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“Luke is your favorite child,” his siblings sometimes say to me.

They assume this because the majority of my time revolves around Luke’s needs, an interesting assumption because this favorite child of mine sure requires far more of me than anyone else does. This favorite child of mine requires total care. This favorite child of mine will require total care for the rest of his life.

Perception is a funny thing, huh?

I would do anything to send Luke off to college next year. Anything to not change another diaper. Anything to not assist in feeding or dressing or bathing him. Anything for him to be able to complete these basic life skills on his own. Anything to not have to spend countless hours on the phone fighting for services for him and for us.


RELATED: Dear Special Needs Mama, You’ll Find Your Voice

But, just because I’m willing to do anything doesn’t make it a viable option. And so I fight for the underdog. This is what we do, right? Especially as mothers!

We fight for our children.

Yes, all of our children, but most of mine don’t require as much energy or fighting for. But Luke does.

And I hope that my fight for him will prove someday that I also fought for them. I fought to teach them the importance of fighting for what they believe in. Fighting for what needs to be changed. Fighting for those who have no voice.

RELATED: Becoming a Special Needs Parent Was Unexpected—But So is My Strength As a Mother

And loving all of them through the example I show by daily laying down my life and caring for their disabled brother who will require some level of fight from me for the rest of his life.

I hope and pray that one day they see my fight for him was also a fight for them, for their futures, for their children, and for their lives.

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

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Jess Ronne

I’m an author, teacher, wife, non-profit director, special needs advocate and mom of 8. A few years back, we traded in our Michigan snow shovels for humidity and sweet tea in the South & we’ve never looked back. You’ll often find me on social media chatting about faith, grief, food, simplicity, blended families, gardening, special needs, and everything else in between. 

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