Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

To the mother of my son’s future wife,

I’m in the midst of dirty diapers and temper tantrums, but I do have days where I think about the future and what it will look like for my son. I wonder who he will be, what he will do and probably most of all, who he will love.

I wonder about the type of woman he will bring home to meet us one day. I have my own thoughts on the type of person I wish my son would fall in love with, but we all know that the heart wants what it wants and we have to have faith that our children will take all we have instilled in them and bring it out into the world and, God-willing, apply them to the person they will choose to spend their life with.

With that being said, I want you to know that although I’m protective of my son’s heart and really do hope he will find someone who will treat his heart as precious, I do respect your role in this as the mother of my future daughter-in-law.

I understand that your baby girl is involved in this love that will form between our two children. I can wholeheartedly appreciate the fact that you have the same amount of worry, anticipation and hope in their relationship as I do. We are like two mirrors looking back at each other, each reflecting the other’s child as we watch their love bloom and become all that we both hoped it would be.

I want you to know that I would never try to take your place in your daughter’s heart. Some mother-in-laws try to work their way into the lives of the women their sons marry, pushing just a little too hard and not respecting the place there that already exists for their own mamas. However, I do hope I can form a special kind of bond with your daughter as time passes, and that I can be there for her when she needs a different point of view or another woman to talk to about things. I want her to feel comfortable coming to me with questions about my son that perhaps only a mama can know how to answer. Just as I hope my son will be open and honest with you, should he have any concern or questions about your daughter.

I look forward to the day when we will both share a grandbaby. From my own experience, I know there is nothing better than a grandma’s love. I hope we can form a partnership that will span our golden years as we both work hard to spoil the babies who will come from the love of our own babies. I want you to know that I will be there for the two of them, when they need some help getting that baby to sleep or need some time together. I hope you will do the same for them because they will both need us in those early days as new parents.

Just know that I will hold your daughter’s heart in the highest of regard, as I will teach my son to do as well.

He will be raised to cherish his wife, to treat her as a precious gem that needs protection but also room to shine. I hope that you will see this in the man he will become and the kind of husband I will teach he will be. I hope in return, you will treat him as an added son, because he is his father’s and my whole heart, too.

I’m so full of hope for the future, and I hope we get to be good friends as we walk together on the path of seeing our babies love someone else more than they love even us, and again as they become parents and we experience a new kind of love all over again.

Sincerely,
The mother of your future son-in-law

You may also like:

A Letter to My Future Daughter-In-Law While I Rock Your Husband

I’m Raising My Sons To Love Their Wives More Than They Love Me

Dear Future Daughter-In-Law, These Are My Promises to You

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Britt LeBoeuf

Britt is a married mother of two from northern New York. She has an undergraduate degree in Human Services. When she's not chasing down her two young children, she writes for sites such as Her View From Home, Scary Mommy, Filter Free Parents and Sammiches and Psych Meds. Check out her first published book, "Promises of Pineford" on Amazon too. On her blog, These Boys of Mine, she talks about parenting only boys, special needs parenting, mental health advocacy, being a miscarriage survivor and life as a crazy cat lady. 

They’re Amazing Grandparents but They Were Great Parents First

In: Grown Children, Motherhood
Grown woman with her parents

My parents are phenomenal grandparents. They are without a doubt my children’s favorite people. They show up to babysit with activities ready. They pick up the kids from daycare and go straight to the ice cream shop. They are the first ones to get on the floor and play cars or dress up when requested. They read the best bedtime stories and spend the extra few minutes tucking in tiny toes and kissing chubby cheeks. They’ve never missed an opportunity to spoil their grandbabies with too many toys and lots of love. But before they were the world’s best grandparents,...

Keep Reading

Mom Showed Me What It Means to Be a Caregiver

In: Grief, Grown Children, Loss
Grown woman with her mother smiling, color photo

My mother is an extraordinary woman. She inspires me to be a better person. She has spent seven years selflessly caring for my father after a horrific battle with Stage IV tongue cancer. During this time she would laugh with me, cry with me, and express her fears and frustrations with me. My mother is the definition of strength and courage while surrounded by heartbreak and human suffering. During the time my mother was taking care of my father she had her own health issues. Her colon perforated in 2012 making her critically ill. It’s nothing short of a miracle...

Keep Reading

There’s No Place on Earth More Full of Love than Grandma’s House

In: Grown Children, Living
Grandma helping little girl cook

I have this theory that every grandma’s house has its own smell. For mine, her house always smells like the same perfume she’s worn my whole life. I can’t tell you the name of her perfume, but I can tell you what it looks like and exactly where she keeps it on her bathroom cabinet. Occasionally the smell of freshly baked cookies overpowers the smell of her perfume at my grandma’s house. Knowing her signature recipes, I can tell you within a few seconds of walking in the door just exactly what she has in the oven. I imagine other grandmas’ houses smell...

Keep Reading

What a Blessing It Is to Be Your Other Mother

In: Grown Children, Motherhood
Mother-in-law with daughter-in-law in wedding dress, color photo

I remember the beautiful January day when I first caught a glimpse of you in your white lace dress. You were breathtakingly beautiful as we snapped a quick picture together. My heart swelled with pride, knowing you had trusted me to see your final preparations before walking down the aisle and marrying my son. That day, I gained another daughter, and you a mother. I know you didn’t need another mother; I agree that your own is pretty close to perfect, but I am grateful that you accepted me. Thank you for allowing me to stand beside you that day....

Keep Reading

When the Grandparents Are Still Working, Your Support System Looks Different

In: Grown Children, Motherhood
Child kissing grandma on cheek

I had my kids in my 20s, and yes it was hard, but probably not for the reason you think. People discourage you from having kids young because it could jeopardize your career, keep you from traveling, or eat into your savings, etc. For me, my kids are my world, and I don’t think I jeopardized anything by having them. They can travel with my husband and me. My savings account isn’t as cushioned as it was before I had my kids, but that doesn’t matter to me. The most difficult thing about having kids in my 20s is not having...

Keep Reading

Dear Dad, I Pray for Our Healing

In: Faith, Grief, Grown Children
Back shot of woman on bench alone

You are on my mind today. But that’s not unusual. It’s crazy how after 13 years, it doesn’t feel that long since I last saw you. It’s also crazy that I spend far less time thinking about that final day and how awful it was and spend the majority of the time replaying the good memories from all the years before it. But even in the comfort of remembering, I know I made the right decision. Even now, 13 years later, the mix of happy times with the most confusing and painful moments leaves me grasping for answers I have...

Keep Reading

Mom’s Special Recipe Means More This Year

In: Grown Children, Living
Bowl full of breadcrumbs and celery, color photo

Three weeks before Easter, my family and I stood in the hallway talking to a team of doctors whom we had flagged down. We were anxiously inquiring about my mom, who was in the ICU on life support. We hadn’t been able to connect with the doctors for over 48 hours, so it was important for us to check in and see what was going on. The head doctor began discussing everything they had observed in the scans and what it meant for my mom’s quality of life. Every word made our hearts break. The doctor continued to talk about...

Keep Reading

When Your Son Grows Up, You Will Remember This

In: Grown Children, Motherhood
Mother and son posing in older portrait, color photo

When your son turns 50, you will remember how, when he was a baby, he would kick the arm of the rocking chair just when you thought he was finally asleep and wake himself up for another 15 minutes of grinning and rocking. And you will smile at the memory. When your son turns 50, you will remember the endless walks through the neighborhood you took with him rain or shine because your husband had the only car for the family at work. You always visited the little wooden bridge that ran across a tiny stream, and he would jump...

Keep Reading

I’m So Lucky to Have Parents Like Mine

In: Grown Children, Living, Motherhood
Husband and wife, smiling, color photo

I was reminded recently that not everyone has parents like mine. I’ve always known it in theory, but seeing it around me is different. Getting to know and love people from different kinds of homes is eye-opening, and it made me realize something . . . I’m so lucky to have parents like mine. So, here’s to the parents who show up. The ones who work full time but still manage to make it to seemingly all your school functions, church outings, and sporting events. Here’s to the parents who took the time to sit down to dinner with you...

Keep Reading

In These Teen Years, I Wonder If I’m Doing Enough

In: Grown Children, Motherhood, Teen
Boy walking in the ocean surf

It’s a strange feeling to look back at all the years as a parent and wonder if I am doing enough. My boys are teens. One of them has just a few baby steps left until he heads into life after living under our roof. He is fiercely independent. One of those kids who I have for my whole life mistaken for being years older than he actually is. The kind of kid who can hold a conversation that reminds you of when you are out with your friends enjoying a bottle of wine at a restaurant made for middle-aged...

Keep Reading