Free shipping on all orders over $75🎄

“Can we just be forever friends?”

I recently asked two friends that question. It was said in jest as we chatted and lounged on the playground equipment, sipping our iced coffees, and watching our little ones tear up the park. But as the cheeky words came out of my mouth, I realized it was a silly question with a whole ton of actual hope and truth and prayer behind it.

Because, frankly, it has been way too hard for me to find that friend who seems more like a long-lost sister than a complete stranger who I met one day and started scheduling playdates with because we desperately needed some company and to get out of the house. Then, something magical happens, and suddenly, we are sharing more than playdates together. We share life and faith and the ups and downs. True sisterhood.

And maybe, just maybe, we’ll even be forever friends.

It’s no secret that loneliness plagues many of us women. We’ve all been there. And when you’re up to your shoulders in children, sleepless nights, big messes, and dirty diapers, it’s hard to ask for help or put yourself first or even try to get out of the house. I felt this isolation and set of struggles as a new mom. I didn’t know how to ask for help, what I even wanted, or where to find true companionship.

As an introvert and a do-it-myself kind of woman, it took me a while, but I have finally let myself go after what I truly need. I put myself out there and pursue the friendships that bring enjoyment, peace, and remind me I’m not the only one whose sweet 1-year-old turned two and now believes it’s her turn to be the parent.

Finding real friendships is a gift. It feels refreshing to meet and connect with others who understand what you’re going through and aren’t there to judge you or overwhelm you with advice you didn’t ask for.

I’ve lived enough and lost enough to know that some people, for whatever reason, only stick around for seasons. Life does happen and people do change.

RELATED: When You Realize a Friend Doesn’t Feel the Same Way About You

I have also experienced that, with intentionality, some friendships last for the long haul. Some friendships can even be rekindled and what had been broken can be mended.

The key is to work at it.

We have to call or text and keep in touch. We have to set up coffee dates, dinners out, or playdates. We invite each other over and invite each other out. We travel across a few states to see each other. We get our whole families together, husbands and kids included. We meet each other’s parents and siblings and take an interest in one another’s past, dreams, and struggles.

Meaningful friendships take work. Work that doesn’t have to be time-consuming or add stress to life, but rather built from little steps of love and kindness that add up over time to create a lasting friendship. And although we never can seem to get together as much as we’d like, every bit of intentionality helps us stay connected and deepens our friendship roots.

There’s something beautiful about having found a gal pal to do life with, whether it’s womanhood or motherhood. I’m truly grateful to have dear friends in my life and hope some of them might just be my forever friends.

RELATED: Make Room For Mom Friends in Your Life—You Need Them More Than You Know

Because they’re the ones who laugh at the same ridiculous jokes as me. The ones I can facetiously tell, “Enjoy every single sloppy moment of motherhood because it’ll go fast,” after they tell me they’re dead exhausted because their little one was up all night cutting teeth and nursing. The ones who roll their eyes and chuckle with me when our kiddos are fighting over the same one toy when there are about 267 other toys to play with.

I pray she’ll be my forever friend.

The ones who will take the girls’ vacations, or day trips, or ladies’ nights out, so we can go on adventures, make memories, and not lose ourselves. The ones who cheer me on from the sidelines. And when they succeed and I cheer for them, it feels like I won, too. The ones who will brave their summer swimsuit with me, even though our thighs are bigger and our tummies are a bit jiggly now, so we can just enjoy the water, the beautiful weather, and the time (that goes so fast) with our kids.

I pray she’ll be my forever friend.

The ones who understand the tantrums and somehow still seem to love my little monsters (I mean, darling children). The ones who replied to my text two days ago, but forgot to actually press the send button. The ones who show up for birthdays and baptisms and the occasional rough day. The ones who are just as excited to have a kid-free outing as I am without feeling guilty. The ones who send me funny GIFs to cheer me up or text me when they’re having a crappy day, too.

I pray she’ll be my forever friend.

The ones who admit there are parts of being a wife or mom or adult that aren’t enjoyablethe parts we wish we could fast forward through but make the most of anyway. The ones who remind me to keep the faith.

I pray she’ll be my forever friend.

I love you and you mean the world to me. I hope I won’t lose you to time, or distractions, or because a new season rolls in.

RELATED: Life is Too Short For Fake Cheese and Fake Friends

Have you found that friend you want to be your forever friend? The friend who makes the journey of life a little more pleasant and entertaining? Work at it and be intentional. And to really seal the deal, throw on your cleanest pair of yoga pants, bring your Bud an iced coffee (because no one ever says no to that), and ask her that six-word question we’re all secretly waiting to be asked . . .

Can we just be forever friends?

Good things take work, and friendship is no exception. The One Year Women’s Friendship Devotional offers encouragement and practical advice for forming true, uplifting relationships.

(We may receive a small commission through the affiliate links we share, but trust us—we only recommend products we truly love!)

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Pamela Palmer

Pamela Palmer is the founder of www.upheldlife.com where she produces faith resource articles and weekly devotionals to inspire keeping faith at the center of it all. She self-published her first book Living a Deeper Faith: Nurture Your Relationship with God and Live a Faith-Fueled Life. She is also published regularly on BibleStudyTools.com. She is a woman in pastoral ministry and gets to share in the emotional and spiritual lives of many people, being a small piece of each journey. She lives on Jesus, coffee, and music. Pamela resides in the Midwest, married the perfect man for her, and they have two beautiful kiddos together.

Hey Friend, Meet Me in the Mess

In: Friendship, Living
Friends smiling

If you come to our home, you’ll likely see a basket of folded or unfolded laundry waiting to be put away. You may even see a pile of dirty clothes hanging out by the washer. If you come to our home, you’ll likely find spitty bits in the sink from where little kids brushed their teeth in a hurry and forgot to rinse. Despite my best efforts, they always seem to find their way back. If you come to our home, there’s a 50-50 chance the beds will be made. If they were made, there’s a high chance they were...

Keep Reading

Your Husband Needs Friendship Too

In: Faith, Friendship, Marriage
3 men smiling outside

As the clock inches closer to 7:00 on a Monday evening, I pull out whatever dessert I had prepared that week and set it out on the kitchen counter. This particular week it’s a trifle, but other weeks it may be brownies, pound cake, or cookies of some kind. My eyes do one last sweep to make sure there isn’t a tripping hazard disguised as a dog toy on the floor and that the leftover dinner is put away. Then, my kids and I make ourselves scarce. Sometimes that involves library runs or gym visits, but it mostly looks like...

Keep Reading

When You Need a Friend, Be a Friend

In: Friendship, Living
Two friends having coffee

We have all seen them—the posts about the door always open, the coffee always on, telling us someone is always there when we need support. I have lived with depression my entire life. From being a nervous child with a couple of ticks to a middle-aged woman with recurrent major depressive and generalized Anxiety disorder diagnoses. Antidepressants, therapy, writing, and friends are my treatments. The first three are easy, my doctor prescribes antidepressants, I make appointments with a therapist, and I write when I feel the need. RELATED: Happy People Can Be Depressed, Too The fourth is hard. As I...

Keep Reading

Give Me Friends to Do Everyday Life With

In: Friendship
Two women at a sporting stadium, color photo

She sees me coming. A small wave from her house window and a silent invitation to come on over for our morning coffee. An unsaid invitation to connect with someone who gets the joys and challenges of being a mother. A quick, small, and valued break from life and stress and my house messes has become the perfect way to start the morning. A neighbor who has become a dear friend. Prior to this encounter, alarm clocks were ringing, breakfast was made, backpacks were packed, and shoes were missing. School mornings are rough. Motherhood is rough. The world around us...

Keep Reading

Sometimes Friendship Is Tested

In: Friendship
Two women friends hugging

Sometimes our own experiences can be hard on our friends, especially when those experiences have to do with fertility and pregnancy. My friend and I met when our children were six months old at a mom’s group Christmas party. She was the only other mom there without a partner, her husband having refused to attend in favor of playing video games in the silence of an empty home just like mine. Her son was a day younger than my daughter. Although she was almost 10 years older than me, we became fast friends, bonding over the loneliness that is staying...

Keep Reading

Give Me Friends Who Aren’t Keeping Up with the Joneses

In: Friendship, Living
Woman standing outside, color photo

Following trends is nothing new. Long before Kitsch curls and Lululemon belt bags, there were perms and, well, the original fanny packs. There’s been a constant, circulating rotation of must-buys for us to feel cool or relevant. And we women have been especially pressured to think we need these things to be accepted and part of the elusive village. Keeping up with the Joneses (or Kardashians for that matter) has just never been my thing. There are plenty of reasons why I’ll never be called a trendy girl: I can’t afford to be one. I lack the stylish eye required....

Keep Reading

Lifelong Friends Are Golden

In: Friendship, Living
Smiling group of women friends

They know all your secrets. They can name your old elementary and high school crushes, your most embarrassing moments, your biggest regrets. They know the one you love and the ones that got away. They celebrate your greatest achievements and empathize with your wish-you-could-do-overs. You don’t have to be wordy in texts, phone calls, or conversations—you get one another. Weeks, months, and sometimes even years may pass, and you pick up right where you left off. Laughter with your crew is like none other—unrefined, unrestrained, childhood bliss relived. RELATED: Good, Long Distance Friendship is Hard But So Worth it You’ve...

Keep Reading

Thank You for Being a Friend Who Grieves Beside Me

In: Friendship, Grief, Loss
Friends with arms around each other photographed from behind

My loss has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to endure, and I honestly don’t know if I would be here without you and your love and support. To cry with you and to you. To sit with you in silence or filled with so many words. To feel you holding me literally and emotionally with your gentle and loving arms. RELATED: I’m the Friend With the Dead Mom To understand and witness that my loss is a loss to you too, and to feel that importance of my friendship and life to you. To randomly break...

Keep Reading

As Our Children Get Older, Friends with Young Kids Are Such a Beautiful Gift

In: Friendship, Motherhood
Woman with two young girls, color photo

When I walk into our neighborhood pool these days, I’m often greeted by a small, usually wet, 4-year-old. Her face lights up and she runs toward me, wrapping her arms around my legs, and looking up at me from behind turquoise goggles. We bonded a few months ago when I decorated her wrist with an assortment of rainbow-colored, rubber bracelets and filled her a plate of marshmallows and strawberries. Now she draws pictures for me, jumps to me in the shallow end, and runs toward me if she spots me somewhere.   Sometimes her mom, who is a dear friend...

Keep Reading

Friend, It’s Okay to Say No

In: Friendship, Motherhood
Woman holding coffee cup sitting by window and relaxing

Last week I hosted a sleepover birthday party for six girls. Six 5-year-olds descended on our house, invited by me in a weak moment of expansiveness and generosity to my 5-year-old’s birthday wishes. I fed them pizza and ice cream cake. They demanded candy. They staged a disco party. They stayed awake past midnight. Almost everyone cried at some point. The next morning—after serving six waffles with whipped cream, not with butter, why don’t you have strawberries?—I felt exhausted and annoyed at myself for taking this on. It was unequivocally a terrible idea. I should’ve known it was too much....

Keep Reading