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Is she even watching her child?

Did she really just give him a treat right after he misbehaved?

He goes to bed when?

Parenting. Everyone has an opinion on it.

On the other side of those critiques is a self-conscious mom always questioning her abilities because of others who are shaming moms. She is really sitting on the couch each night contemplating the way her day went and what she would change about what she said to her child.

So why exactly are we so hard on other mamas?

Is it because we are bored? I am not really sure how you are bored if you are raising children considering I cannot find a minute to myself throughout the day, but if you have spare time, more power to you, but, please, for the love of other mothers, please stop using this time to shame others! There are plenty of other less harmful things to do when we are bored.

I know, like me, you cannot take another thing going wrong. It is a chore just to get everyone up in the morning and get them dressed and ready to go without feeling like a bomb is about to explode in our house! Why can we not love each other through our beautiful mess instead of telling each other we are doing it all wrong?

I understand there may be drama and you might get angry at another mama. You may be angry at your own children and take it out on other moms, but can we stop yelling at one another and making each other feel like dirt because we are not raising our children all the same ways?

Jealous much? Yeah, I see you mommy with no stretch marks, wearing you tiny bikini at the pool. I see you mom of 7 children who seems to have it all together, when I can barely make it through the grocery store without have to scream at my children ONE. MORE. TIME. to stop touching each other. I see you crafty mommy, who brings your super cute lunches with amazing notes and always helping out with holiday parties and all of your super fun ideas. I see you, but I am proud of you. Good for you that you can wear your bikini! I wish I could! You have accomplished a great feat by even looking like you have it all together with 7 little ones. You are such a fun mom with all your crafts and amazing ideas! Let us celebrate each other’s awesomeness instead of hating each other in petty jealousy.

Have you lost your own identity in being a mama? Motherhood is hard. We can get lost in it. Maybe it helps you to feel better about yourself to tear another mama down. Well, stop putting others down and figure out what kind of parent you really want to be. If you want to be noticed, be a rockstar mom instead of telling others where they can improve.

At the end of the day, we all want the same things for our children-we want them to be healthy, happy and know they are loved. So let us make a pact to each other as mamas to stop shaming each other. It hurts. Are you ready to make the pact to only share kind words with other moms? I would love to hear some positive stories of how you share kindness with other mothers out there that are trying to survive this journey, just like you and me.

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Brittany Dyer

Brittany is a counselor turned missionary living in Bangkok, Thailand. She married her high school sweetheart and now has 2 beautiful children with him. She loves to travel, bake, eat ice cream and have dance parties with her kiddos! Follow her blog at 

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