way too late, and often burning the candle at both ends to yield results that were still less than the ideal. It’s all well and good to be a doer who sets reasonable and sometimes unreasonable goals, but throughout my teens and into my early...

Keep Reading

8 Truths for the Graduate Still Figuring It Out

In: Living

Teen girl sitting on grass looking at fountain

Dear Graduate, I know you’re feeling it all right now. Anticipation, trepidation, and then other times, you don’t know what to feel at all. I know because I once felt the same. I graduated from high school several years ago, and here’s what I want you to know: It’s okay if you don’t have it all figured out. Sounds cliché, but it’s true. Whether you plan to attend college, take a gap year, get a job, or you don’t know yet what you want to do, it’s okay. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. It’s so easy to fall into the...

Keep Reading

This Guy Rapping Dr. Seuss Books to Dr. Dre Beats is Straight FIRE

Living

This Guy Rapping Dr. Seuss Books to Dr. Dre Beats is Straight FIRE

Bring Back the Tradition of a Victory Garden

Living

Today I Packed Up My Classroom, and the Emptiness Broke My Heart All Over Again

I arrived to this space at 8 a.m., finding it filled with silence.

RELATED: The Sadness is Real: An Open Letter To Teachers

RELATED: Dear Students, We Didn’t Even Get To Say Goodbye

RELATED: This is the Sweet Spot of the School Year, and Missing it Hurts

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Julie Everett

May is Maternal Mental Health Month, and So Many Moms Are Quietly Drowning

The Hard Truth about Friendship in Your 40s

Sisterhood is So Special

No One Plans to Wear the “Scarlet Letter” of Divorce

Hannah Harper Is Every Mom with Babies in Her Arms and a Dream In Her Heart

To Those Who Dreamed of Something Different on Mother’s Day

In Your 30s the Stakes Feel Higher

Sometimes You Just Need a Day Off—Give Yourself Permission To Take One

I’m Learning To Feel Like I Belong In a Room Because I Want Her To Know She Always Does

8 Truths for the Graduate Still Figuring It Out

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

Today I Packed Up My Classroom, and the Emptiness Broke My Heart All Over Again

I arrived to this space at 8 a.m., finding it filled with silence.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

May is Maternal Mental Health Month, and So Many Moms Are Quietly Drowning

The Hard Truth about Friendship in Your 40s

Sisterhood is So Special

No One Plans to Wear the “Scarlet Letter” of Divorce

Hannah Harper Is Every Mom with Babies in Her Arms and a Dream In Her Heart

To Those Who Dreamed of Something Different on Mother’s Day

In Your 30s the Stakes Feel Higher

Sometimes You Just Need a Day Off—Give Yourself Permission To Take One

I’m Learning To Feel Like I Belong In a Room Because I Want Her To Know She Always Does

8 Truths for the Graduate Still Figuring It Out

Previous Post

Next Post

You May Also Like