Guys, it started with this post. The 4 questions to ask your kids each night.

And then our writers came up with a list of 50 questions to ask your kids each night.

And then they came up with 70 faith-filled questions for kids, too.

These have been some of my very favorite conversation starters for our kids. But at night, even though we’ve been so good about talking to our kids, the hubs and I aren’t able to chat much.

Especially with a new baby.

So – I asked our writers to once again share their wisdom. Questions they ask their spouse each night or each week to encourage conversation. These are questions you can ask at the dinner table with the kids and some you can save for just each other’s ears. We hope you love them and that they spark more than just conversation in your home!

1. When did you feel most….excited….embarrassed…despairing today?” (Or any other emotions.) It really brings out stories that we otherwise forget to share.
2. Is there anything I can help you with this week?
3. What’s one thing you did well today?
4. What’s one thing you could have done better?
5. Before bed we do a “Today I love you because…” and “Today my compliment for you is….” You can also do highs and lows from the day.
6. Is there anything I can help you do around the house so we can have some time together after the baby is asleep?
7. Is there anything stressing you out at work or home?
8. Is there anything you need that you’re not getting?
9. What are you looking forward to this week?
10. What did you do today that you are proud of?
11. Is your cup full?
12. Is there one thing we do really well in our relationship and one thing we need to pay more attention to?
13. Every now and then I’ll ask how I can make him feel more respected (Biblical) or appreciated as a husband; we are also both teachers so asking if I can help him grade or plan a lesson with him is always fun!
14. What’s on your bucket list? Or make one together.
15. Because we are a military family with lots of unknown changes, we often ask each other where we hope to be in 5 years.
16. What are you excited about at work?
17. Who did you talk to that you encouraged this week?
18. Everyday I’ll share with him an article, video, or something that I found interesting so we can talk about it.
19. How do you feel about our evenings? Is there a balance of play and rest and activity?
20. What’s the weirdest thing you Googled today?
21. My husband is a bit of a nerd (self professed  ) and I know if our conversations are getting dull, I can ask him what’s going on in the Marvel Universe these days and he’s all passion. Same thing with Star Wars or Dr.Who or whatever. I know that doesn’t translate for all couples, but I think it’s about knowing your husband’s passions and asking questions that show you’re interested in what interests him (and vice versa). This is also why I occasionally listen to sports talk radio although I don’t care anything about sports. It helps to be informed about the stuff he’s going to want to talk about.
22. What made you laugh today?
23. What made you happiest today?
24. What are 10 things I do that makes you feel loved? (We each wrote down 10 then exchanged them.) I think we’re going to turn it into an end-of-the week thing and I’ll ask for the top two things this week that made him feel loved.
25. What challenges did you face today?
26. We (weirdly) usually ask each other what we had for lunch. It’s a little thing but it helps me feel connected to his day and leads to where we ate, with who etc. and a whole lot of other things spring from this one question.
27. What is your current passion?
28. I try to be sure to ask something specific that I know he is thinking about and might need encouragement about. If he comes in wearing his headphones I know he is loving some music and “What are you listening to” is the question to ask even though I will not know a single band he is talking about. He still likes to tell me.
29. What can I do to make you feel loved? Or… When do you feel loved the most? That way we keep the focus on the positive, but we are always looking for feedback and ways to improve our relationship!
30. I think it’s important to start with gratitude. Make an effort to stand or sit next to each other, look one another in the eye and say thank you.
31. How crazy was your day today?
32. How many “fires” did you have to put out today?
33. Every single night when he gets home I ask him if I can pour him a cold beer. . .his answer is usually a good judge of how the day went!
34. How can I best support you this week?
35. When there’s something stressful or challenging… I ask “Did you pray about that?”
36. What time can you arrange for cuddles and snuggles?
So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Leslie Means

Leslie is the founder and owner of Her View From Home.com. She is also a former news anchor, published children’s book author, weekly columnist, and has several published short stories as well. She is married to a very patient man. Together they have three fantastic kids.  When she’s not sharing too much personal information online and in the newspaper – you’ll find Leslie somewhere in Nebraska hanging out with family and friends. There’s also a 75% chance at any given time, you’ll spot her in the aisles at Target.

I Thought Our Friendship Would Be Unbreakable

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Two friends selfie

The message notification pinged on my phone. A woman, once one of my best friends, was reaching out to me via Facebook. Her message simply read, “Wanted to catch up and see how life was treating you!”  I had very conflicting feelings. It seemed with that one single message, a flood of memories surfaced. Some held some great moments and laughter. Other memories held disappointment and hurt of a friendship that simply had run its course. Out of morbid curiosity, I clicked on her profile page to see how the years had been treating her. She was divorced and still...

Keep Reading

The First 10 Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking

In: Journal, Marriage, Relationships
The First Ten Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking www.herviewfromhome.com

We met online in October of 2005, by way of a spam email ad I was THIS CLOSE to marking as trash. Meet Single Christians! My cheese alert siren sounded loudly, but for some reason, I unchecked the delete box and clicked through to the site. We met face-to-face that Thanksgiving. As I awaited your arrival in my mother’s kitchen, my dad whispered to my little brother, “Hide your valuables. Stacy has some guy she met online coming for Thanksgiving dinner.” We embraced for the first time in my parents’ driveway. I was wearing my black cashmere sweater with the...

Keep Reading

To The Mother Who Is Overwhelmed

In: Inspiration, Motherhood
Tired woman with coffee sitting at table

I have this one head. It is a normal sized head. It didn’t get bigger because I had children. Just like I didn’t grow an extra arm with the birth of each child. I mean, while that would be nice, it’s just not the case. We keep our one self. And the children we add on each add on to our weight in this life. And the head didn’t grow more heads because we become a wife to someone. Or a boss to someone. We carry the weight of motherhood. The decisions we must make each day—fight the shorts battle...

Keep Reading

You’re a Little Less Baby Today Than Yesterday

In: Journal, Motherhood
Toddler sleeping in mother's arms

Tiny sparkles are nestled in the wispy hair falling across her brow, shaken free of the princess costume she pulled over her head this morning. She’s swathed in pink: a satiny pink dress-up bodice, a fluffy, pink, slightly-less-glittery-than-it-was-two-hours-ago tulle skirt, a worn, soft pink baby blanket. She’s slowed long enough to crawl into my lap, blinking heavy eyelids. She’s a little less baby today than she was only yesterday.  Soon, she’ll be too big, too busy for my arms.  But today, I’m rocking a princess. The early years will be filled with exploration and adventure. She’ll climb atop counters and...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, I Loved You First

In: Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships
Man and woman kissing in love

Dear husband, I loved you first. But often, you get the last of me. I remember you picking me up for our first date. I spent a whole hour getting ready for you. Making sure every hair was in place and my make-up was perfect. When you see me now at the end of the day, the make-up that is left on my face is smeared. My hair is more than likely in a ponytail or some rat’s nest on the top of my head. And my outfit, 100% has someone’s bodily fluids smeared somewhere. But there were days when...

Keep Reading

Stop Being a Butthole Wife

In: Grief, Journal, Marriage, Relationships
Man and woman sit on the end of a dock with arms around each other

Stop being a butthole wife. No, I’m serious. End it.  Let’s start with the laundry angst. I get it, the guy can’t find the hamper. It’s maddening. It’s insanity. Why, why, must he leave piles of clothes scattered, the same way that the toddler does, right? I mean, grow up and help out around here, man. There is no laundry fairy. What if that pile of laundry is a gift in disguise from a God you can’t (yet) see? Don’t roll your eyes, hear me out on this one. I was a butthole wife. Until my husband died. The day...

Keep Reading

I Can’t Be Everyone’s Chick-fil-A Sauce

In: Friendship, Journal, Living, Relationships
woman smiling in the sun

A couple of friends and I went and grabbed lunch at Chick-fil-A a couple of weeks ago. It was delightful. We spent roughly $20 apiece, and our kids ran in and out of the play area barefoot and stinky and begged us for ice cream, to which we responded, “Not until you finish your nuggets,” to which they responded with a whine, and then ran off again like a bolt of crazy energy. One friend had to climb into the play tubes a few times to save her 22-month-old, but it was still worth every penny. Every. Single. One. Even...

Keep Reading

Love Notes From My Mother in Heaven

In: Faith, Grief, Journal, Living
Woman smelling bunch of flowers

Twelve years have passed since my mother exclaimed, “I’ve died and gone to Heaven!” as she leaned back in her big donut-shaped tube and splashed her toes, enjoying the serenity of the river.  Twelve years since I stood on the shore of that same river, 45 minutes later, watching to see if the hopeful EMT would be able to revive my mother as she floated toward his outstretched hands. Twelve years ago, I stood alone in my bedroom, weak and trembling, as I opened my mother’s Bible and all the little keepsakes she’d stowed inside tumbled to the floor.  It...

Keep Reading

Sometimes Friendships End, No Matter How Hard You Try

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Sad woman alone without a friend

I tried. We say these words for two reasons. One: for our own justification that we made an effort to complete a task; and two: to admit that we fell short of that task. I wrote those words in an e-mail tonight to a friend I had for nearly 25 years after not speaking to her for eight months. It was the third e-mail I’ve sent over the past few weeks to try to reconcile with a woman who was more of a sister to me at some points than my own biological sister was. It’s sad when we drift...

Keep Reading

Goodbye to the House That Built Me

In: Grown Children, Journal, Living, Relationships
Ranch style home as seen from the curb

In the winter of 1985, while I was halfway done growing in my mom’s belly, my parents moved into a little brown 3 bedroom/1.5 bath that was halfway between the school and the prison in which my dad worked as a corrections officer. I would be the first baby they brought home to their new house, joining my older sister. I’d take my first steps across the brown shag carpet that the previous owner had installed. The back bedroom was mine, and mom plastered Smurf-themed wallpaper on the accent wall to try to get me to sleep in there every...

Keep Reading