Kids Motherhood

I Love You Enough to Not Give You Everything You Want

Written by Jenny Albers

My daughter sat on the bed, pouting, upset that I wouldn’t take her to the store to get a new toy.

I love you,” I said as I turned to leave the room. “And, I’m sorry that you can’t have everything you want.”

“Only because you won’t let me have everything I want,” she stated matter-of-factly.

“No, it’s because I love you,” I responded. “I love you enough to not give you everything you want.” 

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She rolled her eyes, clearly unwilling to accept this truth, and asked to be left alone. So I walked away and closed the door behind me.

But it’s true. I do love her enough to not give her everything she wants. 

And when she’s ready to talk to me again, here’s what I will tell her:

My child, I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you will find contentment when you have nothing more than what you need.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that longing for more doesn’t deplete you, but living for more fills you up.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that your desires don’t burn so brightly that you become blind to the needs of others.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you don’t just consume, but also contribute.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that your heart will illuminate upon giving, not just receiving.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you’ll know how to help others instead of just helping yourself.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that gratitude will be imprinted on your heart even in times of scarcity.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you’ll learn how to work hard and how to sacrifice, both for your own good and for the good of others.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you can learn happiness doesn’t come from having it all, but from giving your all.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that you will be prepared for a world that disappoints, but know a God that never does.

I love you enough to not give you everything you want.
So that one day you’ll realize you already have everything that matters.

I can’t possibly give you everything you want, child. And even if I could, I wouldn’t. Because it’s my job to help mold you into someone who sees others before you see yourself. Someone who chooses self-sacrifice over self-indulgence. Someone whose life is so full of meaning and purpose, mercy and grace, faith, love, and compassion, that you’ll have plenty of it to give away.

I love you my child, and I know that you won’t grow or blossom if you always get what you want.

So I won’t give you everything.

It’s not easy to grow. And it takes patience to blossom. But even though a life without everything you want is hard, I promise you that it is still so, so good.

This article originally appeared on A Beautifully Burdened Life

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About the author

Jenny Albers

Jenny Albers is a midwestern girl at heart who is raising two kiddos on earth while remembering the two who are in heaven. After experiencing pregnancy loss, Jenny has found healing through writing. She is a contributor at Pregnancy After Loss Support and you can find her writing about life, loss, family and faith on her blog A Beautifully Burdened Life. In her free time, Jenny enjoys reading, sewing, and wandering the aisles of her favorite thrift stores. You can follow her on Facebook and Instagram.