Day 1:  Today is the first day of Christmas Break. Mom decided to make Christmas cookies. I found out that when I jump up and down with a thing of sprinkles in each hand that it makes sprinkle fireworks that cover the whole kitchen. After that mom just gave me cookies and told me to go watch a movie.

Day 2:  We went sledding today. I got mom to haul me up the hill 13 times before her back gave out. When we got home I cried because the hot chocolate was (get this) hot. Mom fell asleep on the couch, I got more cookies and played with her phone all afternoon.

Day 3:  Mom wanted a Christmas movie marathon today. She put on all these weird cartoony movies with reindeer and snowmen. I spilled my popcorn and soda, and she let me play with my DS while she and dad watch those lame old movies.

Day 4:  Mom got gingerbread houses to decorate today. I kept sneaking and eating the candy instead of putting it on my house and then I barfed. Now I’m in bed and she’s letting me watch movies.

Day 5. It’s Christmas Eve! We went to Nana’s house today. I wouldn’t eat Nana’s food and mom had to make me macaroni and cheese, and I didn’t eat that either. 

Day 6:  It’s Christmas. I made a new record this year, I unwrapped all my presents in 7 minutes flat while my sister was OOOOHing and AAAAHing over her silly new doll, and nobody noticed until I was done. I got bored after lunch and asked mom if that were any more presents. She didn’t answer, she just opened another bottle of wine.

Day 7:  We made the world’s best snowman today. I blasted mom in the nose with the most epic icy snowball ever! I’ve never run so fast as I ran away from her after that. It’s just a snowball, what’s the big deal?

Day 8:  We all have something throat. Nana said Aunt Nancy had it before Christmas Eve, but that she was sure it wasn’t catching anymore. After we went to the doctor and got our medicine, mom got something called Fireball. She said it’s mommy medicine.

Day 9:  I barfed all over my bed last night. Mom let me in her bed and I barfed all over that too. Mom had her Fireball Medicine for breakfast this morning.

Day 10:  I feel better today, but mom has the throat thing now. She gave me her iPad and told me not to make a noise all day. She made dad go get more Fireball Medicine.

Day 11:  Mom’s still sick  but dad’s sick too. Dad’s really loud and cranky when he’s sick and mom calls it his “Man Cold” and rolls her eyes. Mom says there isn’t enough Fireball Medicine for days like this.

Day 12:  Mom took me to a movie today because dad’s still sick with his man cold. Mom fell asleep and snored really loud in the reclining seats, so I ate all the popcorn and Mountain Dew. Mom says the back of the van will never be the same, but I’m still pretty proud of my epic popcorn and Mountain Dew puke.

Day 13:  Christmas Break ends tomorrow. Mom let us play video games all day today, it was awesome. Mom sent us to bed extra early. When I asked her why she said that it’s wine o’clock and that means time for bed. 

Day 14:  Mom was jumping up and down like a crazy woman when I got on the bus this morning. I hope it’s not because I forgot something. I bet she’ll miss me. Best Christmas Break ever.