I sat with my friend, both of us in our sweatpants and messy buns with our legs curled up on my couch. She was wiping the tears from her eyes as mine began to fall, too. Her words had been all too familiar.
“I’m sorry, it’s just so hard right now, isn’t it?” I said.
She sniffled and sobbed into her sleeve as she nodded her head in agreement. She had three under three, and I had three under five and we were tired, frumpy, hungry, and emotional. I reached across the couch and grabbed her hand; there we were, both drowning in the trenches of motherhood, but we both knew that beyond the tears there was something deeper.
Isn’t that what we really want, friends? For someone to see us in our mess, to meet us in our tears, to grab our hand and agree that it’s hard? For someone to acknowledge our deep sense of constant reliance from our tiny people and to admit they too know the defeat of exhaustion.
But what we really want is for someone to also know that even in all of that, we were meant for this. That we were made to do these hard things. We want someone to look us in the eyes and understand that the weight of this job isn’t more than the love that we have for our children. That even in our long days and even longer nights, in the sandwich making and tiny finger nail clipping, and yes even in the tantrums and crying and bottle washing, this is what we were made for.
To put on our brave faces and be the moms our children need us to be.
To cling to Jesus and trust He will mold us into who He desires us to become.
To fight for the hearts of our children.
To fight for the hearts of ourselves.
From the first sleepy-eyed cuddles in the morning to the lunch they won’t dare to touch in the afternoon, and all the way into the craziness of bedtime and into the up at all hours of the night meetings. We were made for each of them.
There are going to be days we don’t see our purpose. There are going to be seasons we feel like the enemy is winning. There are even going to be days we find ourselves asking if we’ve lost who we are. But don’t you give into those lies, mama friend. On the contrary, you’ve found who you were destined to become. And you’re sitting right here next to me on the couch—tired, frumpy, hungry, emotional, and strong.
Yes, it is hard. Yes, it is relentless. And yes, some days the weight of it is almost too much to bear. But that is when you have become her.
You have become the woman who was made to do the hard things. You have transformed into the champion of your family’s hearts. I have become her. We have become her.
You have become a mother.
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