Can I confess something? 

I’ve been giving myself a lot of grace lately. 

After all, I have three kids (and all their activities), 12 chickens, two cats, a dog, a rabbit, four side hustles, AND I homeschool. 

When I put it that way, it’s easy to understand how I might be exhausted both physically and mentally. It’s easy to play the grace card and let the laundry pile up for one more day (or week), or step over the scattered shoes and coats instead of picking them up, even though I’m on my way past the coat rack. 

It’s also easy to say I don’t have time to clean up even though I just spent two hours pinning No Fail Housekeeping Routines, and lurking on Facebook home management pages. 

The internet is super supportive of we moms who can’t quite keep it together. 

Wearing third-day yoga pants and a messy bun when you screech into the drop-off lane at the last minute? 

Casually shoving the laundry pile aside to give an unexpected guest a place to sit?

No problem!

That’s modern motherhood!

You’ve got your priorities straight!

You don’t have to try to impress us!

Really, you don’t. 

And you shouldn’t. 

But there is a line, guys, and I think I’ve crossed it. 

If I’m completely honest with myself, letting the clutter pile up, after a point, isn’t giving myself grace. It’s just lazy. 

It’s giving myself one more thing to feel anxious about and avoid. I look around at my gone-too-far messy house and feel even more tired and less motivated. So even though I have a few free minutes, which I could use to start a load of wash, or swish the toilet, I hop online to find my virtual support group. 

I can hear you loudly proclaiming that I shouldn’t feel guilty about my messy house, holding up your mug for a third-cup-of-coffee cheers to self-care. 

And I really, really appreciate it. 

But sometimes it’s not what I need. 

Sometimes I actually just need accountability. I need someone to tell me to get off my butt and vacuum. 

I do believe so much in self-care and giving grace, and I know that there are definite seasons when plenty of grace is in order if a mama is going to avoid making herself sick. I know this might not be a popular message. But letting things get to the point that the results of resting stress you out and make you feel worse than just pushing through the work would have isn’t good for you, either. 

When you’re in a season of needing grace, for goodness sake, take it! But if you’re like me and just need someone to tell you to get moving, I’m here for you. 

Fifteen minutes will get you a fairly clean bathroom.

Twenty minutes will get the scattered clothes at least into the laundry room.

An hour and you’ll start to recognize the place. 

You might even find yourself in there somewhere.

Get off your butt, Mama!


Magi likes to throw around the word "farm" when she talks about home. A more accurate description would be a rural half acre, where she and her husband try to grow good kids, good food, and good fun. Her work has been featured at Her View From Home, Project Hot Mess, and The Survival Mom. You can keep up with her adventures at and on Facebook.