Call me a romantic.

I never wanted an ordinary marriage. I never wanted a sleeping in separate rooms, ships passing in the night, we love each other but aren’t in love, we’re in it for the kids . . . kind of marriage.

I wanted the fairy tale. I wanted The Notebook. I wanted a love story for the ages kind of marriage. My husband reading me the story of our love to help me remember kind of love.

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I believe that if I fight hard enough for my marriage, if I treat him with dignity and respect, if I listen to him with an open heart, if I forgive quickly and ask for forgiveness even quicker, if I try to meet his needs as best I can, if I do little things every day to show him I love him, if I support his dreams with all the energy I can muster, if I give him loads of affection, if I tell him often how much I appreciate him, well, I’m halfway there.

It’s still not enough though.

I need God to get us the rest of the way. Our marriage needs God’s incredible, indescribable favor and grace. We need Him to wipe our dirty, chalky slates clean every morning. We need to pray to align our own selfish, narrow-minded wills with His will for our marriage. We need Him moving mountains: one pebble, one boulder, one obstacle at a time. We want to keep climbing steadily to new heights, not living complacently at basecamp.

We need us, but greater than that, we need God.

God designed this marriage. He did it for our good and for our pleasure. More so, He brought us together so we could be a blessing not just to each other but to the world.

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I don’t ever have to settle for an ordinary marriage. With God at the throne, in our home and at the very center of this marriage, there is nothing left for us to be but extraordinary.

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

Melissa Neeb

I'm a Minnesota native and lover of nature, WW2 memoirs, rescue dogs, photography, and thrifting. My husband and two teenagers are the great loves of my life. I am passionate about advocating for addiction recovery, writing about parenting, life, faith, and everything in between.