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You’re Not a Bad Mom if Sometimes You Want Your Old Life Back

  • 4  Minute Read
Woman holding toddler while calming infant, black-and-white photo
Image via Amanda Seigel

As I write this, I’m holding a pacifier in the mouth of a crying 2-month-old who simply isn’t content with the soothing vibrations of his rocker and snuggling a 2-year-old who accidentally fell asleep for a nap at 6 p.m. While doing this, I can’t help but think this was not my life three years ago or even three months ago. But this is my life now, it’s only temporary, and I’ll probably miss it one day.

That being said . . . 

This is for all you first-time newborn mommies and even you seasoned moms with one, two, or even 10 kids. This is for any mama who has ever thought to herself or even verbalized the phrase, I want my old life back.

RELATED: I Fear I’ve Lost Myself To Motherhood

Listen to me. Feeling this way does NOT make you sound bad and it does NOT make you a bad mom.

In fact, it makes you human and it makes you an amazing mom.

You may be wondering, “How does this make me an amazing mom?”

You are an amazing mom because you have made so many selfless adjustments to your life in order to make that beautiful little baby happy and in order to give him or her the best life possible.

You are an amazing mom when you wake up more times than you can count to breastfeed your little love in the middle of the night.

You are an amazing mom when you feel like a prisoner in your own home because you have to sit attached to a breast pump for hours, literally hours, each day.

You are an amazing mom when you spend $30 on yet another container of formula.

RELATED: Dear Mama Reading This Right Now, You Are Amazing

You are also amazing when the coffee you made yourself at 7 a.m. is still sitting there at 7 p.m. because you simply haven’t found the time to drink it between feeding your toddler, feeding your newborn, wiping tears, playing outside, and snuggling your sweet babe on your chest because he is the King of Colic.

You continue to be an amazing mom when your child gets scared or can’t sleep in the middle of the night, summoning you to their way-too-small twin bed where you then spend the remainder of the night, hanging halfway off the bed because that same child fell back asleep horizontally.

The fact is, every single thing you do with and for your little human makes you an amazing mom.

When you think to yourself or utter the phrase, “I want my old life back,” yes, you are referring to your pre-kid life. You are referring to a time when you didn’t have to do the things mentioned above.

However, I promise you . . . these things you are doing will not last forever. Sure, you will likely find yourself making sacrifices for your child until the day you die, but remember, everything you do with and for your child is contributing to their well-being in some way, shape, or form.

RELATED: God Chose You To Be Your Little Love’s Perfect Mama

Keep in mind that nothing happens by accident. Those little humans who you love so much, even on the toughest of days, chose YOU to be their mama. They chose you because you are the perfect fit for them.

You were meant to be their mama and every single thing you do as a mom will pay off when you see the wonderful people they develop into.

Let me say it one more time, for the people in the back . . . it is OK to want your old life back. You will soon see that mom life is your new normal and that even though you need time for yourself on occasion, you’ll begin to realize you couldn’t possibly imagine life without your kids.

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

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Articles by Amanda Seigel

Amanda Seigel

I am an educator living in New Jersey with my wonderfully supportive husband and our two young sons, born two years apart. Since my motherhood journey began, I have become passionate about bringing to light, the issues and feelings that moms face on a daily basis, but are sometimes hesitant to discuss with family and friends.

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