Today I cried while rocking my baby to sleep. We sat in the chair in her nursery and every time she drifted off to sleep, she was awakened by a loud noise or an excited scream as my toddler ran around the house making as much noise as he could. I wanted to yell for him to be quiet, but instead, I cried.

I cried because one day I won’t be yelling for my children to be quiet. Because the house will be silent.

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I cried because one day I won’t be stepping on toys with every step I take. Because there won’t be any toys to step on.

I cried because one day I won’t be fetching snacks all day long or vacuuming crumbs out of the couch cushions.

I cried because one day I won’t be changing dirty diapers or wiping messy faces.

I cried because one day I won’t be scrubbing crayon marks off the kitchen walls.

I cried because one day I won’t be cutting up meals into little bite-sized pieces.

I cried because one day I won’t be wiping away tears or kissing scraped knees.

I cried because one day I won’t be mopping dirty footprints off the floor.

I cried because one day I won’t be driving kids to doctor appointments or sporting events.

I cried because one day I won’t be awakened in the middle of the night by a crying baby.

I cried because one day I won’t hear little footsteps running down the hallway.

I cried because one day I won’t be forced to watch Paw Patrol on repeat, and I’ll be in charge of what plays on the TV.

I cried because one day my toddler won’t fit so perfectly on my lap.

RELATED: The Secret No One Told Me About the Toddler Years is How Much I Could Absolutely Love Them

I cried because one day my babies won’t need to be rocked to sleep. Because my babies will be off on their own.

Today I cried while rocking my baby to sleep. Because one day I’m going to miss this crazy, beautiful life.

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Rachel Zeko

Rachel is a special needs therapist turned stay-at-home-mom to two little ones. She enjoys being outdoors, chasing around her toddler, and writing about the joys of motherhood.

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