Recently, I had a friend ask if she could interview me and several other mothers for a class she was taking. I obliged, and she called me on the phone. Her first few questions were simple: How old are you? How many kids do you have? What are their ages? etc. Easy answers. However, her next question stopped my heart.
“What will you miss the most when your kids are gone?”
“Gone?” I sputtered.
“Yes,” she said “When your kids are grown up and gone from your house what will you miss the most?”
I had never dared to picture my life without them in it every day. I felt my emotions strangling me.
“Everything,” I squeaked. “I will miss everything.”
“Can you be more specific?” she asked. The tears were spilling down my cheeks.
“I’ll have to call you back,” I sniffed.
It took me some time and a few boxes of tissues, but here it is: My specific, real answer about what I will miss when my kids are grown up and gone from my house.
I will miss the noise. The noise of their giggles and voices calling my name. The noise of the front door when they come home from school or their friend’s house. The noise of cartoons blaring on the TV. The noise of their pretend play.
I will miss the mess. The mess of toys scattered all over the house. The mess of laundry piled on the couch. The mess of coloring supplies and papers on the table. The mess of crumbs all over the floor.
I will miss adventures. The adventures to the park and our favorite store. Adventures to the mountains and camping in our tent. The adventures to Grandma and Grandpa’s house and trips to Disneyland. The adventures to the big sledding hill and planting pumpkins in our backyard.
I will miss snuggles. The snuggles before bedtime and the snuggles when they wake up. The snuggles when they’re sick and when they’ve had a bad day. The snuggles after their bath and in the middle of the night.
I will miss reading. The board books, picture books, and the weekly trips to the local library. I will miss Little Critter, Biscuit, Berenstain Bears, Mercy Watson, Pinkalicious, Harry Potter, and Greg Heffley. I will miss sitting in the rocking chair with them on my lap while we read.
I pray I won’t forget these magical years with my kids at home. I pray I won’t forget how precious the little everyday moments are. I pray I won’t take this life for granted. I think Taylor Swift sang it best, “Oh, darlin’ don’t you ever grow up, don’t you ever grow up, just stay this little.”