Monday: Picnic and play at the park.
Tuesday: Swim and popsicles at the pool.
Wednesday: Storytime at the library.
Thursday: Invite friends over to play games.
Friday: Movie and pizza.
I am exhausted. My calendar is jam-packed with activities for my children. And since they are young, they all involve my 100 percent participation, leaving me physically, emotionally, and mentally worn down.
I’ve planned many playdates, outings, and get-togethers for my children, when does momma get a chance to play with her friends?
I grab my phone and feverishly type the words to my friends:
Meet for Mexican? DELETE
Yoga and happy hour? DELETE
Manicure and pedicure? DELETE
Oh, how I long for a chance to reconnect and relax with my friends—so why as soon as I type the words, do I feel shame and guilt?
If I have free time, I shouldn’t waste it going to dinner with girls, I should catch up on some work.
My mom friends are probably too busy—I doubt they would want to go out with me.
I have to find a sitter, pick out an outfit, and prepare dinner before I go—it’s too much work.
As mothers, we spend the overwhelming majority of our time caring and prioritizing our children’s needs that we neglect our basic needs. We have the constant presence of our little ones, yet we still feel alone. We convince ourselves it is selfish to desire alone time or indulgent to go out with our friends.
Momma, you need playdates, too.
For the same reasons, we place high importance on our children’s socialization—the same principles can be applied to us mothers. We host friends in our living rooms because we know that conversation and companionship make for happy hearts.
We play tag, splash through the sprinkler, and jump to new heights because physical activity encourages positive thoughts.
We read for hours, conduct experiments, and build forts because creativity is a way to express ourselves.
Next time someone invites you to grab dinner and movie, go for a walk, or join a book club, say yes.
Before you were someone’s mother, you were somebody’s friend. Make room in your life for both relationships, throw out the mom guilt, grab your girlfriends, and schedule a much-deserved momma only playdate.