Friendships Right Now Are Hard But Worth It

“The kids woke up with a nasty cough. Let’s try for next week,” the message read.

It was the third time my best friend or I had canceled plans in as many weeks, and we were nearing a month of not seeing each other despite only living fifteen minutes apart.

“Works for me!” I texted back. I was disappointed, sure, but I understood completely because here’s the thing:

Friendships in this season of life are hard.

When you’re a mom of young kids who is friends with other moms of young kids, sometimes life just doesn’t line up. Kids are sick, or activities are scheduled, or work demands our attention, or we’re just too dang exhausted to make it out of the house with kids in tow.

Rainchecks occur more often than not, and despite our best intentions physically showing up for each other is practically impossible at times.

Over the last few years, my closest friendships have been sustained more through scattered text messages, GIFs, and memes than any face-to-face interaction. 

When we do meet up, our conversations are like a game of Red Light, Green Light as we respond to interruptions, change diapers, prepare snacks, and negotiate with our littles.

Yes, you may have more juice.
No, you may not climb on that.

Friendship during this season of life is hard, no doubt about it.
But it can also be really great.

In the past few years, I’ve found an authenticity in my friendships that was lacking before. I don’t have time for false pretenses or drama, and neither do they.

There’s a quiet comfort in the knowledge that life is just sort of messy—but we’re in the messiness together.

We can enjoy the familiarity of chatting over a cup of coffee in our sweatpants while the kids destroy the room next door, and we understand that canceled plans or stretches of absence aren’t personal, they’re just part of our current reality.

The treasured time we do get to spend together is focused on getting to the deep stuff. We’ve learned how to reach each others’ souls; how to ask the tough questions and support one another through anything.

In each other, we have someone to lean on, laugh with, and cry to when motherhood and wifehood and life overwhelm us.

Friendships during these years are hard, but oh, they are SO worth hanging onto.

To my dear friends who are in this with me—I’ll be seeing you.

Probably not tomorrow.

Maybe not even this week or month.

But I will be seeing you.

Just know that no matter how long it takes, I’ll be waiting for you on the other side of this season, just as I know you’ll be waiting for me.