Our Baby Lives With Jesus Now

A Gift for Mom! 🤍

To our baby who is in the presence of Jesus:

There have been days I’ve sat down and longed for the sting of losing you to go away, but the truth is it never will. I’ve cried many bitter tears over the years after miscarrying you. Nothing makes that piece in my heart that was yours any better even though we know you’re in the presence of Jesus and there is absolutely no better place to be.

We now have a home full of siblings who would’ve loved to welcome you, but God had other plans for you.

It’s still hard to wrap my mind around how excited yet nervous we were to be pregnant. Thinking how much more love would be filling our home soon.

RELATED: Dear Kids, Your Siblings Are a Gift For Life

We told a few of our close family members, and they were excited to have another sweet baby around, too.

A few weeks went by, and it was time for a doctor’s appointment. Nerves were running high just as normal—little did we know, you weren’t going to make it.

There have been many things through life that have been hard, but this was unbearable.

Going in pregnant just as we thought but knowing you would be taken from us was the hardest news we’ve ever received.

RELATED: A Mother’s Love Can’t Be Measured In Weeks

There have been tears cried silently when no one knew and tears when I was supposed to be happy about life.

The truth is, as the Bible says in the book of Job, the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.

RELATED: Even When Your Arms Are Empty, God is Still Good

It’s a good place to be where the Lord can give you peace to endure the heartbreak of losing a baby, an innocent human who never got a chance to live in this world.

But oh, how that baby is living now, in the sweet, Holy presence of Jesus.

Though we love you and wish many things could’ve been different, God had a plan we can’t yet comprehend, but there will come a day we will hold you forever.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

baby in heaven Faith heaven jesus loss miscarriage pregnancy pregnancy loss with Jesus

Kaela Ward

My name is Kaela Ward. I am a 29 year-old Christian. Also, a wife of seven years—the good Lord has blessed us with three beautiful babies.

I Lost My Sight at 16—But It Wasn’t the End of My Vision

In: Faith

After my father shot me, I lay in a hospital bed, and my world went dark. I was 16 years old. The injury left me completely blind. But the darkness didn’t stop there. As my physical sight disappeared, something else came into focus—the depth of the wounds I had carried long before that moment, wounds I had never fully allowed myself to see. For years, I had learned how to survive without asking too many questions. I had learned how to minimize what hurt, how to explain things away, how to keep moving forward as if everything were normal. But...

Keep Reading

Ministry Starts Inside Your Own Four Walls

In: Faith

When people hear the word ministry, they often think of missionaries, or the pastor who preaches every Sunday, but in our home, ministry belongs to all of us—even our kids. Growing up, I didn’t think of myself as a ministry kid. Still, when my dad packed our old Astro for the summer and we all piled in, we were on mission. Each kid had a part to play in my dad’s evangelical magic shows (yes, you read that right!). My brother would juggle, my older sister sang, my middle sister flipped the projector slides that shone pictures of Jesus on...

Keep Reading

These Holy Small Things

In: Faith, Motherhood

My 8-year-old-daughter has recently taken up sewing, to my simultaneous delight and chagrin. My delight because I too love sewing; my chagrin because her enthusiasm often outpaces my own abilities, namely, in the undertaking of tedious projects with no pattern. Take, for example, the cloth doll diaper we designed and stitched up together. Granted, the design was fairly basic to draw up and scale. But the minuscule nature of the work, both for my hands and head, was enough to throw me into existential questioning. It was one of those moments when you wonder how the sum of your life...

Keep Reading

Life Lessons from My Grown Children

In: Faith, Motherhood

“Don’t limit a child to your own learning, for he was born in another time.” – Rabindranath Tagore Quietly communing with a loved one in the early morning hours is such an intimate and precious time. Visiting with one’s grown child when all is dark and still is one of life’s purest pleasures. I remember the conversation clearly. My daughter’s husband, small children, and father were all asleep as we whispered and chatted. She and I are both fidgeters by nature, unable to be still for long. This inner restlessness must be remedied, and we are compelled by biology to...

Keep Reading

My Prayer Is Simple Now: “I Believe; Help My Unbelief.”

In: Faith

I have spent most of my life in faith. Not circling it or analyzing it from a distance, but inside it—learning its language before I even realized I was learning it, shaping myself around it in ways that felt as natural as breathing. I was raised in Christian Science, which is a very particular kind of faith. It’s not really about “believing” in the way most people think. It’s about understanding. Aligning your thoughts with what is ultimately true about God and reality. If you can understand rightly, you can be well. If you can see clearly, healing follows. So...

Keep Reading

Your Worth Is Not Someone Else’s To Measure

In: Faith, Living

Insecurity is something we all carry in one form or another. For me, it has probably always looked confident and outgoing from the outside. But internally, it can feel heavy, complicated, and exhausting at times. And when someone comes along whose behavior reinforces those insecurities, it amplifies what was already there. There was someone I had hoped to genuinely connect with, but it was clear from the start that the feeling wasn’t mutual. From the beginning, their wall was up. No matter how kind I tried to be or how carefully I showed up, it never came down. Their distance...

Keep Reading

Lord, Give Me Faith Like Hannah

In: Faith

Woman walking in field with hand in wheat

Hannah knew what it was like to feel forgotten. She often clutched her empty womb and thought Surely the Lord has forgotten me. She knew the bitter sting of feeling isolated and alone. She knew the anguish of praying day after day after day and seeing no fruit, not even a bud, from her faithfulness. Hannah knew what it was like to feel like the weight of the world was on her, and her hope may have dwindled. Even those around her did not offer encouragement. Quite the opposite—they did their best to sow seeds of discouragement. Yet Hannah pressed...

Keep Reading

God Carries Me Through the Deep Waters of Change

In: Faith, Living, Motherhood

“Ahhh!” My underwater scream garbled in my snorkel tube as the manta ray’s cavernous mouth swept a hand’s distance from my face. My fingers tightened around the surfboard until my knuckles ached. My arms trembled. I jerked my head side to side, searching for my daughters, Mia and Megan. Recent college graduates, they had joined me on one last mother-daughter vacation before launching their adult lives. They floated easily on the vibrant Hawaiian water, relaxed, trusting. I wanted to borrow their calm. Earlier, our guide had explained that the LED lights built into the surfboard attracted plankton the way college...

Keep Reading

Faith After a Rare Disease Diagnosis

In: Faith, Motherhood

My pastor frequently speaks of “kid pain” and acknowledges there’s nothing like it. I can testify to that. After nine months of uncertainty and unexplained issues following the birth of our now 4-year-old daughter, Harlow, we finally received her diagnosis of Pyruvate Dehydrogenase Complex Deficiency (PDCD), a life-limiting mitochondrial disease with no cure and no FDA-approved treatments. It was heartbreaking. In moments like these, a parent can fall into complete desperation. You go through a range of emotions almost too fast to name: fear for your child’s life; anxiousness about how much time you’ll get with them; overwhelming grief. And...

Keep Reading

What If I Don’t Hear God’s Voice?

In: Faith

There have been many times over the years when I’ve heard others share stories of how the Lord spoke to them or gave them a sign. Seashells scattered along a sandy beach, numbered to represent how many children they would have. A quiet walk in the park, followed by a clear sense that another little one was coming. What a blessing, I think, when I hear and read their stories. I often wonder how much more faith they must have than I do—to know with such certainty that what they heard was truly God speaking. I listen, I smile, and...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, Thank You For Being a Man Who Steps Up

Marriage

Dear Husband, Thank You For Being a Man Who Steps Up

Ten Awesome Sports Movies That Will Make You Laugh, Cry, and Stand Up to Cheer

Kids

We now have a home full of siblings who would’ve loved to welcome you, but God had other plans for you.

RELATED: Dear Kids, Your Siblings Are a Gift For Life

RELATED: A Mother’s Love Can’t Be Measured In Weeks

RELATED: Even When Your Arms Are Empty, God is Still Good

But oh, how that baby is living now, in the sweet, Holy presence of Jesus.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Kaela Ward

I Lost My Sight at 16—But It Wasn’t the End of My Vision

Ministry Starts Inside Your Own Four Walls

These Holy Small Things

Life Lessons from My Grown Children

My Prayer Is Simple Now: “I Believe; Help My Unbelief.”

Your Worth Is Not Someone Else’s To Measure

Lord, Give Me Faith Like Hannah

God Carries Me Through the Deep Waters of Change

Faith After a Rare Disease Diagnosis

What If I Don’t Hear God’s Voice?

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

Our Baby Lives With Jesus Now

We now have a home full of siblings who would’ve loved to welcome you, but God had other plans for you.

But oh, how that baby is living now, in the sweet, Holy presence of Jesus.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

I Lost My Sight at 16—But It Wasn’t the End of My Vision

Ministry Starts Inside Your Own Four Walls

These Holy Small Things

Life Lessons from My Grown Children

My Prayer Is Simple Now: “I Believe; Help My Unbelief.”

Your Worth Is Not Someone Else’s To Measure

Lord, Give Me Faith Like Hannah

God Carries Me Through the Deep Waters of Change

Faith After a Rare Disease Diagnosis

What If I Don’t Hear God’s Voice?

Previous Post

Next Post

You May Also Like