By Alissa Kay

Baby time was almost here! We had already left home and had packed for summer & fall. If this baby was going to be ours, we’d be staying in Wisconsin for weeks, maybe even a month or more. Natalie was about to be induced as she was 41 weeks… I was nervous and excited as we waited to get the call to say “she’s here!” And still anxious to see how everything would play out… would this baby girl be ours after all?

We spent the day waiting with anticipation and that night the most beautiful baby girl was born… They invited us to the hospital the next day to meet Kara. After a good night’s sleep, we drove to the hospital and left Matthew with my in-laws. We visited with Natalie and her baby for 15 minutes. After that, we met with a social worker from Wisconsin and we had a great visit with Natalie’s grandma in the hospital’s cafeteria. We then left to get back to our son… it was hard to leave the hospital without that sweet baby. But we knew it was right. At that moment, she was Natalie’s baby and they needed time together.

The next day was discharge day… deep breaths. With Matthew, we didn’t know his birth parents when we took placement and we only saw the “happy” side of adoption. I will never forget this day. An emotional rollercoaster is an understatement. We sat in the waiting room for hours as Natalie worked up the courage to leave the hospital without her baby… we were in the waiting room with her family
and her friends. It was surreal as we all cried together. Then finally it was time. We all hugged and said good-byes. Not a dry eye in the room. I will never forget the sobs from Natalie. I hated to watch them get on the elevator empty handed. I felt horrible. Then it was my turn for a breakdown… I sobbed as my husband held me tight. I cried for Natalie. And I cried for Kara. She had to say good-bye to the only mom she knew. So many people think adoption is a beautiful thing and it can be. But we know that adoption is also full of loss and heartache. (Side note: We did not see Natalie say her good-byes to Kara. It’s important that she had that time to herself. And while the rest of us said our good-byes baby Kara was being taken care of in the nursery.)

I calmed myself down, took some deep breaths and then it was time for us to meet with the nurse and get ready for discharge. Less than an hour later, we were walking out of the hospital with our daughter! While it was a super emotional day, we were ecstatic to be bringing Kara “home” and we were already so in love with that little bundle of pure joy.


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Alissa Kay

Alissa was born and raised in the Midwest and currently calls Wisconsin home. She's happily married to her college sweetheart and she's living out her dreams of being a stay-at-home mom. Although, let's be real, she's hardly ever home. She's the mom to 3 kids who all came to her via adoption. A boy (8) and 2 girls (6 and almost 4!). The kids keep her plenty busy, but when she has free time she enjoys a night out with friends or curling up with a good book.