If the global pandemic has taught me anything at all, I’ve learned it’s OK to say no. I do not have to justify to anyone my reasoning for saying no.

No is a complete sentence and an answer.

I used to let the overwhelming possibility of missing out on life keep me from saying no. Well, not anymore. Now that I have barely left my house for almost four months, I’ve discovered I can miss out on stuff and (gasp!) still survive.

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I still have friends. I’m still happy. I’ve realized my kids don’t know, or even care, what they’re missing if they never knew it was on the table in the first place.

I was the one who held that weight on my shoulders—weight I put there myself.

Don’t want another thing on your weekly to-do list? Don’t sign your kid up for that activity.

Say no to the demanding child. It won’t kill them. That’s right, I said it. Let them pitch the fit in the middle of Target over being told a big, fat no. I guarantee more women will be staring at you because of your guts than due to your crying kid.

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Stand up for the way you choose to parent. Don’t let someone else belittle you, make you feel less than, or question what you’re doing. You are your child’s parent. Own it and don’t let people try to convince you otherwise. On the flip side, if you do make a mistake, then own that, too. Our kids deserve apologies the same as adults.

If you’re tired, then say no.

You don’t have to go to every girl’s night. You don’t have to meet up with family every single time they extend the invite. You don’t need to feel guilty if you don’t want to go to the park with your kids. Stay home in the AC all day and watch what it does for your soul.

You don’t have to do all the traveling for every. single. holiday. Do not do this to yourself. Roads run in all directions. People can come see you, too. If they don’t, then maybe that one’s on them?

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Don’t want to cook dinner? Then say no. Tell the kids (and the big kid—ahem, I mean husband) to fend for themselves. Let them have cereal or frozen waffles or whatever they like. They’ll probably love you more for it anyway.

Do not let the weight of saying no hold you down. If anything, saying no just might free you.