One of the first things I learned as a runner is patience. When I was training for my 5K I had to follow a daily plan to get conditioned so I could run longer distances. I actually started walking, then walking and running for a certain amount of minutes and finally at the end I had trained my body to run the full 3.1 miles.

But it all took patience to train slowly and trust that if I followed the schedule I would get to the end goal, my son Tyler’s 5K Memorial walk/run.

Sounds super easy when you read this; right! In real life not so much.  Along the way I learned lots of patience and trust. Like when you have sore muscles, you are tired, and the many aches and pains that come along with training. That is where patience comes in to play. You have to learn to breathe and conquer each obstacle one at a time. So I look at it this way; pain is part of the process. Without the pain whatever kind it is, one would not finish the process or the journey.

I remember a time that was even harder than training for my 5K. It was when my Grandma was dying. My mom was granting my grandma’s wish of taking care of her vs. putting her in a care home. I was married, had three kids, lived three hours away and was trying to help my mom any way I could in the last few days with my grandma. In the beginning she was doing really well, almost as if they gave her the wrong diagnosis. She was happy, strong, and her physical appearance looked normal. It was during this time that we had to learn patience as we waited for her to get worse.

How does a person wait and be patient for that?

All I know is that is where God comes in…the TRUST. We have to trust in his plan. I remember thinking as my grandma progressively got worse, she lost weight, her skin changed colors, then gained puffiness, added bruises and transformed into a person I didn’t know. Just as fast as the transformation started it stopped. I remember just getting to sleep one night when out of nowhere I felt a warm breeze touch me and my grandma was gone. Call it what you will, but I think it was my grandma’s spirit saying “Goodbye.”

But why God?

The pain…the patience…the trust.

Then I remembered our body is just our outer shell we don’t take it with us. It’s not really who we are. We should not be scared of the changes it goes through, but to remember the true person inside. It is still our loved one in all of that transformation. It is our spirit deep down within us that will live on forever. It is who we are!

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.”

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)


It is during the hardest of times that we learn the most!

Pain, patience and trust are all part of life not just in training for a 5K. If we did not go through the pain in our life, learn the patience and trust in God’s plan for us, we would not ever get to enjoy the finish line of eternal life.

Missy Hillmer

My name is Missy Hillmer. I’m married, live in a small town named Palmer, NE and have 3 children. Jake is our oldest who is 19 years old and Gracie is 11 who lives here with us. Tyler which was 15 years on August 20, 2013 is now in Heaven. He was killed in a car accident just 3 short days after his 15th birthday. I am very honest, very real sometimes to the point of not being fun, I guess that’s because I’m a black and white kind of girl. I like to look at the positive in every situation. I really believe there are two ways to look at things. Look for the bad or the good. The “bad” does me no justice and can spiral out of control in a heartbeat. The “good” however gives me hope and it connects with my belief that God is with me through everything. I believe my faith has gotten me through life and especially since my son’s accident. I pray a lot more, watch for the signs that God gives me, listen to my inner gut feeling, as my husband calls it and really focus on living a simple life. Family means everything to me, I love to laugh and think it’s the best medicine for any problem. Music soothes my sole and being outside in the sun brings me great joy! I have learned that many times you cannot control the storm in your life but, you can learn to dance in the rain. I really mean it when I say DANCE in the RAIN! The summer before Tyler’s accident, Tyler, Gracie & I danced in the rain. This memory I will never forget! Since Tyler’s accident I am passionate about telling my story with the hope that it will help or inspire at least one person.