Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

She sees me coming. A small wave from her house window and a silent invitation to come on over for our morning coffee. An unsaid invitation to connect with someone who gets the joys and challenges of being a mother. A quick, small, and valued break from life and stress and my house messes has become the perfect way to start the morning. A neighbor who has become a dear friend.

Prior to this encounter, alarm clocks were ringing, breakfast was made, backpacks were packed, and shoes were missing. School mornings are rough. Motherhood is rough. The world around us feels like it’s getting more and more challenging. Every morning I exhaustedly get all three of my kids ready for school and the world of motherhood feels isolating.

RELATED: It’s Lonely Feeling Invisible

I pour myself a cup of coffee in the morning and hit the ground running. Coffee that I hope to drink, but it sits on my countertop. Taking a minute or two to drink the coffee could mean school snacks aren’t loaded into the backpack or water bottles aren’t filled for school. The kids and I head to the bus stop sometimes with more complaining, another 200 requests, and missing jackets.

One morning three years ago after the bus left, I boldly asked, “Can I come in for a cup of coffee?” to a friendly neighbor. I hardly knew her. All I knew was that her son was in my son’s class. She had a kind heart. She loved God. She hesitantly said, “Sure, but just to warn you, my house isn’t clean.” Instantly I knew I had found my newest mom friend.

My friend’s house is conveniently located next to the bus stop. Her school-aged kids wait at the bus stop with my kids while she watches from the window with her baby. I remind her kids to not run in the street. She texts me that my son’s backpack is in the yard while he loads the bus. The bus pulls away and I wave at my kids and hers.

I excitedly walk over to my friend’s house and let myself in. Her baby greets me with his basketball and eagerly waits for me to throw him the ball. Her kitchen cabinet is stocked with my favorite coffee, the coffee pods I bought while grocery shopping with her. She laughs that I can use her coffee, but that would cost her a couple hundred dollars a year if so.

RELATED: Life Is Too Short for Fake Cheese and Fake Friends

It feels like a safe place to sit and chat about our kids, fun school projects in the works, and the struggles we’ve had as moms. Our conversations are both deep and surface-level. We have deep conversations about how to lead our kids to God and also what the cheapest but comfiest leggings are available.

I never thought I’d find someone to do life with at the bus stop. I never thought I’d invite myself into someone’s house for coffee. I never thought I’d find a forever friend at the bus stop, but I did.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Charissa Bates

Charissa is a Triple Negative Breast Cancer survivor at the age of 33. She has three beautiful children and works part-time as a mental health therapist. Writing has become empowering and therapeutic. Standstill: A Young Mom Conquering Triple Negative Breast Cancer will be available on her "Cancerversary" on December 12, 2022. Two other children’s books will be coming soon: We Find Joy (Cancer Messed with the Wrong Family) & The Traveling Book. Charissa runs https://www.facebook.com/FindingJoyPress and Salt Shaker Ministries. Also operates Busy Moms Need Jesus (facebook.com/busymomsneedjesus) with her friend, Abbey.

Give Me Friends Who Aren’t Keeping Up with the Joneses

In: Friendship, Living
Woman standing outside, color photo

Following trends is nothing new. Long before Kitsch curls and Lululemon belt bags, there were perms and, well, the original fanny packs. There’s been a constant, circulating rotation of must-buys for us to feel cool or relevant. And we women have been especially pressured to think we need these things to be accepted and part of the elusive village. Keeping up with the Joneses (or Kardashians for that matter) has just never been my thing. There are plenty of reasons why I’ll never be called a trendy girl: I can’t afford to be one. I lack the stylish eye required....

Keep Reading

Every Woman Needs a Friend For Life

In: Friendship, Living
Two friends outside laughing

There’s someone I need more than my husband. My husband indulges my dramatic stories, But she’ll ask me to tell it again. He knows what I want in my future. But she knows all the secrets of my past. RELATED: Good, Long Distance Friendship is Hard But Worth It We all need someone who will talk you back into the house when you swear you’re going to leave it. That’s who she is for me, and I need her. She stands with me on the ledge, not above it. She watches the kids so I can do a Target run....

Keep Reading

A Good Friend Doesn’t Make You Question Where You Stand With Her

In: Friendship, Living
friends sitting on a bench

We all want friends. (Even us introverts.) Friends are often a huge source of support, love and fun in our lives. God did something special when He made friends. Yet, I can’t help but notice how many people are worn down or even hurt by the friends in their life. Listen, every relationship will have its hard times. No friendship is perfect and there may be times when things get rocky. But there is a difference between disagreements and disrespect. There is a difference between a friend pointing out (in love) some concerns they have for you and friends who...

Keep Reading

Friendship is Easy With You

In: Friendship
two friends holding their babies smile

You know what I love? Friends who don’t make this friend thing complicated. People who don’t use the “you find out who your friends are” phrase passive-aggressively. I love friends who agree there’s no need for labeling. The thing is, there are limitations to the kind of friend I can be. Whoever says “it’s not hard to text back” obviously doesn’t have a brain turned to mush like me. So right now, more than ever, I’m thankful for friends who don’t have unrealistic expectations of me. I won’t always be a phone call away—sometimes I leave my phone inside so...

Keep Reading