Gifts for Dad ➔

For the last eleven years I have been trying to explain introverts to my mother in law, who is about as extroverted as a person can be. While I am no hermit, I fall pretty far to the left on the introvert/extrovert continuum. Not gonna lie, the conversation never goes well.

But before we get into my troubles explaining introversion to an extrovert, lets clear up a few myths about introverts.

  • Introverts are not shy. 
  • Introverts do like to be around other people.
  • Introverts are not unhappy, even though it may seem that way (especially to extroverts).
  • You are not either an extrovert or an introvert exclusively, you can have traits of both.

What I have found in conversations with my mother in law and with other extroverts (like my Grandma Doris… huge extrovert, in fact I’ll bet 50% of Nebraska residents who read this know her or have at least talked to her once), I find that they have a much harder time empathizing with our introverted qualities than we do with their extroverted ones. Many of us WANT to have some of their qualities. We want to be more comfortable with large groups of people or with people we don’t know with less effort (because we can do those things, although it is often har). We want to make friends easily. But extroverts look at us and think “I can do this, why can’t they?” I implore all extroverts to think of the most hated, uncomfortable activity you can. That is how introverts feel when, say, calling someone they aren’t super close to or joining a new group.

This is even more important to be aware of when dealing with a child. Most introverted adults have developed coping mechanisms to allow them to do the things they need to do, like making phone calls, visiting a new place, or making friends. Children haven’t had the time to develop these yet. So when dealing with a mixed group of children or with an introverted child, here are some tips.

  • They will not just blurt out an answer when you ask them a question, at least not until they are super duper comfortable with you. After you ask them a question, count to three (without prompting, prodding, or asking again) before assuming they don’t know the answer.
  • They will require alone time more often than other children, and if they don’t get it they will often act out because they become easily tired and overwhelmed. Allow them time during the day to do individual activities like puzzles or coloring.
  • Do not pressure them to play with others or to “make friends.” It is generally thought that all children can make friends with each other at the drop of a hat, but this is less true with introverted children. After we moved to Minnesota Isabel, then 4, spent three months at her new preschool only playing puzzles. She participated in all the activities her teachers presented to her, but during free play she only did puzzles. As an introverted parent, I understood and allowed her this time. By Christmas she had made several friends.

The most important thing to remember when dealing with any child, of course, is that they are individuals. What works for one may or may not work for another. Embrace the differences in children as well as the commonalities and all involved will thrive.

the introverted child

An introverted child may not like their picture taken. Photo taken by Jenilee Burns, used by permission of Brandis Roush.

Brandis Roush

I am a well traveled Nebraska native who now resides in central Minnesota. My husband and I have been married just over ten years and have three unbelievably smart, beautiful children. As a family we love any outdoor activity, going to movies, reading good books, and enjoying all the fairs, festivals, and other awesome activites the areas has to offer during the 6 months it is not a frozen tundra. I graduated from Kansas State University with a degree in Secondary Education before following my husband to three different states. Since then I have received an additional certification in Early Childhood Education, started a small chicken farm, and opened a small business on Etsy. One of my many mottos is “know better, do better” so I spend much of my spare time doing research on the many decisions I must make as a parent, a business owner, a board member, a spouse, or simply as an adult and I love passing some of that information on to my readers.

Lent For Kids: 40 Ways To Spend 40 Days

In: Featured, Kids
Cross with bird

Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of the Lenten season leading to Easter. Our 3-year-old has been talking about the Easter bunny since January, when he finally understood that Christmas was over. While I’m happy he’s excited for the upcoming holiday, I really want to find some good, concrete ways to help him learn that this time of year is not only about bunnies and candy in eggs. So, I’ve decided to come up with 40 ways to spend the 40 days of Lent with kids. Some of these will work better with older children, while others are great for...

Keep Reading

Chocolate Pot de Crème

In: Featured, Kitchen

Chocolate and romance go hand in hand and with Valentine’s Day around the bend, why not have a beautifully simple and romantic dessert on the menu? With Valentine’s Day falling on a Saturday, it might be a little more difficult to get those reservations to go out to eat to celebrate. If you end up staying home, why not have an easy, romantic dessert to finish your meal? Made in a blender or food processor and refrigerated, this recipe is easy to make and the result can be a beautiful and elegant dessert that will put the perfect cap on...

Keep Reading

Creamy Chicken and Rice Soup

In: Featured, Kitchen

Written By:  Rachel Gnagy @ Inscribed Photography & Design (recipe originally from here) One of my favorite ‘girly’ meals to make is soup served in bread bowls. I love getting the Broccoli Cheese soup at Quizno’s (it’s healthy because it has broccoli, right?) and Panera’s Cream of Chicken & Wild Rice soup. YUM. So when I saw a recipe on Pinterest for creamy chicken and rice soup, I thought I would give it a try! You will need: 1 Tablespoon of olive oil 2-3 carrots, sliced 2 cloves of garlic, minced 5 cups of chicken stock 1 cup of cooked chicken,...

Keep Reading

Chicken Cordon Bleu for Two

In: Featured, Kitchen

Written By:  Rachel @ Inscribed Photography (Recipe originally from here) Valentine’s Day is coming up and with that in mind I wanted to bring you an easy, delicious meal for you and your special man. This recipe is by far the easiest Chicken Cordon Bleu recipe and it is super yummy too! Pair it with some steamed veggies on the side and something chocolatey for dessert and you’re all set for a romantic dinner for two. For the chicken, you will need: 2 chicken breasts, cut in half lengthwise 8 slices of deli ham 8 slices of Swiss cheese 1...

Keep Reading

Easy Weeknight Beef Stroganoff

In: Featured, Kitchen

We all have those heirloom recipes we grew up with, but when you get married you inherit a whole new set of recipes your spouse grew up with, too. This stroganoff recipe is one that my husband grew up eating and then cooked frequently for himself before I took over in the kitchen. (ha.) He made it for me once while we were dating, and I will admit – I was super skeptical. Generally, these sorts of humble dishes aren’t my cup of tea – the ones made with cream-of canned soups and noodles. However, I tried it and was...

Keep Reading

Hanging Onto Hope: The Dream That Saved My Baby Girl

In: Faith, Featured, Journal, Kids
Hanging Onto Hope: The Dream That Saved My Baby Girl www.herviewfromhome.com

Family and friends often assure pregnant women that their “maternal instincts” can be relied on to guide them into motherhood. This previously undiscovered gift will reveal itself the first time she holds her child. As a mother of four I believe in this instinct, but also recognize that experience and wisdom help. The birth of our fifth child, Kinsley, has introduced me to another source of guidance and strength that I never anticipated. Kinsley was born the day after Christmas. She was pink, beautiful and certified by the medical staff as being in perfect health. She was welcomed with unconditional...

Keep Reading

Bow Your Head and Vote, Yes the Outcome is Rigged

In: Featured
Bow Your Head and Vote, Yes the Outcome is Rigged www.herviewfromhome.com

“Keep in mind this is God’s plan! And who am I to dare question God’s plan!” I say it over and over as I watch this mess unfold before me. This mess, America is calling an election. I have never been impressed with the two-party system. It allows too much power to a select few and limits our freedoms. So, as I watch and listen and pray, as Trump and Clinton march to the White House, I only hope more Americans now see the disaster that is the two-party system. Two people that should be sitting in jail are now...

Keep Reading

This Kick-Ass Cancer Survivor Shares 20 Easy Ways To Make Your Life Healthier Today

In: Featured, Health, Healthy Living, Mental Health, Motherhood
This Kick-Ass Cancer Survivor Shares 20 Easy Ways To Make Your Life Healthier Today www.herviewfromhome.com

I recently went through quite an experience with my health. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in September of 2015. Following my diagnosis, I underwent a treatment regimen of chemotherapy, double mastectomy, and then, 28 rounds of radiation.  Before my diagnosis, I felt the healthiest I have probably, in my whole life. I was exercising regularly. Eating, conscious of my health. And after birthing three kids in 6 years, finding ways to focus on myself once again. And then — WHAM — cancer.  Excuuuuuuuuse me?!?! Cancer?!? I was, for all intents and purposes, a 33-year-old with great habits and a great...

Keep Reading

The Great Melt Down

In: Faith, Featured, Kids, Kitchen
The Great Melt Down www.herviewfromhome.com

When my brother Bobby and I were little kids, one of the great treats of summer was a journey to a neighboring town where my dad would buy each of us a hand-dipped ice cream cone. During the drive home, my mom would turn around from the front seat and point out drips that we back-seat-riders needed to lick up quick. I, the ever-eager pleaser, would anxiously eat my ice cream as quickly as possible, barely taking a breath between licks. Bobby, on the other hand, came up with the more reasonable response. He would grin at Mom and bite...

Keep Reading

The Best (and free) Drug Prevention Strategy

In: Featured, Health, Healthy Living, Kids, Relationships
The Best (and free) Drug Prevention Strategy www.herviewfromhome.com

A secret Facebook group has been uncovered by police that connects kids as young as 12 years-old to places where they can buy drugs. (see the link to the story at the end of this blog)  Shocking? Yes. Surprising? No. Kids find a way, don’t they? So what can we do? There are apps we can buy. There are rules we can make. There are punishments we can deliver.  Yet the best prevention of all is our relationship with our young people.  Time together, conversation, and honest sharing of our lives is the most effective way to influence our kids–even...

Keep Reading

 5 Secrets to Connect with Your Kids

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Proven techniques to build REAL connections