Naptime—the sacred, uninterrupted period of time when I can focus on accomplishing at least some of my to-do list.
Usually my 2-year-old goes down without issue but not that day.
That day he was in a mood.
He was missing a stuffed animal.
He didn’t like his blanket.
He wanted his closet door open, he wanted it closed.
These seemingly small issues worked him up to the point where he was uncontrollably crying—the blubbering, can’t catch your breath type of crying.
Nothing calmed him.
As I approached his crib he said, “Momma, down.”
I asked if he wanted a hug and he said no.
He repeated, “Momma down.”
I asked if he wanted to be tucked in and he said no.
He again requested, “Momma, down.”
So I laid down on the floor next to his crib.
While the tears still flowed and his breathing remained heavy, he finally put his head down.
A few seconds later he lifted his head to make sure I was still there.
As he turned to me, I reassured him I was still by his side.
A bit more time passed and he popped up again, his brown eyes seeking mine. Satisfied I hadn’t gone anywhere, he once again rested his head.
As I lay on the floor, I thought of all the things I needed to get done from catching up on work emails to dinner preparation.
As the minutes ticked by, and he kept checking to see if I was still there, I began to think about God.
How when I find myself inconsolable, I turn to Him.
How when I feel like I’m drowning, just knowing He is there by my side is all I need to finally catch my breath.
How while I may not be able to physically feel him, His presence is an on-going comfort to me.
That afternoon my little one just needed my reassuring presence by his side to remind him he was not alone. That he’s safe and loved.
As I was providing my son with what he needed, God was providing me with what I needed.
The Lord is never too busy for His children. Yet, there are times I feel too busy to just be with my own little one.
Life will always have a to-do list, and sometimes we need to reprioritize our list to make time for what is truly important.
Even if it’s to lie on the carpet next to a crying toddler’s bed.
Eventually, my son’s breathing evened out, and he fell asleep nestled amongst his favorite stuffed animals.
As I write this, I don’t remember what my boss needed that day or what meal I prepared for dinner but I do remember the feeling of peace I felt as I lay next to my son. A feeling of peace that I was right where my son and God needed me to be.