So God Made a Teacher Collection (Sale!) ➔

Dear mom on the Zoom call,

I see you.

And not just in the “I see you because I am you” kind of way. I see you in the very real see you right there on my screen kind of way.

I see the oversized luggage under your eyes because you were up late last night trying to fit in the work that didn’t happen between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m.

I see the toddler wriggling on your lap everyone is oohing and ahhing over while you are attempting to maintain some semblance of professionalism and contribute to the conversation.

I see the side glances you are taking towards the door because you are trying to will your children to stop yelling about juice boxes since it will be your turn to speak soon and come off mute.

RELATED: This is Why Working Moms Are Stressed

I see you trying your absolute best while wondering how much longer you can keep this up. I know you are because I am, too​.

This isn’t easy, friends. It’s just not.

There are silver linings of course. The small ones and the big ones.

When you work from home with kids there is no commute to deal with, plus you can rock the business on the top/PJs on the bottom look and no one is the wiser. You don’t need to pack a lunch the night before, you can throw a load of laundry in at 11 a.m. instead of 11 p.m., and you can occasionally work from the comfort of your bed.​

Then, of course, the big silver linings. The huge silver linings. Like the safety of your home, the health of your family, and the extra time with the people in this world you love the most. 

But it’s still hard. And it’s OK to say it’s hard.

RELATED: I’m An Exhausted Working Mom and I’m Trying Harder Than You Know

Because right before you hopped on this Zoom call, in fact, 37 seconds before you hopped on this Zoom call, you were teaching letters to a preschooler or getting syrup out of a child’s hair. Or you were unsuccessfully trying to get Netflix to turn on faster, or refereeing a fight about straws.

And as soon as you get off this Zoom call, you are going to talk to your children again about what a closed office/bedroom/bathroom door means. You’ll feel bad about how strange this situation is for them, and feel guilty for getting frustrated.​

But on top of all that you’ll still need to follow up on what Sally said during that meeting because you’re pretty sure you’re supposed to be sending her an email? You couldn’t hear because someone not on this Zoom call invite was loudly announcing they had to pee.

It might feel like empty platitudes for me to tell you you’re doing a great job through all of this.

Sometimes you are going to feel like you’re doing a great job as a master juggler of all the things and other times you are going to feel like a human trash receptacle at the end of the day. A lady on the internet telling you you’re great isn’t going to change that.

RELATED: You Have Enough On Your Plate Right Now Mama, Don’t Add Guilt

For what it’s worth though, I do think we are all doing the very best we can in a trying situation. And if you and I are on a Zoom call together later today, I might try to give you an awkward wink of solidarity. Which everyone else will see because this is Zoom and not an in-person meeting so I will have just made things really weird.​

But that wink will still be worth it because you will feel seen, and everyone else will be judging me while you manage to scurry the small child not wearing pants out of the room undetected.

I suppose that’s the other silver lining.​

We’re all in this together.

Originally published on the author’s blog

Being a working mom is like running a never-ending marathon. We love the practical strategies in Stretched Too Thin for empowering working moms to get the most out of life. Don’t have time to sit and read? Listen here, on Audible.

Recommendations in this post contain affiliate links. Her View From Home may receive a small commission if you choose to purchase.

Becca Carnahan

Becca Carnahan is career coach, author, and mom from Massachusetts. Her writing combines funny and relatable parenting stories with career advice to make the whole process of finding or creating a career you love a lot more fun. Sign up for her weekly working mom newsletter at withlovebecca.com.

As Another School Year Begins, Remember Mama: You Know Your Child Best

In: Kids, Motherhood
little girl holding a first day of kindergarten sign

Dear mom buying school supplies and feeling overwhelmed, Stop and pray. Ask God to help you envision each child as the young adult they can be. Write out your goals for that child . . . fair warning, there will likely be very little academic success in your goals. You may even have to go back and write those in. Take a deep breath. Keep this list of goals nearby. Go back and read them when the world is telling you your child doesn’t stack up somewhere. They aren’t reading as fast, they’re not “getting” math, their handwriting is wonky,...

Keep Reading

Little Things Can Be Self Care Too

In: Motherhood
Woman reading a book

My third baby has never been a great night-time sleeper. Around eight months old, he decided to add more middle-of-the-night feedings. He went from his usual two nighttime nursing sessions to four, five, or even more. With all the wakeups, I was getting a dismal amount of sleep. My lack of sleep led to low energy, low patience, and an overall low mood. I was constantly tired and grumpy. When playing with my kids, I would feel like I was in a fog. I was not able to enjoy their silliness or creativity but instead became easily annoyed and frustrated....

Keep Reading

I’m Done Feeling Guilty for Struggling with My Mental Health

In: Living, Motherhood
Woman walking down a sunny road

My mental health hasn’t been great for the past week. I couldn’t put my finger on what was going on, I just knew I was struggling. My whole body felt like I was squeezing, holding in the building tension of life, trying not to burst on innocent bystanders in my path. It took me days to finally clue in that it was my anxiety, a handful of little things combining to create a perfect storm. The endless cycle of sickness hitting my family, parenting pressure, and pain from past trauma. In retrospect, I guess it wasn’t little things at all,...

Keep Reading

Dear Overstimulated Mama, You Need Rest

In: Motherhood
Woman resting head on wall

To the overstimulated mama, I know you used to be a person who loved singing and dancing, games and riotous dinner parties with friends and family. You probably had the energy for a fun evening and loved to cuddle with your man. I’m sure your outfits used to bedazzle and your hair and makeup would make you feel like a million bucks. Oh, how times have changed. Now, a Friday night on the couch is the most coveted activity after a week of little hands all over you, pulling, dragging, squeezing. Your kids keep most of the cuddles you used...

Keep Reading

Trying To Conceive Almost Ruined Our Marriage

In: Baby, Marriage, Motherhood
Man and woman back to back on bed

“I know it’s not true, but I feel like you don’t love me anymore.” My husband’s words caused me to freeze in my tracks. I had been on my way out the door, but as soon as those words were uttered, I knew I wasn’t going anywhere. The words hung in the air, and I held my breath, mind racing. What could I possibly say to that? I slowly turned around, silently waiting for my husband to continue. Which he did. “I feel like you don’t want to have sex with me anymore.” I cringed internally. Clearly, I wasn’t the...

Keep Reading

Every Time the Doctor Says, “It’s a Girl!” My Heart Grows a Little More

In: Kids, Motherhood
Sisters sitting on park bench

When I’m in the grocery store with my girls, I always get comments. My oldest girls are walking near the cart with my two-year-old running up and down the aisles. “Three little girls! Wow! God bless you, Momma!” Then they look in my cart and see the car seat holding my nine-month-old. “Is that a baby boy in there?” “No, another girl!” I reply. I get a variety of responses when people realize I have four girls under the age of seven. “Wow, you’ve got your hands full!” “Going to try for a boy?” “You are truly blessed—your girls are...

Keep Reading

When Your Last Baby Goes to School

In: Child, Motherhood

In just a few short weeks, our daughter will start preschool.  On Monday and Wednesday mornings, she’ll sling her little backpack over her shoulders, pull on her tie-dye sneakers, and head out the door. If you ask her about it, she’ll get a big grin on her face and tell you how excited she is. But me? While I’m ready for her to go and fully confident she’ll thrive, my stomach has also been doing flip-flops at the thought. Because she’s our youngest. Our little. Our last. If you’ve been here before, you know: When your last baby goes to...

Keep Reading

Raising a Child with a Severe Food Allergy Affects the Whole Family

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little boy looking at ice cream cone

I saw something recently that said, “It’s National Ice Cream Day today!” and I cannot stop thinking about it. Now I know that sounds silly, but as a mom of a child with a severe dairy (and egg) allergy, I must admit at times it makes me sad (and more often jealous if I’m being completely honest) when I know my son is going to miss out on another fun or “normal” thing that other kids his age are experiencing, like actual ice cream and ice cream parties. If I continue to be honest, I get jealous when I see...

Keep Reading

So You’re Not the Fun Parent…So What?

In: Kids, Marriage, Motherhood
Woman reading book while two play in background

I’m not the fun parent in our household. Of course, this comes as no surprise to me but it still stung when my 8-year-old said to me rather bluntly the other night, “Daddy’s way more fun than you.” And while the rational part of my brain knows better than to take this kind of comment to heart, my super-sensitive, highly emotional primitive brain did the exact opposite and ran with it.  Daddy is the more fun parent. I’m the stricter, more rigid, and more uptight parent. I’m not the type of parent who, in the spur of the moment, will...

Keep Reading

The Rollercoaster of Foster Care and Adoption

In: Living, Motherhood
Mother daughter photo on beach

After spending most of their childhoods in foster care, Addy and her brother Dominick had never been to a birthday party or down a water slide. They missed out on many childhood staples, but it was the least of their concerns. Addy was riddled with anxiety and panic attacks—crippled with fear that she would age out of the system before getting adopted. She carried a backpack full of anxiety fidgets to cope with her uncertain years in foster care. She had such a bad case of TMJ that the kids at school mocked her for adjusting her jaw every ten...

Keep Reading

Get our FREE phone wallpaper to encourage you as the new school year begins

It's bittersweet for a mother to watch her child grow—but you both are ready to soar.