Recently I was posed a question: “How in your life have you experienced the grace of God?”

Immediately, my heart swelled with an experience that stands out above all others. 

Three years ago, I found out I was pregnant with my first child. My husband and I were ecstatic about becoming parents. Unfortunately, our joy was short-lived.

We soon realized something was wrong, and after weeks of doctor’s appointments, tests, and misdiagnoses, we were told the pregnancy was ectopic

The delay in diagnosis meant my health was at risk and the day we saw the heartbeat for the first time was the last time my baby was a part of me. 

I was rushed into emergency surgery and woke up with a piece of me forever missing.

The following months were a blur—more doctor’s visits, more tests, more decisions to be made. Since I also lost a fallopian tube in the surgery, I was told my odds of naturally conceiving were low and that IUI or IVF were my best options for becoming pregnant.

We decided to try IUI. After months of appointments, injections, and waiting we received a positive pregnancy test result. It ended in an early miscarriage.

I couldn’t understand the purpose of so much pain and loss and decided I needed a break. A break to let my body and heart heal.

During this time my husband and I attended an adoption seminar along with looking into natural fertility methods.

We decided to book an appointment with another fertility specialist, this one with a focus on a natural and holistic approach to infertility.

The afternoon of the doctor’s visit I decided to go for a walk and clear my head. It was a beautiful day with a bright blue sky, white puffy clouds floating by and the heat of the sun warming the temperature to near perfection.

Despite my surroundings, inside I was a mess.

The past few months had taken a toll on me mentally, physically, and spiritually. Instead of turning toward my faith in my time of despair, I turned away. Yet, at that moment, something inside me told me to talk to God. 

I asked point-blank, “God, what should I do?”

The answer was as crystal clear as the day before me: “Adopt.”

At that moment, everything fell into place, and my heart felt at peace. 

Without a doubt, I knew we were meant to become parents through adoption. I immediately called my husband and told him God had spoken to me and I was canceling the fertility appointment. He asked if I was sure. I told him I was positive.

He suggested we go out to dinner that night to talk everything over, and we went to our favorite restaurant, a tiny spot near our house. 

As we chatted, we realized we had both been thinking about adoption for a while but were unsure if it was truly what the other person wanted. We talked about the emotions involved, the money involved, and the process it would take to get there.

Shortly into our meal, a couple came over with their little boy, and while they looked familiar, we couldn’t quite place them. The woman said, “Hi, we were on the adoptive family panel at the adoption seminar you attended.”

We talked a bit more and learned they lived on the other side of town. They had just come from an appointment in the area and decided to get dinner instead of sitting in rush hour. They had never heard of the restaurant but decided to try it. 

I sat there after we said our goodbyes and felt tears spring to my eyes. Not only did God answer my question, He reaffirmed his answer. There were no words to express the glory and grace of His presence and I just sat there smiling and crying. 

There was no question in our minds, we would grow our family through adoption.

Exactly one year after the anticipated due date of our first child, our son was born. The moment we saw him we knew he was meant to be our son.

He recently celebrated his first birthday and we thank God every day for showing us the path we were meant to take to become parents. God’s grace is evident every time I look at my little boy, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

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Adoption Is Love

To My Adopted Baby: You Saved Me

Laura Niebauer Palmer

Laura lives in Austin with her husband and son where she enjoys writing, being involved in her local church and attempting to find the perfect chocolate chip recipe! She has written for Chicken Soup For The Soul, Scary Mommy and The Penny Hoarder along with sharing her adoption story on her blog.