So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

I didn’t feel connected to my daughter the moment she was born. I didn’t experience the immediate “falling in love” with her that my husband did.

As family visited the hospital room, and later our home, they would ask questions like, “Can you believe how much you can love someone so fast?!” I smiled and agreed, but behind my smile, wondered what was wrong with me.

How could I not feel deeply connected? I carried her inside of me for nine months for crying out loud. I felt her every kick and bump. I talked to her in the car while I was running errands, and felt her dig her heels into my side in response.

And yet when she was born, I didn’t feel that deep heart connection that mothers gush about. Maybe it was because I was battling depression. Maybe because I felt so overwhelmed and lost in my new role.

When I talked to her, she stared at me in wonder, eyes bright, with no clear emotion on her face for me to read and respond and connect. Or she cried. I would check her diaper and try to feed her, the only two tricks I had up my sleeve. If that didn’t work, I felt at a loss as I desperately attempted to rock and bounce her back into a peaceful state. 

What did she need? What did she want?

For weeks, I felt like a fraud, a shell of a person who went through the motions and smiled at my baby, but didn’t feel connected or bonded in the way mothers are supposed to connect with their children.

And then one day, my daughter started smiling. And cooing.

I began to recognize familiar emotions, and to notice the tiny nuances between her cries. The more she communicated, the more skilled I became at recognizing and responding to her emotions. I learned what made her smile, and what made her squeal in delight. And as I did those things she loved most, a connection began to form.

I learned that she preferred fake screaming to peekaboo, and dada’s swaddle to mama’s. That she didn’t want anyone to watch her while she pooped, and that she saved her hardest laughs for our dog’s sniffs and licks along her jaw.

The more time we spent together, the closer we grew. Three years later, I continue to feel even more connected to her every month that passes.

Now she’s old enough to pick up on mama’s nuances. She understands my sense of humor better than anyone, and knows the phrase to sing, the words to say, and the face to make, to make me laugh so hard I cry.

She knows the exact second I’m about to open my mouth to demand she stop her shenanigans. And she beats me to the punch every time by warning herself, “Be caaaaareful!” or “Do we eat our hair? Nooooo. We eat food.”

We enjoy countless inside jokes and a closeness that I cannot rightly put into words.

So mama (or dad), if you’re not feeling a connection yet, you are not a bad parent. In fact, I would venture to say that you’re pretty darn normal. But you, and everyone that feels like you, don’t want to voice how you’re feeling out loud.

So I’ll voice it for you. 

Your connection is coming. Your bond will run deep. Just you wait.

Deb Preston

Deb Preston is an author, editor, amateur gardener, and professional cheese lover. Originally from Iowa, she now lives just outside of San Antonio, Texas with her husband, daughter, and unnecessarily loud beagle. You can find her writing on her website (,, or in any of her books. You can also connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

So God Made a Mother With a Willing Heart

In: Motherhood
Mother and daughter smiling, color photo

You may have heard it said that God only gives special children to special parents.   But, when God made the mother of a child who has special needs, the Lord did not need a special mother, the Lord needed a mother who was willing. God needed a woman who would say yes to an assignment that many choose not to accept. The Lord knew she wouldn’t feel qualified to raise a child with special needs, but that didn’t matter because God would equip her every step of the way. Since there is no such thing as a perfect mother,...

Keep Reading

Mothering One Day at a Time

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother holding daughter in matching shirts, color photo

As I sat with my growing belly, full of anticipation for the arrival of my firstborn, the possibilities were endless for this little girl. Maybe she would lean toward the arts and be a dancer, writer, or musician. Or maybe she would take after her great-granddad and become a scientist. And maybe one day she would be a mother too. Dreaming about the future was fun and exciting. But then she surprised us with an at-birth Down syndrome diagnosis. Special needs were never included in my dreaming sessions.    All of the sudden, my hopes and dreams for this new...

Keep Reading

Fall into the Arms of Jesus, Little One

In: Faith, Kids, Motherhood
Child walking

I have three younger brothers, so I know how crazy and wild boys can be. Lots of falls, cuts, scrapes, bruises, broken bones, and even a couple of head stitches. My husband has two younger brothers. He’d always tell how they used to jump from the banister down two floors onto the glass coffee table. Why anyone would do that, I have no idea. Pure madness and chaos.  Right now, I have a little baby boy who’s only seven months, but I know he will probably be just as wild as his uncles and dad. But that doesn’t mean I’m...

Keep Reading

No Screens Before 7: How Our Family Broke Free of the Screentime Habit

In: Living, Motherhood
Kids using smartphones

“We still have three more minutes!” my 7-year-old says, bouncing with Christmas-like anticipation and excitement. “Well,” I say, looking from him to his 9-year-old sister, “what could you do for three minutes?” “Leg wrestle!” they exclaim and run to the carpeted living room. This life-filled exchange was not happening in my home just a couple of months ago.  In spite of my best efforts, screen time had taken over. Both the kids and I would slip into this zombie-like, space-time vortex. I would look up and know it wasn’t healthy, but it was just so easy to just keep on...

Keep Reading

You Don’t Have to Lose Yourself to Be a Good Mom

In: Living, Motherhood
Woman brushing wet hair

There is nothing wrong with losing yourself in motherhood. Diving in head first, serving your kids and spouse endlessly, never asking for a break, being proud for providing an amazing childhood for your kids, and allowing mom to become your entire identity. But what if you don’t want that?  When did this become the standard of motherhood we are all expected to achieve? Why does society say the best mom is the one that’s 110% physically and emotionally available for her kids all the time and never does anything for herself? Why are you less of a mom if you...

Keep Reading

10 Tips to Banish Teenage FOMO

In: Faith, Motherhood, Teen
Teen with red hair smiling

Do you ever feel like the whole world is having a party—and you weren’t invited Maybe you worry about being included in the right groups or invited to the right sleepovers. Maybe you envy the relationships you see at school or youth group or feel jealous of the perfect social media posts showing others making memories together. If you’re a teen in 2022, you’re probably well acquainted with the fear of missing out. Knowing or wondering what you’re missing or who is getting together without you can leave you feeling lonely. It can leave you lonely and a little blue....

Keep Reading

I Know It’s Just Summer Camp but I Miss You Already

In: Kids, Motherhood, Tween
Kids by campfire

You would’ve thought I was sending you off to college. The way I triple-checked to make sure you had everything you needed and reminded you about the little things like brushing your teeth and drinking plenty of water about a thousand times. You would’ve thought I was sending you to live on your own. The way I hugged you tight and had to fight back some tears. The way you paused before leaving just to smile at me. The way I kept thinking about that boyish grin all the way home. The way I kept thinking about how you’re looking...

Keep Reading

I Want My Boys To Become Men of Character

In: Kids, Motherhood
Young boys with arms around each other by water

I’m a single mama of two young boys. As a woman raising young boys, I’ve thought a lot about how I want them to act—as kids and adults. We joke around that I’m not raising farm animals, and we don’t live in a frat house. I’m trying to plant seeds now so they grow into men with positive character traits. They burp, fart, spray toothpaste on the sink and somehow miss the toilet often, but I’m trying to teach them life lessons about what it means to be great men and gentlemen.  Interactions with other men provide opportunities for us...

Keep Reading

I’m So Thankful For This Little Family

In: Faith, Marriage, Motherhood
Toddler boy and infant girl, color photo

I remember my teenage self dreaming, hoping, and praying for a life like I have now. Praying for a man to love me, to be loyal to me, to want a family with me, to provide for me, to show me what stability felt like and what it felt like to not ever have to worry . . . and here he is right in front of me. I remember my teenage self dreaming, hoping, praying for a house I could make a home and raise my family in. Here it is right in front of me. But most of...

Keep Reading

The Kids are Grown—Now What?

In: Grown Children, Motherhood
Middle aged couple at home smiling

Between video chats with our son stationed overseas, our daughter flits in and out our door from college while the shoe jungle by the front door and lack of peanut butter in the house are proof our youngest adult son is still under our roof.  Our kids are now independent—almost. Gone are the days of diapers, endless food preparations, naps (well, not for me), and announcing everyone’s daily schedule like a calendar drill sergeant. After years of simultaneously spinning multiple plates on various body parts, we managed—by God’s grace—to raise three kids to adulthood. We made it! (High five!) We...

Keep Reading

5 Secrets to the

BEST Summer Ever!


Creating simple summer memories

with your kids that will  last a lifetime