Dear Teen, Your Mother Delights in You

A Gift for Mom! 🤍

I was there the first time you belly laughed. You found something uproariously funny and as that laugh bubbled up and sheer happiness burst from your chubby baby face, your mom’s face lit up. She hung up the phone and gave her full attention to you. (She was making an appointment for you and had just gotten through to someone after 15 minutes on hold, but that hardly mattered anymore.)

You laughed and chuckled and giggled and squealed. Your mom laughed right along with you, her eyes bright, her attention never wavering from you. You were totally connected, delighting in each other. It was a moment I’ll never forget and I feel honored to have been there to witness it.

And I think there was a reason I was there: to remind you that your mother delights in you.

Over the past few years, I’ve seen you both struggle to communicate. I’ve seen your opposing ideas, thoughts, and wills come up against each other in flushed faces, streaming tears, slammed doors, and strained silences. I’ve read anger and sorrow on both of your faces and it feels like a long time since I’ve seen the mutual exuberant joy of that first moment you laughed together.

But I promise this: your mother delights in you still.

When she talks to me about how smart you are, what a beautiful young lady you are becoming, how kind you are to your brother, what a good friend you are, and how funny you are, her eyes show that same sparkle they did the day you first laughed with her.

And while that sparkle shows up when she speaks of you, you need to know that it isn’t there because of what you do. It’s not there because she witnessed you being kind or because you mastered a new skill or got an A.

The sparkle is there simply because she delights in you.

Not in what you accomplish or how you behave, simply because you are you. It’s just as it was in the moment you first laughed. I was there. It was a great laugh. It made me giggle and smile and feel happy, but that was nothing compared to what I saw in your mother at that moment. For her, it was a moment of pure wonder and complete devotion. She lost herself in that moment of delighting in you just being you. And that wonder and devotion? It has never left her.

I know it’s hard right now. That sparkle may be hard to see in this season of your lives, but I promise you it never went anywhere. Look harder. Ask your mom about that moment—about all the pure, sparkle moments of your firsts. Watch her talk and you’ll see it in her eyes. Sneak a peek at her watching you do something you excel at or something you’ll enjoy.

You’ll see it in her eyes.

I know communicating is difficult now and I’m confident it will get easier and you’ll find your way back to that feeling of the first laugh together, but until then hold on to the good moments, look for that sparkle in her eyes, and remember: your mother delights in you.

You may also like:

Dear Teenage Daughter, I Will Be Right Here Waiting For You to Come Back

The Friction That Happens Between a Mom and Her Teen Daughter

I Will Always Love You Anyway

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Anne Metz

Anne Metz works part time as a freelance writer and spends the other part getting kids off the bus, breaking up fights, doing laundry, cooking, and cleaning up after her son and triplet daughters. For fun she enjoys whistling loudly and just slightly off key and eating meals that other people prepare for her. She is passionate about sharing her struggles with mothering to let other moms know they aren't alone in this journey. You can find more of her work on her blog: www.onceuponamom.net

These Moms on the Sidelines Became My People

In: Motherhood

Moms with arms around each other watching baseball

Spending hours on end on a ballfield on Mother’s Day may not sound ideal to most, but the ones who get it know that it’s about so much more than watching young kids play ball. It’s about the instant bonds you make with families who end up becoming like your own family. It’s being surrounded by people who cheer for your kid louder than you do yourself. It’s about being lucky enough to have a pack of moms who will care for your child in your absence and send you pics and videos of what you are missing when you...

Keep Reading

I Wanted Experts to Fix My Child with ADHD. Instead, They Changed Me.

In: Motherhood

Little boy sitting at table talking to adult

I thought the experts were going to fix my child. I didn’t say that out loud. But it was there…quiet, desperate, sitting underneath every question I asked. If I just found the right strategy… If I just understood ADHD well enough… If I just listened hard enough… Maybe the meltdowns would stop. Maybe the chaos would settle. Maybe I would finally feel like I knew what I was doing. So I started asking questions. Over the past year, I’ve had the opportunity to interview ADHD experts (clinicians, researchers, specialists) through my podcast. And I showed up to every conversation like...

Keep Reading

Parenting a Child with a Disability Is Holy Ground

In: Motherhood

Some moments in motherhood stay with you. First steps. Preschool graduation. A first dance recital. And then there are harder times. The ones that do not make it into photo albums. The moments when the world feels too big and your child feels painfully misunderstood. When you are parenting a child with a disability, those moments tend to find you more often. This day should have felt like a win. My son had just met a goal in therapy. We walked out of his OT’s office smiling, carrying a page full of lopsided circles that had never looked more perfect...

Keep Reading

I Came Home With a Baby—and Lost Myself

In: Motherhood

I don’t think people truly believe me when I say I came back from the depths of hell after having my son. Birth is often portrayed as pure bliss. The moment a mother holds her baby and instantly falls in love. Life quickly returns to normal. Even in real life, new moms can look like they’ve settled into motherhood with ease. But what no one talks about is the ugly, incredibly hard side of it. Not every mom experiences postpartum depression, anxiety, or OCD. For some, it really is bliss. But for many of us, it becomes a fight for...

Keep Reading

He Doesn’t Always Need Me Anymore and I’m Not Sure How To Feel About It

In: Motherhood

Little boy playing with toys on the floor alone

There is a moment nobody warns you about. Not the sleepless nights. Not the feeding schedules. Not the endless cycle of laundry and worry that comes with keeping a tiny human alive. Those parts everyone mentions. The part nobody mentions is the moment you realize your child has started becoming his own person. And you are standing there watching it happen, equal parts proud and completely unprepared. My son is two years old. And lately he has been leaving the room. Not in a concerning way. In a he has somewhere to be kind of way. He will be in...

Keep Reading

We Keep Calling Her Confident, But She Doesn’t Trust Herself

In: Motherhood

I remember the exact moment it hit me. I was talking to a young girl, the kind everyone praises. She was polite, well spoken, respectful. The kind of girl people point to and say, “She’s so confident.” So I asked her a question I knew would reveal more than her smile ever could: “What do you do when something doesn’t feel right?” She froze. Not in a dramatic way, but in a quiet, almost invisible way. She looked down, shifted her weight, then looked back up at me, searching my face like the answer might be written there. Because she...

Keep Reading

I Knew Something Was Wrong, But No One Listened—And It Almost Cost Me My Daughter

In: Motherhood

After the traumatic birth of my daughter, I searched for others who had experienced vasa previa, but most of what I found were support groups for stillbirth. It’s easy to understand why; vasa previa is one of the most preventable causes of stillbirth, and yet most people, including most pregnant women, have never heard of it. My daughter is almost three years old, and I still carry a complicated guilt about that: why did we get to be the lucky ones? I want to share my story—not to frighten you, but because awareness is the only thing that saves lives...

Keep Reading

I Finally Admitted I Didn’t Want To Be a SAHM Anymore

In: Motherhood

For most of my life, I believed becoming a stay-at-home mom wasn’t just a choice, it was the ultimate goal. The kind of life a “good” woman was meant to want. The kind of life that meant you were doing things right. I grew up surrounded by that message. In conservative spaces, in church circles, in subtle conversations about what a “real” mother looked like. Women who stayed home were praised. Women who didn’t were quietly questioned. I learned, without ever being directly told, that a mother’s highest purpose was to center her entire world around her children and her...

Keep Reading

I’m Not Really Sure How To Do This Teenager Thing

In: Motherhood, Teen

I was not prepared to be a mother of teenagers. Sure, I was warned by other parents about the difficult journey I was about to embark on, but I did not expect it to be this challenging. I remember these two sweet, innocent children who wanted to be with me all the time. Now they barely give me the time of day. How did we get here? Like many parents, we long to have that child who once, a long time ago, called us Mommy and Daddy and begged us to read them another story. Where are those kids I...

Keep Reading

Why Don’t We Talk About Jonah’s Mother?

In: Faith, Living, Motherhood

Praying for My Son Send a storm to stop him; Let his friends throw him out. May he drop to the deeps, But gently, please, Stubborn though he may be. If it could only take three days, How my mother’s heart would Rejoice in praise. From the hell you allow him, Let him cry to you. Is not Nineveh and mercy Exactly what he knows He needs— A mercy on enemies He fears You will concede? Please let all the shade wither If his is an angry soul; Humble him and help him follow Where you would have his purpose...

Keep Reading

Better Late Than Never: An Apology to My Mother

Grown Children

Better Late Than Never: An Apology to My Mother

Postpartum Depression Stole My Joy, But God Gave it Back To Me

Baby

Dear Teen, Your Mother Delights in You

And I think there was a reason I was there: to remind you that your mother delights in you.

The sparkle is there simply because she delights in you.

You’ll see it in her eyes.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Anne Metz

These Moms on the Sidelines Became My People

I Wanted Experts to Fix My Child with ADHD. Instead, They Changed Me.

Parenting a Child with a Disability Is Holy Ground

I Came Home With a Baby—and Lost Myself

He Doesn’t Always Need Me Anymore and I’m Not Sure How To Feel About It

We Keep Calling Her Confident, But She Doesn’t Trust Herself

I Knew Something Was Wrong, But No One Listened—And It Almost Cost Me My Daughter

I Finally Admitted I Didn’t Want To Be a SAHM Anymore

I’m Not Really Sure How To Do This Teenager Thing

Why Don’t We Talk About Jonah’s Mother?

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

Dear Teen, Your Mother Delights in You

And I think there was a reason I was there: to remind you that your mother delights in you.

The sparkle is there simply because she delights in you.

You’ll see it in her eyes.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

These Moms on the Sidelines Became My People

I Wanted Experts to Fix My Child with ADHD. Instead, They Changed Me.

Parenting a Child with a Disability Is Holy Ground

I Came Home With a Baby—and Lost Myself

He Doesn’t Always Need Me Anymore and I’m Not Sure How To Feel About It

We Keep Calling Her Confident, But She Doesn’t Trust Herself

I Knew Something Was Wrong, But No One Listened—And It Almost Cost Me My Daughter

I Finally Admitted I Didn’t Want To Be a SAHM Anymore

I’m Not Really Sure How To Do This Teenager Thing

Why Don’t We Talk About Jonah’s Mother?

Previous Post

Next Post

You May Also Like