A Gift for Mom! 🤍

     Shortly after I turned 40, I slipped into a deep denial phase where my failing eyesight was concerned. I was determined to conquer the inevitable–by winning the fight and becoming the ultimate victor in the age versus eyesight battle. About a year and half into my quest, I realized how futile my efforts had become. I begrudgingly gave in and made the appointment. Long story short–I now have the glasses, but still try to go without them on occasion, only to get put in my place more often than not. I’m reminded–mostly by my children– that I really need them to see clearly–especially when they shove something in front of my face to quickly read–and well, it’s just a blur.

     My diminishing eyesight reminds me daily that life is a blur. So much has faded into the past—and so much still seems out of focus about the future. That’s the hard part. It’s what makes my blurry eyes turn misty at the thought of time not standing still. But as sure as my eyes will continue to worsen, I can still see so much, clearly.

    I can see my youngest daughter transforming from our baby, into a young girl with her own interests and her own opinions. I see her face changing. I’m in awe of how our children can one day seem so small, and then almost instantaneously, turn into older version of themselves, before our eyes. I see new freckles on her face, fewer teeth, and eyes that grow brighter with each new realization she stumbles upon. I see a girl who both admires her older sisters, and longs to be with them–yet has every intention of blazing her own trail. I see her doing just that one day, and I love her for it.

   In my middle daughter, I see pure determination. Her sights are already set on big things and although I can see her dream, it probably looks more fuzzy to me at this point, than it does to her teenage self. Admittedly, I see myself in her. Mostly the stubborn part. I’m certain I didn’t have her full confidence (or talent) at this age. In her too, I see dramatic outward change, as proof that time never lingers in the faces of our children. She’ll join her sister in high school this year, and the evidence of that next step is crystal clear most days (aside from a few moments when the teenage struggle between maturity and meltdowns becomes very REAL!! In that, I see her passion, and I love her for it.

    Let’s be honest, I just literally do not see my oldest daughter much these days! Senior year looms, and the desire to be on her own or with her friends is at the forefront of her thoughts. I totally get that. I was her too, in so many ways. So now, I take every single opportunity to cease the moments we do share, just the two of us–or as a family. I can see her heart, even from the outside, and it’s beautiful. Right now, she doesn’t have a clear vision for what her future holds, but I know, that whatever path she chooses, her kind and loving heart will guide her. In her, I see the something special that each firstborn seems to hold within, and I love her for it.

    My eyes are failing, but I see things now, that my children cannot. I see their beauty on days when they, or others, choose to make them think otherwise. I see friendships that will fail and others that will flourish. I see obstacles they will face and likely overcome, but not without a few tears to cloud their sight. I see “firsts” and “lasts” that will come and go without them so much as blinking. I see their bright futures, in ways they may not at this moment, because they’re busy looking in other directions.

I may not see very well, but I’ll take my view any day. 

Because it’s beautiful.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Amy Sharpe

Amy Sharpe is a former television news anchor from Kansas who migrated north with her family 8 years ago, when her husband was named Voice of the Huskers! (good thing she LOVES Red!) Since arriving in Lincoln, and adding a third daughter to the family, she now works at St. Mark's church as the Director of Event Management and Video Specialist. She also enjoys the flexibility of freelance on-air and voice work. When she's not busy toting her girls back and forth, from soccer games to dance to theatre rehearsals, she finds happiness in sharing the stage with them and watching local productions. And yes, there's always time to sport their RED and support the Huskers!! With each passing year, she's realizing more and more, that she really is living the "Good Life" here in Nebraska.

My Prayer Is Simple Now: “I Believe; Help My Unbelief.”

In: Faith
Woman sitting by water

I have spent most of my life in faith. Not circling it or analyzing it from a distance, but inside it—learning its language before I even realized I was learning it, shaping myself around it in ways that felt as natural as breathing. I was raised in Christian Science, which is a very particular kind of faith. It’s not really about “believing” in the way most people think. It’s about understanding. Aligning your thoughts with what is ultimately true about God and reality. If you can understand rightly, you can be well. If you can see clearly, healing follows. So...

Keep Reading

Your Worth Is Not Someone Else’s To Measure

In: Faith, Living
Woman looking over canyon

Insecurity is something we all carry in one form or another. For me, it has probably always looked confident and outgoing from the outside. But internally, it can feel heavy, complicated, and exhausting at times. And when someone comes along whose behavior reinforces those insecurities, it amplifies what was already there. There was someone I had hoped to genuinely connect with, but it was clear from the start that the feeling wasn’t mutual. From the beginning, their wall was up. No matter how kind I tried to be or how carefully I showed up, it never came down. Their distance...

Keep Reading

Lord, Give Me Faith Like Hannah

In: Faith
Woman walking in field with hand in wheat

Hannah knew what it was like to feel forgotten. She often clutched her empty womb and thought Surely the Lord has forgotten me.  She knew the bitter sting of feeling isolated and alone. She knew the anguish of praying day after day after day and seeing no fruit, not even a bud, from her faithfulness. Hannah knew what it was like to feel like the weight of the world was on her, and her hope may have dwindled. Even those around her did not offer encouragement. Quite the opposite—they did their best to sow seeds of discouragement. Yet Hannah pressed...

Keep Reading

God Carries Me Through the Deep Waters of Change

In: Faith, Living, Motherhood
Woman at the beach as waves come in

“Ahhh!” My underwater scream garbled in my snorkel tube as the manta ray’s cavernous mouth swept a hand’s distance from my face. My fingers tightened around the surfboard until my knuckles ached. My arms trembled. I jerked my head side to side, searching for my daughters, Mia and Megan. Recent college graduates, they had joined me on one last mother-daughter vacation before launching their adult lives. They floated easily on the vibrant Hawaiian water, relaxed, trusting. I wanted to borrow their calm. Earlier, our guide had explained that the LED lights built into the surfboard attracted plankton the way college...

Keep Reading

Faith After a Rare Disease Diagnosis

In: Faith, Motherhood
Family smiling in posed photo

My pastor frequently speaks of “kid pain” and acknowledges there’s nothing like it. I can testify to that. After nine months of uncertainty and unexplained issues following the birth of our now 4-year-old daughter, Harlow, we finally received her diagnosis of Pyruvate Dehydrogenase Complex Deficiency (PDCD), a life-limiting mitochondrial disease with no cure and no FDA-approved treatments. It was heartbreaking. In moments like these, a parent can fall into complete desperation. You go through a range of emotions almost too fast to name: fear for your child’s life; anxiousness about how much time you’ll get with them; overwhelming grief. And...

Keep Reading

What If I Don’t Hear God’s Voice?

In: Faith
Woman with folded hands looking up

There have been many times over the years when I’ve heard others share stories of how the Lord spoke to them or gave them a sign. Seashells scattered along a sandy beach, numbered to represent how many children they would have. A quiet walk in the park, followed by a clear sense that another little one was coming. What a blessing, I think, when I hear and read their stories. I often wonder how much more faith they must have than I do—to know with such certainty that what they heard was truly God speaking. I listen, I smile, and...

Keep Reading

God Holds You As You Hold Everyone Else

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother holding toddler daughter on her hip, standing outside

She stands in the kitchen, hands trembling over the sink, tears she cannot let fall pressing behind her eyes. The world outside her window is quiet, but inside her heart there is a storm she cannot name. She is hurting, not because she does not love her life, but because somewhere along the way she forgot how to breathe inside it. Yet even in her pain, little voices call her name. Tiny hands tug at her shirt. Lunchboxes need packing, homework needs checking, hearts need holding. And so she wipes her face, forces a smile, and whispers a quiet prayer:...

Keep Reading

Yes, I Know Fear—but I Also Know Faith

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother holding child's hands in hospital bed

The night my daughter woke up screaming at 3 a.m., I knew something was wrong. Her cry wasn’t the half-asleep whimper of a bad dream. Instead, it was pain—raw and sharp. Within an hour, we were rushing to the emergency room, the world outside our headlights still wrapped in darkness. Tests, scans, questions, and then the words no parent ever wants to hear: “We’re transferring her to another hospital by ambulance. She needs surgery right away.” They said “torsion.” They said “tumor.” They said “appendix.” I nodded, because that’s what mothers do. We stay steady, even when our hearts are...

Keep Reading

10 Years after My Mother’s Death, Her Faith Still Guides Me

In: Faith, Grief
Woman praying

Growing up, I was a reluctant Catholic. My mother would drag us to church, and I’d go through the motions—fingers moving across rosary beads without really feeling the prayers. But she never stopped. Sunday Mass, daily prayers, devotions to the Blessed Mother. She was relentless in her faith, not because she was trying to force it on us, but because she genuinely believed we would need it someday. She was right. My mother died of stage 4 colon cancer in 2012. My brother and I watched her suffer, saw how her body betrayed her, watched as treatments failed. And here’s...

Keep Reading

Finding God in the Middle of Disbelief: A Mom’s Journey through Faith and Fear

In: Faith
Mother holding hand of young child, silhouette

“But the Lord is with me like a mighty warrior; so my persecutors will stumble and not triumph over me.” – Jeremiah 20:11 God, thank You for making sure my son is okay. Thank You for this just being paranoia. I believe in You. I believe in Your control. I believe. I believe. I believe. These words streamed through my head as my husband drove us downtown to visit our first specialist with our 4-month-old son, Maximus. Our pediatrician had written me off, but I could not ignore the feeling in my bones that something was wrong. Tiny, hard bumps...

Keep Reading