Is anyone else as sick of the facade as I am?
Because on social media, everyone seems to have their crap together. But I sure don’t.
Scrolling through my feeds leaves me feeling inadequate and lonely, desperately lonely.
I know social media is only the high points. I know there is always more going on behind the scenes that I don’t know about. But at the end of the day, I just feel like there’s no one who would want to be friends with little, imperfect, insignificant, me.
So, I’m placing an ad.
Wanted: Imperfect Friends
A kind, but quirky, woman is in search of imperfect friends.
Must be willing to overlook piles of laundry and undone dishes (not always, of course, she’s not a generally dirty person). If your own home also has excessive amounts of laundry and looks like it occasionally needs a clean-up crew similar to the one that descended upon New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina, this friendship may be for you.
If you don’t have time to fold said laundry but have time to binge watch Netflix, this friendship may be for you.
If you can rock a ponytail and/or messy bun and realize that, at this stage in your life, flawless hair is for holidays and special occasions, this friendship might be for you.
If your nails are chipped or, better yet, not painted, this friendship might be for you.
If your kids are kind but kinda crazy, this friendship may be for you.
If you generally want things to be nice but realize perfection is an ever-moving target that you can’t achieve, this friendship might be for you.
If you’d rather down a bowl of popcorn than pretend to like salads, this friendship might be for you.
If she can invite you over for a dinner of leftovers, or maybe, if it’s a bad day, even just a giant bowl of said popcorn, this friendship might be for you.
If you talk about characters from books, movies, or tv shows, as if they are real people, this friendship might be for you. Basically, if Michael Scott is not someone you regularly reference, this friendship is not for you.
If you are a little weird, like “I was on a competitive puppet team in high school” (not that I’m speaking from experience here or anything) weird, but not like “I store toe clippings or post pictures of bodily fluids” weird, this friendship might be for you.
If you theoretically like to plan but also rock the cramming of a true procrastinator, this friendship might be for you.
If you can roll with the punches life throws your way with flexibility, coffee, and a whole lot of Jesus, and are looking for an encouraging companion to help you fold the laundry, eat the popcorn, and tell you that the Instagram women are totally fake and you’re doing just fine, this friendship might be for you.
Inquiring parties can apply with a picture of the current state of their kitchen and a list of their top three TV shows of all time.