Back when I was a newlywed, I had a certain picture of what a wife’s role in the home was supposed to look like.
Specifically, I thought I needed to be the only one who did all of the cooking, cleaning, and decorating.
The only problem? I wasn’t skilled in any of those things. And guilt consumed me.
My husband, on the other hand, was an excellent chef, grew up with the best-housekeeper-of-a-mother I’ve ever met (and it rubbed off on him, big time), and he is naturally more artistic than I am.
My lack of self-confidance in these areas and the fact that my husband did know a thing or two about all three caused tension between us from the very first week we were married.
I will never forget the time he had been working on yard work all Saturday while I had been working inside on housework.
After he finished cutting the grass, he came inside and started vacuuming.
“Oh no you don’t!” I ran to his side and swiped away the vacuum cleaner. “That’s my job!”
“Huh?” was his reaction. “Why can’t I help you? We’re in this together.”
Not long after (it might have actually been the exact same day!), I ushered him out of the kitchen.
I was painstakingly trying to peel and cut potatoes, and I was doing it all wrong. He came to my side and tried to show me how to do it. I got embarrassed, flustered, and offended.
“Get out of my kitchen!” I exclaimed in no quiet tones. “Let me do the cooking!”
Now, over 12 years later, I’m ashamed at how I treated my husband back then.
He was just trying to help, and I was so consumed in my own imperfection that I lashed out on him–instead of being grateful that he knew how to do things that I didn’t and wanted to help me learn the ropes of keeping a home.
While there was a time when I felt like I must truly be the most humbled of all homemakers ever, I’ve come to realize that I was not alone in my feelings of inadequacy when it came to cooking, cleaning, decorating–and later motherhood and simply…life.
But what I’ve come to realize is that I was never alone in my imperfections.
In fact, I now believe that it’s in and through our imperfections that we can best see Jesus’s redemption of our weaknesses.
When we do learn how to do things “right,” we can see His hand in it, and we can know that it’s only through Him and His grace that we’re able to overcome our weaknesses.
My lack of cooking, cleaning, and decorating skills? Those weren’t my true weaknesses either.
You know what I was really weak in? Pride. Plain and simple. Pride.
I was prideful that I couldn’t do those things well and that my husband was more skilled in what I thoughtI should know how to do.
It took a humbling, but God has now taught me to appreciate how He’s gifted my husband, appreciate how He’s gifted me. I can learn to do things one step at a time–all while relying on Him.
Nowadays, my husband and I can laugh about me skirting him out of the kitchen and grabbing that vacuum cleaner out of his hands.
I hope that you, too, friend, can learn to let God strengthen your weaknesses and laugh at those silly imperfections as well.
When we learn how to embrace the imperfect you that God create you to be, you can discover the amazing that was there all along.
What are some areas where you feel not even close to amazing? How have you learned to trust God with our imperfections?