So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

Having another baby made me a better mom.

There. I said it. I know it sounds weird, but it’s my truth.

It’s not like I wasn’t a “good” mom before I had another baby, but having my second definitely made me better.

My firstborn gave me life. A new life. She filled my heart with the purest unconditional love. She promoted me to the highest title I’ve ever had. She made me a mama.

For the first time, I wasn’t living for myself. I was living for my family. For the tiny little blue-eyed bundle that didn’t leave my arms.

At first, it was such an insanely difficult adjustment. I was on top of the world and my heart was overflowing with love, but it was hard. So hard.

No matter how many books I read, no matter how many seasoned parents I talked to, nothing could have prepared me for how much my life would drastically change.

It’s something you can’t fully appreciate until you’re in it and you’re living it.

It’s an amazing, amazing blessing and the most beautiful new reality, but it’s different. I was in uncharted territory and it was downright terrifying.

The love I felt was stronger than I could have ever even imagined. The happiness I felt in my heart was unreal. The gratitude and thankfulness was all-consuming.

But so was the reality that getting out of the house was so much harder. Running to the store was no longer a simple errand. There were no more nights out with the girls. There were no more lazy Sunday mornings sleeping in.

There really wasn’t any sleeping going on at all.

Getting the chance to do my hair and makeup was rare and having the energy to do it was even rarer. All of my clothes were covered in spit up and the laundry piles were scary high.

My once clean house became heavily lived in. The sink seemed to always be full, the baseboards were collecting mountains of dust and the sticky floors were in dire need of a daily wash.

Learning to juggle a million different tasks at once was one of the hardest lessons.

All of my days were tightly scheduled around my baby girl and her feeding times, diaper changes and nap times. I was so sleep deprived, I felt like I was living in the twilight zone for the first few months.

My emotions were all over the place and on top of that, my body had changed dramatically.

I looked different and I felt different.

I didn’t recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. It was truly one of the strangest feelings I had ever felt.

While I was exactly where I had always dreamed of being, parts of me definitely clung on to the freedoms of my old life. Parts of me definitely resisted the surrendering of the completely carefree lifestyle with no responsibilities.

When I became a mama for the second time, my whole world changed yet again.

It is so mind boggling and so insanely incredible how much your heart can love and grow. When I didn’t think it was possible to love anymore than I already did, my tiny little redheaded angel proved me wrong.

My heart doubled in size.

Not only that, but I found that I was able to do twice as much as I thought I was capable of.

The first couple of weeks were sweet, messy and chaotic, but gosh . . . they were so good. So fun. So fulfilling.

We eventually got a nice little rhythm down and I surprised myself every single day with how much I could handle at one time.

Two babies to calm, two babies to feed, two babies to change, two babies to snuggle, two babies to teach and to play with. Two babies who needed me and depended on me fully.

Every day my confidence grew and the cloud of inferiority tapered off.

Having another baby somehow forced me to LET GO.

It forced me to let go of control and of my crazy, unrealistic expectations.

It forced me to let go of what WAS and fully embrace what IS with an excited and grateful heart, mind and soul.

It forced me to accept myself, my body, my responsibilities, and my chaos.

It forced me to be extremely vulnerable and to be comfortable there.

It forced me to lean on the Lord completely.

Through Him, I am exactly who I need to be. I’m right where I need to be.

The days became crazier and more hectic, but it was there that I found peace.

Sometimes being pushed outside of your comfort zone is exactly what you need to grow and to learn to just let go.

There are many times in life where we are given much more than we can handle.

But, it’s in those times that tremendous transformations take place and you realize that your best is enough.

You are enough.

And everything about that is absolutely beautiful.

You may also like:

Your Second Baby Will Double Your Heart

My Second Baby Taught Me to Mother Without Fear

Roxy Neuenschwander

I am a dedicated wife to my amazing husband and a stay at home mom to 2 beautiful girls (2 and under). We will be welcoming #3 this Fall! I strive to live a life full of Jesus, joy and belly laughs!

When a Rainbow Baby Meets Mama

In: Baby, Loss, Motherhood
newborn baby on mother's chest

This week, one year ago, was one of the most difficult weeks of my life. Fast forward to exactly one year later, and here I am cuddling you, my sweet boy. I never truly understood what “rainbow baby” was all about, but I get it now. Sure, I knew what it meant and what it represented. I had read the articles and heard the stories. I had seen the meaningful images and understood the definition. But I never truly and deeply knew what happens when a rainbow baby meets their mama . . . until you. When a rainbow baby...

Keep Reading

How Do You Know it’s Really the Last Baby?

In: Baby, Motherhood
Selfie of pregnant woman standing next to child, color photo

I love being pregnant. I love everything about it. I am, however, one of the lucky ones who has been blessed with stress-free pregnancies. I get the typical morning sickness in the first trimester and the utter exhaustion in the third trimester, but other than that, it’s just pure enjoyment. I know not everyone has that experience, some have horrific pregnancies, but for me they have all been relatively easy. Trust me, I do know how fortunate I am. I’m currently pregnant with my fourth child. The little man is due this summer. From the very beginning when I first...

Keep Reading

It’s Hard on a Mother’s Heart To Watch Her Last Baby Grow Up

In: Baby, Motherhood
Child walking away in grass

My youngest son turned two a few months ago and still has a binky. He actually calls it his “mimi,” and he loves it so much. This morning I  looked at him with a mimi in his mouth and a mimi in his hand before I walked him into daycare and realized something. I am not ready to let go of the baby stage.  Getting rid of the binky would be the last step of the baby stage. He is already in a big boy bed. He doesn’t want to sit in a high chair for meals. He tries to...

Keep Reading

Some Babies Are Held Only in a Mother’s Heart

In: Baby, Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Ultrasound of baby

“Whatever may come and whatever may pass, we have faith that our God will bring us to it and through it.” That’s what I wrote in a post after we announced our third pregnancy. It was the first pregnancy we went public with, but it was the third time we had two positive lines on a pregnancy test. You see, we had miscarriage after miscarriage after miscarriage. We went from surprised optimism to guarded yearning and finally stolen joy. The first baby was nothing more than a what-if before that test. It was a surprise to two people who loved...

Keep Reading

Because There Were Two

In: Baby, Motherhood
Sonogram image of two babies, black-and-white photo

Because there were two, there were gasps and tears and disbelief. There were spreadsheets developed before you even got home from the initial ultrasound appointment and fears and relentless morning sickness and books to read and endless worries and what-ifs. There were extra ultrasounds and extra fears, extra heartburn and floor plans for extra bedrooms, extra back pain and extra cribs, extra strollers and extra car seats. Because there were two, you will always be outnumbered. There are 20 fingers and 20 toes, too much laundry, and never enough hours. There were missing socks and missing pacifiers, dirty bottles and...

Keep Reading

Finding Wonder in the Waiting of Secondary Infertility

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother holding toddler son, color photo

Secondary infertility is hard. It’s an all-encompassing phenomenon that hyper focuses your brain on a single goal: another baby. The perplexity of secondary infertility is that you’ve done this before. You fertilized an embryo, carried the growing child within your womb, and delivered your bundle. It was the most challenging and yet seemingly effortless event of your life. Looking back, you wonder how you achieved such an amazing feat without assistance. Now, with Clearblue ovulation tests pouring from your pantry, period trackers abounding, basal body flow charts, and the pineapple (so much pineapple) you are unable to do the one...

Keep Reading

What I Wish Someone Would’ve Told Me About Gender Disappointment

In: Baby, Motherhood
Pregnant couple holding boy or girl sign

I was in the corner of my closet hiding behind my wedding dress and every formal I’ve ever owned. It was dark, stuffy, and felt like a good place to hide. I’d just found out I was having a boy, and I was devastated in ways I didn’t think possible and was trying to hide what I was feeling from the world around me.  What kind of mother isn’t completely enamored with her baby-to-be? Did this make me a monster? I should have been happy. After all, I was having a healthy baby. That’s like winning the lottery. Instead, I...

Keep Reading

The Conversation We’re Forgetting To Have About Birth

In: Baby, Marriage, Motherhood
Woman having a baby man holding her hand

My husband lay sleeping, his head resting on a fluffy, down-stuffed pillow in our hotel room. His bag was packed neatly, ESPN was playing quietly in the background, and he had unopened snacks at his disposal on the end table. Our hotel phone rang, and my husband groggily answered, ”Yes? Oh, sorry. Yeah, we’ll keep it down. Sorry.” He hung up and found me miserable and shaky in the shower, the thin shower curtain clinging to my legs.  “Steph, we got a noise complaint. You have to keep it down!” he whispered. This is not how I expected labor to...

Keep Reading

Bathtime Washes Away the Struggles of the Day

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler

It’s 7 p.m., which means bathtime at our house. I close the drain and fill the tub with warm water. I pump Johnson’s baby soap—the water and soap swirl together and form bubbles. The bubbles dance on top of the water, just waiting to cleanse my baby boy. I toss in your foam alphabet letters, Mr. Shark, and Mr. Penguin.  I place you in the bath and lather baby soap in my hands and give you a soapy mohawk. You are barely one and still my baby, but your four fat teeth make you look older. You chew on the...

Keep Reading

This May Be the Last Time I See Those Two Pink Lines

In: Baby, Motherhood

My little caboose, I’ve just finished staring at the two pink lines. It’s not the first time. In fact, I’ve done this twice before, and each time, I am filled with the same disbelief, gratitude, and pure joy. But something is a little different this time. Unless God has different plans for us, this may be the last time I see those pink lines. And that realization makes me want to hold onto all of the last firsts we will experience together with all my might. The two pink lines. The first time we hear your precious heartbeat. RELATED: Dear...

Keep Reading

5 Secrets to the

BEST Summer Ever!

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Creating simple summer memories

with your kids that will  last a lifetime

Mother Holding Baby

5 Secrets

for New Moms

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Encouragement for the newborn stage