Pre-Order So God Made a Mother

Dear waiting adoptive parent,

I see you as you check your phone and e-mail too many times a day, wondering if you missed any messages from the adoption agency about potential matches for you.

I see you when you finally take your mind off of the waiting for a while, only to have someone ask if you have heard anything from the adoption agency. You know they are trying to be supportive  You just wish they realized you will tell them when you have news.

I see you as you wonder who you should tell you are waiting for adoption, or if you get a match. If you have an adoption match that doesn’t go through, you don’t want to go through the pain of answering questions from lots of people.

I see you as you wonder what you can commit to. Can you really go out of town for a vacation a few months from now? What about that volunteer opportunity that is a full year commitment? You don’t want to put your life on hold, but what if you get the call you have an adoption match soon?

I see you when you are feeling guilty. You are hoping so badly to be matched with a baby and for an adoption to go through. At the same time, you recognize if you become a parent through adoption, it is because your child’s birth mom and dad were in a situation where they were unable to raise a child. You know that if they figure out a way to parent and the adoption falls through, it is a huge blessing for them. It’s just that your heart is so fragile after all you’ve been through waiting for a baby, whether it be through failed infertility treatments, miscarriages, adoptions that didn’t work out, or a combination of any of those. You don’t know if you can handle one more disappointment.

I see you wondering how you are going to get everything done if you get an adoption quickly. Truth be told, all adoptions are quick. Whether you match early on in the pregnancy or after the child is born, at any time up until the birth parents make their final decision, this adoption may not go through. You haven’t been stocking your house with baby items like you would during a pregnancy, because you can’t bear the thought of going through returns or having them sit around your house as a reminder of what could have been if you don’t bring home a baby.

I see you wondering if you are strong enough for this journey if you are blessed to adopt a little one. You know no matter how much your sweet little child loves you, he or she will have questions one day. You hope and pray you will be able to answer them all in a way that gives them comfort, but know there likely will be questions you may not be able to answer.

I also see that God did make you strong enough or you wouldn’t be on this journey. He put adoption in your heart because he knew you were capable. He knows the love you have to give and how brave you are to be taking on this unknown journey.

I see why the adoption agency you are working with also saw you are a great fit for adoption. Do you remember all the work you did for your home study? All the classes, paperwork, references, home visits, and interviews? They spent a lot of time making sure you were a fit for this journey.

I see how you carry hope in your heart every day. You know that today could be the day you get that match call that changes your life forever.

Most of all, I see what a wonderful parent you will make.

You may also like:

To My Adopted Baby: You Saved Me

3 Things We Learned While Waiting For Our Adopted Child

4 Things a Birth Mom Wants Adoptive Families To Know

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available for pre-order now!

Pre-Order Now

Kimberly Keys

Kimberly is a stay-at-home Mom to her precious son who joined our family through the miracle of adoption. She loves watching her toddler discover new things, especially when exploring the parks around her hometown of Cleveland, Ohio. Besides being published on Her View From Home, she's also written about her experience from her twelve year IT career for Zapier as a freelance writer for their blog.

There’s So Much I Didn’t Know About Having a Daughter

In: Motherhood
Mother and daughter hug

I started my motherhood journey as a boy mom. I knew the names of all the construction trucks, I could build a LEGO set in record time, and nothing said about a penis could ever shock me. I could play in the dirt, tie on a Superman cape, and have a lightsaber fight all before naptime. But when I was expecting again, I saw that sweet little face on the ultrasound, and I knew—even before the ultrasound tech made the announcement—that my days as solely a boy mom were about to come to an end. I was so excited to...

Keep Reading

Exclusively Pumping Makes You One Strong Mother

In: Motherhood
Breast pump with bottles, black-and-white photo

Dear exclusively pumping mama,  Oh, how I see you, sweet mama. (I’ve been you—twice now, as a matter of fact.)  I see you frustrated with your body and feeling like it’s failed you because you’re not able to nurse your baby. Maybe your baby is in the NICU and you feel robbed of this experience. Or maybe, due to other circumstances, you haven’t been able to make it work.  RELATED: I Exclusively Pumped for a Year—And My Baby and I Thrived I see you tirelessly getting up before the baby does in the middle of the night so you can...

Keep Reading

Yes, We Wanted a Big Family

In: Kids, Motherhood
Big family silhouette

Baby number WHAT?!?! Okay, okay, I know having FIVE children in the modern world is a bit of an anomaly, but the responses we have gotten from sharing our joyful (to us!) news has been a bit over-the-top. You see, my husband and I always dreamt of a big family, verbally expressing four to five children as our ultimate number. After having three, I must say I had to do some convincing to keep going, as my husband felt our hands were pretty full. I do agree our hands were pretty full, but I still felt our hearts could handle...

Keep Reading

How Much Longer Will I Watch Them Play?

In: Kids, Motherhood, Tween
Two boys at indoor playground, color photo

As I sit here watching my two boys running around on the bright-colored foam mats, sliding down the bright red and green slides that end up in a ball pit full of giggles, I can’t help but wonder how much longer I will enjoy this sight. They’re both growing up so fast—T-shirts with their favorite characters have been replaced by plain colors.  Curtains with Paw Patrol now invite an “Eww, cringe!” reaction. Slowly their boy bedroom decor has been updated to reflect the cool gamers they so want to be. RELATED: He’s a Boy For Just a Little While Longer No...

Keep Reading

The Quiet Work You’re Doing Matters, Mama

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother and two girls playing on bed

Mid-morning light spills through the kitchen window as I stand at the sink washing dishes.  “Mom, Caleb just punched me!” 3-year-old Aiden calls from the living room. “He took the remote right out of my hands!” Caleb contends. “I saw the whole thing happen,” their big sister interjects. “It was totally Caleb’s fault.  He started the whole thing.” “Mind your own business!” Caleb barks as he charges toward his sister with his fist in the air. It takes every ounce of restraint I can muster, but I manage not to get sucked into the yelling match happening in front of...

Keep Reading

I Don’t Belong In the Baby Section Anymore

In: Motherhood

I don’t belong here anymore. The thought crept into my mind today as I stood in the baby section. I was there to grab a gift for an expecting friend, but as I looked around at the old familiar shelves, I was hit with a wave of emotion.  Because it’s true—I don’t belong here anymore. There was a time when this aisle was my most frequented on trips to Target. As a pregnant twentysomething with a growing belly, I would hold up outfit after outfit and wonder what our baby would look like. Who would he or she be? As...

Keep Reading

To the Parents Raising My Child’s Future Spouse

In: Faith, Motherhood
Little boy lying on car seat with puppy, color photo

Oh, hey there friend, you don’t know me yet or maybe you do, but at least for now neither of us know that our children will one day commit their lives to each other and by doing so forever knit our families together. One day, we will all sit in the front aisles of a church filled with scores of people who have influenced our babies, but none like us. No one else in that church will know the intentionality, love, and grace of God that it took to reach that day, but we will. The work you are doing...

Keep Reading

Loving Mom (Thanks, Amazon)

In: Grief, Living, Motherhood
Woman and mother smiling, color photo

I was online, searching old Amazon orders for a part we’d bought for our 1998 Buick Regal. The car was Mom’s. She’d given it up at 86 after I said her grandsons would be grateful to use it. She’d laughed with delight as Gabe, newly licensed, pulled away from her place in her Buick, heading home to California. It was a good car, but the original parts were wearing out. That’s why I scrolled through my orders, to see which window pulley assembly we’d purchased last time. As I scrolled, I was struck by all the gifts I’d ordered for...

Keep Reading

Supporting Your Teen through Freshman Year

In: Motherhood, Teen, Tween
Mom and teen boy

Growing up I remember seeing Ms. Honey in the movie Matilda and thinking teaching must be a magical job if Ms. Honey could do it so effortlessly. This image of dancing with my students, heart-to-heart conversations, and the perfectly curated teacher outfit always stuck in my mind. When I decided to become a teacher, my original goal was to teach elementary. I wanted to be that driving force that helped those pudgy little hands learn how to write, sing at the top of their lungs about the seasons, and be there to help with scraped knees. Over the years I...

Keep Reading

Donna Kelce Is Living the Boy Mom Dream: Her Two Sons Will Face Off in the NFL’s Biggest Game

In: Living, Motherhood
Donna Kelce in split Philadelphia Eagles and Kansas City Chiefs jersey

How many millions of brothers have grown up playing football against each other in their backyards? It’s impossible to know, really—but if you had brothers or are raising boys, you’ve probably seen a few of those pick-up games yourself.  Sometimes, the little boys tossing around the pigskin grow up to realize the dream of playing in the NFL. In Donna Kelce’s case, that dream became a reality times two: son Jason Kelce plays center for the Philadelphia Eagles, and son Travis Kelce is a tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs. And in two weeks time, those two teams—and Donna’s...

Keep Reading