Business owners are smart. Especially Etsy shop owners who see an opportunity—like capitalizing on the latest American obsession. So here it is. For “This is Us” fans (hahaha—like there are people out there who AREN’T “This is Us” fans), Etsy shops are now offering Crock-Pot decals of phrases like “Unplug Me, Jack” and also images of his beautiful face.
This is how we can bring him back, girls. And also keep our Crock-Pots. Kidding! Crock-Pot was very quick to defend their product after America’s sobfest 2018, saying in a statement:
Crock-Pot understands the concerns brought up by last night’s episode of “This Is Us,” and we too are heartbroken by the latest development in Jack’s storyline. However, it is important that our consumers understand and have confidence that all Crock-Pot slow cookers exceed all internal testing protocols and all applicable industry safety standards and regulations as verified by independent third-party testing labs. For nearly 50 years with over 100 million Crock-Pots sold, we have never received any consumer complaints similar to the fictional events portrayed in last night’s episode. In fact, the safety and design of our product renders this type of event nearly impossible.
Relax, Crock-Pot. We’d throw out our hair straighteners too if they took Jack from us. It’s not you, it’s us.
Anyway, now that we know our Crock-Pots are safe, we can help soothe our broken hearts by paying homage to everyone’s dream husband. With stickers.
Here are a few of our faves:
SouthernExposuresLLC offers this option for either a black or silver Crock-Pot, to help you avoid Jack’s fate. But really just because you want his name on your favorite kitchen appliance.
If you want Jack to remind you to unplug things IN A HEART (because you loooooove him), this one from MHHandmadeDesigns might be your choice:
MyVinylTouch offers this one if you want to show off your hashtag game as you cook a pot roast.
This from JossyLou is probably the one Crock-Pot wants us to get:
And if you really did abandon your beloved Crock-Pot for the more efficient Instant Pot, there’s a Jack decal for you too! Find it on SimplySmithDesignz.
Finally, if you’re just bitter and want to blame Crock-Pot, despite their proof that they DID NOT KILL JACK, here’s one from ThreeCraftyChics. I also like this one so I can blame my Crock-Pot for when I make a crappy dinner that no one likes.
Husbands! These suckers are like five bucks. Mothers Day is a few months away. Need I say more? (You’re welcome.)