My sweet, sweet four-year-old son surprised me today.

We were outside playing in the yard, and his younger sister was on our tree swing. After returning home from dropping his older sister off at dance class, he asked so meekly, “Could we play outside for a little bit and try to catch lizards?”

My first reaction was a grumble, and my first noise was a huff. Do we really have to do this again? I thought to myself. But, then I reminded myself of the fact that I recently decided I need to say “yes” more to my children. Far too often, I am a “no” mom.

No, we are not playing outside.

No, you cannot watch TV.

No, mommy cannot help you—I am working.

I come from such a place of no that I was starting to irritate myself. Thankfully this revelation did finally come to me, and this week I have been trying to do a better job of saying yes when appropriate and of focusing on the joy my positive response brings to my children.

Sure, we can play outside, I say. My son rushes in the door to get his bug catcher. After about what felt like 40 minutes (but was probably only about two), he began to get frustrated. He didn’t melt down which is his typical nature and that surprised me, but then he did something I had never seen him do before on his own without prompt or provocation.

He prayed.

He asked me to close my ears. At first, I didn’t know why, but as I looked over at him, I saw him connect his hands and interlock his fingers just as he does during pre-lunchtime prayer at preschool. I tried to honor his wishes, but I couldn’t help removing my cupped hands from my ears and trying to overhear him. I could only make out a small portion of what he was saying, but the gist of it was him asking God to let him catch a lizard.

Be still my heart. It’s been beating out of my shirt since the incident.

Not only am I proud of my little big man for not throwing a tantrum when his lizard search ended without the catch and release of an actual lizard, but more for asking for help when he needed it. I should tell you that he did ask me, but I refused to get close to any lizards, so he called in reinforcements.

This special moment between him and the real big guy turned into a memorable moment for him and me.

As you might have assumed, God didn’t let him catch a lizard. In fact, we didn’t see any more lizards at all after his prayer. Thankfully though, he found something else—perspective—and I probably wouldn’t have given him any had this moment not occurred.

My son rightfully wondered why God didn’t give him the lizard. I informed my main man that this was an excellent life lesson.

We talked about how sometimes in life we are going to ask God for things to happen or not happen and they may end up happening or not happening.

We talked about how, often, God answers our prayers, but not in the present moment or not in the way we would think or want—but that an answer always is received.

We talked about how God is not Santa; He does not make toys, and His role is not to give us objects that we pray for.

We talked about how God’s main job is to keep him, his sisters and all the children of the world safe, happy and healthy.

We talked about how he can speak to God his whole life whenever he is happy, sad, angry, excited or feeling any emotion at all.

This was a very unexpected extraordinary moment with my son, and it will forever be the reason I will always say “yes” to chasing lizards.

You never know what impactful occurrence you may miss out on when you aimlessly offer up a standard “no” to your child. Instead, say “yes”.

Say yes to their attempts at conversation.

Say yes to their attempts at learning.

Say yes to their desire for experience.

Say yes to answering their questions

Say yes to growing with them—in faith and life.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Nicole Merritt

Nicole Merritt is a mother of three and the Owner and Founder of jthreeNMe, an imperfectly authentic peek at real-life marriage, parenting, and self-improvement. jthreeNMe is raw, honest, empowering, inspiring, and entertaining; it’s like chicken soup for those that are exhausted, over-stressed and under-inebriated, yet still utterly happy. Nicole's work has been featured by Scary Mommy, The Good Men Project, BLUNTmoms, Thought Catalog, Everyday Family, Motherly & many others. You can follow Nicole at jthreeNMe and on FacebookPinterestInstagram & Twitter!

A Big Family Can Mean Big Feelings

In: Faith, Kids, Motherhood
Family with many kids holding hands on beach

I’m a mother of six. Some are biological, and some are adopted. I homeschool most of them. I’m a “trauma momma” with my own mental health struggles. My husband and I together are raising children who have their own mental illnesses and special needs. Not all of them, but many of them. I battle thoughts of anxiety and OCD daily. I exercise, eat decently, take meds and supplements, yet I still have to go to battle. The new year has started slow and steady. Our younger kids who are going to public school are doing great in their classes and...

Keep Reading

Motherhood Never Stops, and Neither Does My God

In: Faith, Motherhood
Daughter kisses mother on cheek

I’m standing in the shower rinsing the conditioner out of my hair with a toddler babbling at my feet, running through this week’s dinner menu in my head. “Hmm, this meal would be better suited for this day, so what should we do instead?” or “Maybe we should save that for next week since it’s easy and we will be busy with baseball starting back up. I can work something in that may take more effort in its place.” Being a wife and mother, running a household, it’s about the small moments like this. There’s something about it that is...

Keep Reading

So God Made a Sunday School Teacher

In: Faith, Living
Woman sitting at table surrounded by kids in Sunday school class, color photo

God looked around at all He had created, and He knew He would need someone to teach His children. So God made a Sunday school teacher. God knew He needed someone with a heart and desire to teach children God’s word. God knew the children would act up and made Sunday school teachers with patience and grace to guide them when they step out of line in class. He also made Sunday school teachers with a touch of discretion to know when the stories of a child may be real or imagined. God knew this person would need to be...

Keep Reading

But God, I Can’t Forgive That

In: Faith, Marriage
Woman holding arms and walking by water

Surrender is scary. Giving in feels like defeat. Even when I know it’s the right thing, yielding everything to God is scary. It also feels impossible. The weight of all I’m thinking and feeling is just so dang big and ugly. Do you know what I mean? Sometimes I cling so tightly to my fear I don’t even recognize it for what it is. Bondage. Oppression. Lack of trust. Oh, and then there’s that other thing—pride. Pride keeps me from seeing straight, and it twists all of my perceptions. It makes asking for help so difficult that I forget that...

Keep Reading

Dear Dad, I Pray for Our Healing

In: Faith, Grief, Grown Children
Back shot of woman on bench alone

You are on my mind today. But that’s not unusual. It’s crazy how after 13 years, it doesn’t feel that long since I last saw you. It’s also crazy that I spend far less time thinking about that final day and how awful it was and spend the majority of the time replaying the good memories from all the years before it. But even in the comfort of remembering, I know I made the right decision. Even now, 13 years later, the mix of happy times with the most confusing and painful moments leaves me grasping for answers I have...

Keep Reading

God Redeemed the Broken Parts of My Infertility Story

In: Faith, Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Two young children walking on a path near a pond, color photo

It was a Wednesday morning when I sat around a table with a group of mamas I had just recently met. My youngest daughter slept her morning nap in a carrier across my chest. Those of us in the group who held floppy babies swayed back and forth. The others had children in childcare or enrolled in preschool down the road. We were there to chat, learn, grow, and laugh. We were all mamas. But we were not all the same. I didn’t know one of the mom’s names, but I knew I wanted to get to know her because she...

Keep Reading

God Has You

In: Faith, Motherhood
Woman hugging herself while looking to the side

Holding tight to the cold, sterile rail of the narrow, rollaway ER bed, I hovered helplessly over my oldest daughter. My anxious eyes bounced from her now steadying breaths to the varying lines and tones of the monitor overhead. Audible reminders of her life that may have just been spared. For 14 years, we’d been told anaphylaxis was possible if she ingested peanuts. But it wasn’t until this recent late autumn evening we would experience the fear and frenzy of our apparent new reality. My frantic heart hadn’t stopped racing from the very moment she struggled to catch a breath....

Keep Reading

My Husband Having a Stroke at 30 Wasn’t in Our Plans

In: Faith, Living
Husband and wife, selfie, color photo

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” (Jeremiah 29:11, NIV) This verse in the book of Jeremiah has long been a favorite of mine. In fact, it’s felt relevant across many life events. Its simple, yet powerful reminder has been a place of solace, perhaps even a way to maintain equilibrium when I’ve felt my world spinning a bit out of control. In this season of starting fresh and new year intentions, I find great comfort in knowing...

Keep Reading

She Left Him on Valentine’s Day

In: Faith, Marriage
Husband kissing wife on cheek, color photo

“Can you believe that?” Those were the dreaded knife-cutting whispers I heard from across the table. I sunk deeper into my chair. My hopes fell as everyone would forever remember that I had left my fiancée on Valentine’s Day. Maybe one day it would just dissipate like the dream wedding I had planned or the canceled plane tickets for the Hawaiian honeymoon. Some bridesmaids and guests had already booked plane tickets. It was my own nightmare that kept replaying in my head over and over again. I had messed up. Big time. To be honest, if it made any difference,...

Keep Reading

God was In the Room for Our Daughter’s Open Heart Surgery

In: Faith, Motherhood
Child's hand with IV

I’ve had a strong faith for as long as I can remember, but I always felt bad that I never had a “testimony.” I had never gone through something that made me sit back and say, “Wow, God is real, He is here.” I have always felt it to my core, but no moment had ever stopped me dead in my tracks to where there was no denying that it was God. And then, that moment happened to me on December 5. After five months of fervently praying for a miracle for our daughter, the day came for her heart...

Keep Reading