Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

Kids everywhere are celebrating, or will be celebrating soon. They will be playing outside, enjoying warm summer days, bike rides with friends, and maybe even sleepovers.

It’s summer—it’s fun, right?

Sure, it is. And sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes it isn’t fun for the kids you least expect it from.

We have that issue, and I knew it was building for the past few weeks with our teenage daughter. She was moody (moodier than normal). Short tempered. Obviously frustrated, but not ready to talk about it. But it was when she came home on the last day of school, in tears, that I knew. I knew what it was before she even said it. Someone had a last-day-of-school event, and she was not included. Again.

RELATED: Dear Daughter, Don’t Rush

She used to ask why. She would be told they “forgot” to ask, or that she lives out of town so that was an issue. She is 16 now and most of their excuses don’t work anymore. Now it just REALLY hurts. When she sees all the pictures on social media tonight I will be there holding her hand. My heart hurting with hers. I understand because sometimes moms are excluded too. I don’t get asked to do a lot, and I am okay with it. But to her, it’s important.

And every summer it is the same.

I have suggested she reach out to people, invite them to come over, but they mostly do not want to come someplace out of town. I suggest meeting somewhere, and sometimes that works. I point out all the activities she has going on in the summer.

“Those are school-based activities, Mom. No one ever asks me to hang out. I don’t have anyone just asking if I want to go to the pool or just come over and sit in the sun and read.”

I don’t understand. I truly don’t. She is involved in clubs, sports, and music. She is pretty, funny, and smart. She has friends. But during the summer, they fade. It’s hard to explain these types of “friends” to teenagers. It’s hard to explain that they will not matter in the future because NOW it hurts. NOW it’s real. And it sucks.

RELATED: I Refuse to Raise a Mean Girl

I know this is the reason my children will choose to live in town—not in a rural area. They are tired of being outsiders. Sometimes I get tired of being treated like one as well. Like it or not, it is there.

Exclusion hurts.

It doesn’t matter who you are. Where you are. How old you are. Exclusion hurts.

Be stronger. Be kind. That one single person you decided not to invite for whatever reason? That one person might be the person you have been looking for all along.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Her View From Home

Millions of mothers connected by love, friendship, family and faith. Join our growing community. 1,000+ writers strong. We pay too!   Find more information on how you can become a writer on Her View From Home at https://herviewfromhome.com/contact-us/write-for-her//

I Wish I Could Tell You There Will Be No More Mean Girls

In: Faith, Kids, Motherhood
Mother and two daughters, color photo

Tonight before bed while I was tucking you in, you seemed really down. You are normally bubbly, talkative, full of laughter and life, but tonight you seemed sullen and sad. I asked what was wrong, and at first, you didn’t want to tell me. But then you shared with me what was breaking your heart. You told me about a mean girl. You told me the hurtful things she said and the unkind way she acted and the sneaky way mean girls bully by making you feel left out and less than.  It made me sad and angry. I didn’t...

Keep Reading

It’s Lonely Being the B-List Friend

In: Friendship
Woman leaning on window

I’m a B-list friend. I’m not a top tier or A-list friend. I’m not a best friend. I’m no one’s favorite person. Sure, I’m included sometimes, and I know my friends love me. But, the list of things a B-list friend isn’t included in is painfully long: Girl’s night? Only if it’s a group of five or more. Dinners with other couples? Only if it’s a birthday dinner where a room has been rented at a restaurant or function facility and the guest list is long. Weekends away? Only if it’s a really large group. Saturday night gatherings? Only if...

Keep Reading

Dear Child, When You Face Disappointment

In: Faith, Motherhood
Child hugging knees

Dear child, I have discovered my most important contribution as a parent. I get to teach you– daily–that people aren’t perfect. Ugh! It’s a rotten, humiliating gig. You notice all the inconsistencies in my words and behavior, hypocrisy magnified through the microscope of so much time spent together. And despite all my dreams of being a calm and loving mother, you also see me at my tired or angry worst and feel the brunt of my humanity because parenting happens 24/7. RELATED: God Doesn’t Ask Me To Be a Perfect Mom; He Asks Me To Point My Kids to a...

Keep Reading

Find Your People—It’s Worth It

In: Friendship, Living
Group of friends under tent, color photo

There are two things I know for certain about life: Part of it will be hard. So incredibly hard you won’t be sure about how you’ll make it through some days. You can’t survive it alone. I don’t think you’d want to try either. You need other people. RELATED: It’s Lonely Being the B-List Friend We’ve all heard about a “village.” I’m sincerely happy for you if you’ve found yours. But for others, it almost seems like a mythical idea. You might be a person who never really felt like you fit in or connected with a group. You might...

Keep Reading